people JacquiF is following

chaobell


latest comics from people JacquiF is following

by chaobell
12-19-02
Sarah speaks to the cartoonist.
So you're actually drawing a comic now.
In the loosest sense of the word "draw," yeah.
Cool.
...so do you think you could get off your fat ass and submit some characters so I can stop wearing lara's pic?
Settle down there, Beavis. Don't make me use this.

by chaobell
12-08-02
Bloop bloop bloop bloop bloop bloop, "bloop bloop bloop bloop!"
Bloop bloop!
What the **** are you talking about?

by chaobell
12-03-02
Hello there, young lady!
Gramma BFG! What can I do you for?
Oh, I just needed you to put some bits in my computer. Here's my new video card, CPU, and a whole mess o' RAM for it. Tried to do it myself, but I kept losin' the damn screws in the carpet.
Yeah, that's a pain in the--holy **** would you look at this box!?
Yeah, I know, it's kinda outdated. It's only got a gig of RAM in it right now.
........will you adopt me?

by chaobell
12-01-02
"But Chaobell," you say, "this **** takes too long and besides, I can't ignore him. Isn't there a faster way?" Well, sure! There are a number of quicker ways to be rid of a troll. Flash floods...
glub glub hate glub glub **** **** **** glub glub
Yo soy El Pisco Bandito. Dame todo su milhojas de manzana.
...high explosives...
Suck my balls, bit--AAAACK
...or alien abduction. All of which are either unlikely or illegal, or possibly both. Just suck it up and ignore the ****er. Trust me.
Hey, you know where you can stick your ****in' alien probe?
Oh, I already know where to stick it. Bend over.

by chaobell
12-01-02
One final warning: trolls tend to keep lurking in a community for a while after they've gotten bored with it.
Naah.
So if a few days go by without a peep from the troll, do not say something like:
Boy, I'm sure glad that troll is gone!
...or you'll have to do it all over again.
MOTHER****ER!
I COMMAND ALL CHIXX0RZ TO SEND ME N00D PIX!!!!!!

by chaobell
11-30-02
Now, the tricky part here is, no matter what the troll says, no matter how obscene or personal his remarks may be, ignore him completely.
Yoo-hoo! Look at me! Toilet humor! Racist bull****! I ****ed your mom last night!
...then you take the extra gauntlets back up to Bishop...
Do not reply to any of his posts. Do not even mention him in passing. Just pretend he doesn't exist.
Twice! I had a dime! And I ****ed your dad too!
...then after you release Garg, he kills all the goblins and you're free to wander around the Prison Tower as you please...
And there you go! Problem solved! It may take a few days or even weeks, but he will get bored and move on to greener pastures.
And I've got your hamster up my ass! I...oh, screw you guys. I'm going home.
...and then once Altara makes the wand for you, just wave it in Bishop's cell...

by chaobell
11-30-02
Trolls are not human. They do not feel pain. They cannot be reasoned with.
BLAAAAAAARGH FUX0RZ J00 GAY R3GZ BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
Woe!
But don't give up hope yet! Trolls have a weakness: their burning desire to be the center of attention at all times.
**** **** HATE **** ******** BALLS FART ****SUCKER
Like four-year-olds, you mean.
So, if the troll feels he's not getting enough attention in the community he's currently infesting, he will pack his **** and go somewhere else.
**** CATS EAT BABIES **** **** BALLS ****S--hey! Are you listening!?
How 'bout them Rockets?

by chaobell
11-30-02
This cute little bird has graciously volunteered to play the part of the troll. You may be tempted to respond to a troll like so:
BLAAAAAAARGH FUX0RZ J00 GAY R3GZ BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
**** off!
This is, however, not recommended.
Uh-oh.
Trolls, like the salamanders of legend, thrive on fire. Flaming them will just make them stronger.
BLAAAAAAARGH FUX0RZ J00 GAY R3GZ BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
Great.

by chaobell
11-30-02
****! I was going to get some yarn while I was in there...well, no way in Hell am I going back into that war zone today.
Eh, screw it. I'll just go to Hobby Lobby. Sure, it's a little more expensive, but at least folks will be /civilized/ there. Right? .../right?/
Wrong.
SOMEONE TELL THIS ***** SHE DOESN'T NEED 30 YARDS OF RED FLANNEL! I SAW IT FIRST!
Oh, fer ****'s sake, people!

by chaobell
11-30-02
...so you better start ringing me up right the **** now, or I'm going to sue your ass!
Sir, if you don't watch your language, I'm going to call security.
The hell you will! I'm giving you THREE SECONDS to start ringing, and then--AAACK
Uh, sorry about that. I didn't think he'd splatter that much. Anyway, how much for the shampoo?
It's on me! Guys, can we get a cleanup on lane 2, please?

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