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latest comics from people DragonXero is following

page 2

by kaufman
This episode was scheduled to air on November 24, 1963.
Arf! Arf Arf. Rrrrruff!
What's that, Lassie?
Arf Arf Arf. Rarararrr!
Timmy stole a rifle from my gun cabinet and hooked the trigger to a timer?
For some reason, CBS never broadcast it, and destroyed the tapes
Ruff rufff! RRRRRarrrf!
And went to Texas and left it on a grassy knoll, ready to go off midday Friday? I'm going to have to have a talk with that boy.

by kaufman
Wait a minute!
You're not wearing a bunny suit. Does that mean that you don't need to wear one to keep the aliens from making you want to kill yourself?
And you're not wearing a clown suit. I was going to ask you the same thing. I think we've been had.
Hey, do you think we ought to tell the blindfolded family over there that there's really nothing to worry about?

by kaufman
Spock! I just heard this contest is going to be decided by a random number generator! I need to know a lucky number so we can win.
Captain, with all due respect, it is illogical to think of numbers as lucky. Besides, I am quite busy right now. Dr. McCoy asked me to improve a Christmas song.
Well, is there a number in that song I can use or something?
Very well, Captain. The number is 5,878,625,373,183.6
Five trillion, eight hundred what? What the hell carol is that from?
On the 5,878,625,373,183.6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, 5,878,625,373,183.6 miles in a light year, 5,878,...

by KajunFirefly
Do you want to watch the new Doctor Who? I think you'll like it.
How is he a girl now?
Well, The Doctor isn't really a "he", The Doctor is a Timelord from the planet Gallifrey and when their bodies are decaying they have the biological ability to regenerate their cells...
When they die they respawn with a new custom skin.

by batFucker
Hit this dog while on my way to work today.
Was driving along and next thing you know there's this dog and two pups trying to cross the road. I swerved hard. Then heard a thud. Turns out I hit the dog. It was awful.
Still can't believe I missed the pups.

by batFucker
Dude got ****ed today cuz I told him his wife was hot.
Turns out it was his daughter.
In my defense, she was a very mature looking 8-year-old.

by batFucker
Was on this dating site. Filling out my ****. Tryin' to find a match. But this **** is tough. And at the end of the day, I got no matches.
Maybe that picture of my dog's **** wasn't the best profile pic.
And of course that error I kept getting when searching for 12-year-olds was ****ing up my game too.

by batFucker
Went to the movies last night. Hadn't been in ages. Most movies suck now. No point in going.
Also I was banned from the theater for jerking it.
Didn't think anyone would notice, but I guess there were other people in line.

by batFucker
I hate drama. People talkin' ****. Fuck 'em. So sick of hearing this shirt. "Stop being so selfish." "Stop being so irresponsible."
"Stop molesting my daughter."
Just shut it, mom.

by batFucker
Got fired again this week. But it wasn't my fault.
Everyone beats off at work now and then. Seriously. But no one ****ing knocks anymore.
Guess maybe that's cuz these cubes got no doors.

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