All comics by LurkerrX

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by LurkerrX
8-12-02
Hey there, Tiger!
Pretend you can't hear him.
How about you and me cut a rug, sexy?
Ah, huh, yeah, um, no, that is, I got a. . .herpes.
Oh no! Herpes!
Herpes is funny. Laugh at herpes, and people who have herpes.

 

by LurkerrX
8-12-02
*sigh*
What's wrong, Steve?
I just found out I have herpes!
That's okay, they can cure herpes now with a single pill!
REALLY? That's wonderful!
No, not really, you stupid fuck. Herpes never goes away, just ask Mrs. Claus! You're doomed to life with herpes, you freak! AH HA HA HA HO HO HO!!!

 

by LurkerrX
8-12-02
Dear Mr. Jeffries, your test results have returned, and . . .
I'm a dinosaur!
...you have HERPES!
Look at me, I'm a dinosaur!
Oh well, at least my nose isn't gushing blood.
I'm a dinosaur! I get the Batman Returns reference! I'm a dinosaur! Herpes is funny!

 

by LurkerrX
8-12-02
"Family Reunion"
WAY too much Chili.
My Levi's getting heavy.
Poo-poo EVERYWHERE!

 

by LurkerrX
8-12-02
"High Hopes"
Out the L.B.C.!
I'm sippin' on some syzurp!
Still just a white guy.

 

by LurkerrX
8-12-02
"Baby Daddy"
My baby daddy!
Maury's Paternity tests. . .
Nothin' but a ho.

 

by LurkerrX
1-10-03
My nuts on your chin
Bitch, that's a dick in your mouth!
You'll learn to like it

 

by LurkerrX
1-10-03
"Happy Workers"
A fountain of blood
I feast upon his entrails
Killed my manager

 

by LurkerrX
1-10-03
Bitches need to learn
Not to get so uppity
Before they get BEAT

 

by LurkerrX
1-10-03
Hey there, Mark! Why so glum?
It's Christmas. It always depresses me.
Oh, that's so sad. Why?
Because I'm a throbbing dick who hates Jesus almost as much as I hate children!
You're too much, Mark!
Yeah. I'm off to fuck your mother.

 

by LurkerrX
1-10-03
Hey, it's Jesus! How you doin, J?
I'm nailed to a cross.
I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to offend you!
I'm not offended. I love everyone.
Except people with herpes, right?
YES! Those people are fornicators, and smell funny, and thusly deserve a hideous lifetime with Herpes. And then they burn in hell while children laugh at them.

 

by LurkerrX
1-13-03
We live under the sea.
Do we?
Look around you? See the lovely fishes and syringes?
Nope.
Then we must be Colombian drug smugglers! OYE! Kill the gringo policia!
I don't know who you are or where you came from, but I'm not paying for your surgery. That's not remotely funny

 

by LurkerrX
1-14-03
MORTAL! I AM GREAT CHTULHU!
OH MY FUCKING GAAWWWD!!! AAAAHHHH!!!!
That's right, mortal! Tremble in fear. Your mewling does not even amuse me. I shall devour your soul, and think nothing of it, for you are as dust in my wake!
Hm? Oh, hey, Chtulhu. I didn't see you there. Look out behind you!
Thaths right, iths sthpanking time!
Huh, what? OH MY FUCKING GAAWWWD!!! AAAAHHHH!!!!

 

by LurkerrX
1-14-03
Hello.
What up?
Are you a REAL cowboy?
No, I'm not even a fake cowboy. Why do you ask.
Nelson is not good with punchlines.
Oh, I see. I'm not going to have your gay man-sex with you, village person!
Hmm. . .eat a dick?

 

by LurkerrX
1-14-03
Old woman! Come to me, for I am Great Chtulhu!
Wacky. What's up with that shit? Is there a Chtulhu revival?
Aren't you frightened? Aren't you peeing in your Depends?
I don't wear depends. I just piss in my pants and let it show to the world
Thou art my new master.
And you may call me "daddy".

 

by LurkerrX
1-14-03
I EAT EIGHT MEALS A DAY.
But I can't stop losing weight.
Hey, this Herpes thing ain't so bad!

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