people MaxPayne is following
attitudechicka, A_Chicka, BigEvilDan, boinky33, boorite, dcomposed, Denyer, DragonXero, evil_d, Ewwwww, joshw, ladyjdotnet, little_kitty, Matchbook_Romance, MikeyG, mmyers, naz_ghul, UnknownEric
latest comics from people MaxPayne is following 
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You are standing inside the temple in Jerusalem. Several moneychangers and other merchants are operating tables here. There are exits to the north, east, south, and west.
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The merchants are too busy to talk with you right now.
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| QUOTE SCRIPTURE TO MERCHANTS | |
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I don't understand what you want to do with the merchants.
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| Those Jerries think they've got us pinned down, but we ain't givin' up yet! | |
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| Johnson! Callahan! I want you to circle around and attack their flank, on the double! | |
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| And for the love of God stop looking like a pair of feet! | |
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| Dad, I still don't understand why we take the humans and insert tubes into their waste canals. | |
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| Well, we can't communicate with the humans, but we know they enjoy waste-canal insertion since we found two of them doing it in a field. | |
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| So now, every few months, we bring a chosen few up to the ship to further our mission of bringing them happiness and love! | |
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| I guess that makes sense. But why do we do it to the cows? | |
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| Surprised Moos Vol. 1 was a best-selling album for nine straight weeks! | |
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| Man, nobody will buy us any booze! | |
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| I know exactly what to do, man. | |
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| Go get a bucket of water and Mary and Joseph's son... | |
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| Imma turn this **** into wine! | |
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| Hi Jim, welcome to heaven. | |
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| I'm in heaven? Can I meet famous dead people here? Like Jimi Hendrix? | |
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| Sure, they're all over the place. | |
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| How bout Kurt Cobain? Jim Morrison? Adam Yauch? | |
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| MCA's in the back, cause he's skeezin' with a *****. | |
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| This is... ONE! STEP! BEYOND! | |
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Doo-doo-doooooooooo, doodoododo dodo...
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| pickitup, pickitup, pickitup... | |
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| So let me get this straight, you had 5 cats, 3 gerbils and a raccoon over. You ****ed the raccoon in the ass, while the gerbils blew the other cats. | |
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| Then you shat on the gerbils, who then ran around in another cat's ass, while the other 4 cats ****ed on each other. | |
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| What the **** do you call this? | |
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| Hi, Honey! Hey, why are you packing up all your stuff? | |
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| *sigh* I'd hoped to just leave a note.
I'm leaving you. I've been seeing someone much, much smarter than you are, behind your back. | |
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| Wait a second! Is this an April Fool's prank? You're just ACTING like you're leaving me! | |
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| April F... Yes. That's right, sure. I'm just acting. | |
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| I'm just committing to the role. | |
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| Man, I can't believe you got double crossed like that. | |
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| The sign outside says, "No interest for 5 years." Is that special still active? | |
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| I was interested in buying a sofa for my living room... | |
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| I said I was interested... | |
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| Yeah, that's what I thought you said. Look, you read the sign. I'm going to have to ask you to leave. | |
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