people Dimebag_Darrell is following

FriedMilk, Injokester, TMCG, TooMuchCoffeeGuy, VampireHunter_C790

latest comics from people Dimebag_Darrell is following

page 2

by Injokester
Any progress with the debacle that is the new task management process?
Absolutely, I'm making great headway.
I discovered that every time I update a task it sends an email notification to my manager.
Ooh, that'll keep them busy.
Oh yeah, I've got an automated script running on a loop, I haven't even been to my desk in three days.

by Injokester
How's the new task management system working out for you guys?
It's not too bad, it's a lot more work to manage than the old one, but it's mainly the managers who have to deal with that.
I can say it's definitely a lot less stressful now though.
Because you've only got time for "task management" and not actual work?
Mainly because watching the managers suffer more than I do is good for morale.

by Injokester
So you built me specifically to take over the world and kill all the humans. Why would you do that?
I came out of my lab after spending the last 15 years developing a cure for cancer, and discovered reality television.
Ah, fair call.

by Injokester
Hey Jesus, what's with the last 2000 years? Why didn't you do something about the wars and famines?
Why didn't you?
Oh, I don't believe in God, because instead of proving God's worth all of his representatives demand I accept him as being better than me without giving reason.
They what? Fuckers.
I left, like, 12 guys to explain that ****.

by Injokester
Excuse me, could you possibly direct me to the train station?
Yeah, go down that way, turn left at the Starbucks,
Then left again at the McDonalds, then right at the next McDonalds, then right after the Starbucks on this side of the street, not the one on the other side.
Oh, so it's right by the public library?
The what?

by Injokester
Hi, do you happen to have all 4 books from Jack Vance's Planet of Adventure series,
But with covers in the same style?
We actually do, though 2 of them are in really poor condition and 2 are practically new.
Maybe you could damage the two good ones so they're consistent?

by Injokester
Chen, thank you for coming. I wanted to talk to you about the policy regarding the employee fridge.
Are you aware that food must be eaten by the person whose name is on it, and only by that person?
Yes ma'am, I'm aware of that policy, I actually wrote it.
Excellent. I put a jar of expired mayonnaise mixed with centipedes in the vegetable fresher with your name on it.
I knew I should have worded that policy better.

by Injokester
Chen, I'm Isabella, the boss' new personal assistant.
Oh, that's the role I've been fulfilling. Am I being moved?
No, you're the boss' professional assistant. Your job is to assist in his professional duties from day to day.
Oh. So where do you fit in?
My job is to assist him in tormenting you and generally making your life difficult.

by Injokester
Dad, what's the secret of being a father?
Well Son, it's all about giving advice. There's 3 things you have to remember.
One; Always smoke a pipe. Two; Always wear a cardigan. Three; Always put your foot up on something.
Is that why you knocked mom to the floor?
That's right Timmy, because I'm a tip-top Dad.

by Injokester
Okay, you gotta go right, then left, then fake right followed by a quick left.
Wait, fake right?
Yeah, that's what I said.
Coach, I just need to know where the bathroom is.
That's what I told you, go right, then left, peek in the girls bathroom, then quickly run into the mens.

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