people Brad is following

0401040, AccentuateNegative, allenhenderson, andydougan, BigFrank105, biped, boloboffin, boorite, choadwarrior, cpausti, crabby, Drexle, gabe_billings, habnem, Hari_Nezumi, Humpenstein, Injokester, Kaddar, kramer_vs_kramer, mandingo, mkilly, mmyers, NeoVid, pheryx, Rabid_Weasle, Scyess, squidrabies, stingo13, wirthling

latest comics from people Brad is following

Can I help you find anything?
I'm looking for dryer balls.
You're not going to get them from me, honey.

by choadwarrior
Okay, okay, I'm going to need a volunteer to come up. You sir--the one who hasn't laughed all night--I'm telling you to come up and I'll keep badgering you until you do.
We're going to re-enact a memorable day you had at work. Do you have one of those?
One morning, I woke up to find out that one of my students committed suicide-by-cop in the parking lot of our school.
Run with that, Mr. Funny Man.

by crabby
Not sure if you saw the company wide email that went out, but today is my 27th anniversary with Jerealy Paper Company.
Oh wow. I don't have access to email so I had no idea, but I appreciate you sharing the news with me. Congratulations on your achievement. How are you planning to celebrate?
Well, I figuered first I'd go around the office and let everyone know that today is my anniversary. Then I'd just sit at my desk and watch the time tick away.
Sounds like just another Tuesday to me!
Congratulations on your anniversary, Bill.

by crabby
Here's the thing. No one eats cereal anymore. No one eats it at all. There is no brand loyalty. There is no nostalgia. People just don't care.
So hear me out on this. I say we start a cereal blog. We call it curreal. A surreal look at cereal. We go so indepth and delve so deep into our own cereal desires that people will be interested.
I hate everything about your pitch. I hate the name curreal because it sounds like curreal and not surreal. I hate the idea about writing about cereal. Most of all I hate you.
I didn't want to bring this up, but remember when we were 8 and you almost drowned when you fell into that ice pond?
You pushed me, but fine. I'll write for your cereal blog.

by crabby
Son, just because you're at a party with your school friends doesn't mean that you don't have to watch your manners. I don't like some of the language I've heard you use today.
Sorry Dad. I just get a bit excited when I'm with my friends. Can you give me an example of something I said that you found inappropriate?
Well, I heard you tell your friend that you were going to hold him down and rub your **** against his face. That was extremely uncalled for.
DAD! Fuck, I didn't mean that! It's just something kids say. Like, "Do you play Fortnite" or "Who's Monica Lewinsky?"
I saw the two of you kissing shortly after that exchange.
It's 2019, Dad. Boys kiss at birthday parties.

Just so you know, since the last time we were together, I was diagnosed with HIV.
Are you taking your meds?
Yeah, and I'm undetectible.
I'm on PrEP and if we use protection with your undetectible status, there is a nearly zero chance of transmission.
Cool. Now if I could just get over this cold I'm fighting.
Get away.

by crabby
I appreciate you agreeing to meet me in this bar at 5am to discuss your father's will.
He's our father Diane. You can act like a stuck up ***** all you want, but that isn't going to bring dad back from the grave.
I'm not your sister. I'm just someone very interested in learning more about you and thought maybe we could get a drink sometime.
You invited me to a bar at 5am to ask me out for drinks sometime?
That sounds nice.

by crabby
How did your job interview go today?
Not well! The interviewer repeatedly told me that I had nice legs. He asked to take a few photos for their records, but it seemed very unprofessional.
I thought you were just trying to deliver pizzas on the weekends for a few extra bucks?
It's 2019 DAD! Nobody just "delivers pizza" anymore. You dumb fat ****. You ****ing piece of ****. Go **** yourself you ****ing ****.
I don't like your tone.
sorry dad.

by crabby
Sorry I'm late Bill. You'll never believe this, but Mark Wahlberg attacked me with a pair of scissors.
That sure doesn't sound like something Mark Wahlberg would do.
You know what, it was actually Donnie Wahlberg. Stabbed me with pencil in the neck.
Now that I believe. Take the rest of the day to recover. See you Monday.

I tried my first Honey Tangerine tonight. I didn't care for it.
by crabby, 4-11-19

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