people BigEvilDan is following

allenhenderson, andydougan, A_Chicka, Bargaintuan, Big_Evil_Dave, boorite, Brad, Braze, choadwarrior, crabby, descolada99, DexX, gabe_billings, ivytheplant, Johnny, Juanwalez, Kaddar, KajunFirefly, kaufman, Kevin_Keegans_Perm, kramer_vs_kramer, little_kitty, Lordfly, max, ObiJo, wirthling, ZachsMind

latest comics from people BigEvilDan is following

page 2

by crabby
You wanted to see me in your office Jim?
We start at 8 am everyday. Not 8:15. Not 8:20. We start at 8 am. If that doesn't work for you then you can start looking for other employment.
I've never been in your office before. Why don't you have any furniture in your office?
There's plenty of furniture in this office.
We're in the office right now with each other. There is no furniture in this office.
Get to work on time and get the hell out of my office. You piece of ****. You make me sick.

by crabby
How's the new floor in your kitchen? Didn't you just get it worked on?
Oh, it's awful! We got it done Stable Style. That means it's just dirt and horse ****. We have fresh **** shoveled in hourly from a local horse farm. Lovely neighborhood boy takes care of it for us.
The neighborhood boy takes care of your fresh manure for you?
He shovels in new **** every hour and sweeps out the old ****. Then he hauls it off of our property because we don't need **** all over the home.
So you just want **** all over your kitchen floor?
It's Stable Style. We won it on a game show.

by crabby
I appreciate you meeting me in the parking lot like this. It really means a lot that I can count on you.
It means the world to me that you would ask to meet me in the parking lot like this.
I've found a new job. This is my two weeks notice. I'm using my remaining PTO time as the two weeks. I won't be returning to the office. I'd like you to gather my belongings and burn them.
Let's just calm down. This is all happening very suddenly. Why don't we just go inside and discuss this further.
I'm sorry Jim. I won't be entering that building ever again. It's been a pleasure working with you.
I'm sorry to hear that Jim. Best of luck in your future endeavors.

by crabby
Where would you like to go for your birthday lunch? You want eggplant parmigna? Eggplant parmigna sandwich? Chicken Vesuvio? What can I get for you.
I was thinking we could pick up a turkey and go cook it like a couple of men making a Thanksgiving dinner in August. Tom the birthday turkey. We can make him together and then we can eat him together
That's really what you want to do, huh? You want to spend your 8th birthday making a Thanksgiving dinner with your old man?
More than anything in this world.
Go put your nice pants on. We're going grocery shopping.
These are my nice pants.

by crabby
I was at the fair this weekend and I saw a pasta stand called The Pasta Palace. Why would anyone get pasta from a shack at the fair?
To be fair, it is a pasta shack. I'm sure they know a thing or two about pasta.
Why would you get pasta at the fair though? Are you prepared to carry around a styrofoam container of pasta all day? You think you can handle a large platter of pasta on a hot Summer day?
I would never get pasta from a pasta shack, but I'm not a big pasta head either.
How about we go grab a couple of big plates of fettucini at the fair?
I thought you would never ask!

by crabby
When was the last time you had a Red Baron pizza?
A frozen one or from the actual restaurant?
Is there an actual Red Baron pizza restaurant that is associated with the frozen pizza brand?
I don't think so. It's not like how a Pizza Hut frozen pizza is from Pizza Hut.
There are frozen Pizza Hut brand frozen pizzas?

by crabby
Dad, I've been going through your computer. We need to talk.
Your journal says that my leg injuries aren't real. Your journal says I can walk.
You can't believe everything you read son.
My journal says you don't make it through the night! Should I believe that or is it as weak as your Everybody Loves Raymond fan fiction?
Tell you what, I'll go grab some Pizza Hut and we can we can try to punch those fan fics up together. Just like old times.

by crabby
How is everything going with the new restaurant?
It's been awful. The restaurant is a chicken shack where the servers are supposed to be rude to make you feel like you're eating with family.
Oh wow. I really hate places like that.
It's supposed to be interactive, but I guess not everyone realized it was performance theater. Dr. Dre was rather insulted by the bus boy inparticular who called him a Willy Wonka knock off.
Dr. Dre!
Oh no! Not that Dr. Dre. The other Dr. Dre.

by crabby
Give it to me straight doc. What's wrong with me?
Well, I'm a chef, but judging by that taste of blood you offered me I'd say your blood pressure is too high. Maybe lay off the fatty meats.
Which lunch meats would you most recmmend I stay away from?
Oh, my son! You need to avoid the capocollo, the salami, the prosciutto, the coppa, the mortadella, the soppressata!
What else did my tests reveal?
Your urine test revealed you need to drink more water. It tasted terrible.

by crabby
I'm not even sure where I am right now. Last thing I remember is heading over to a random dive bar I found while driving home from my grandmother's condo. DAMNIT!
WHO THE HELL AM I? What am I even doing here?
Dad, are you finished yet? You asked me to pull over so you could ****. That was 15 minutes ago. You fell for awhile and it seemed like you may be having a seizure, but I let you work through it.
I appreciate that son. You let me keep my dignity. You're a good boy.

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