people ObiJo is following

allenhenderson, BigEvilDan, boorite, crabby, DexX, evil_d, gabe_billings, inseguri, KajunFirefly, kaufman, maxawa, onion2k, RyanK, Scyess, TEDA, Waste_Of_A_Sniper, wirthling


latest comics from people ObiJo is following

by crabby
7-17-19
Hi! I'm Larry. I'm the new Quality Control Specialist. I'm just really excited to be here!
Nice to meet you Larry.
So my kids would tell me, "DADDY! Why do you have to work so much?" I just told them that when you do what you love then you aren't working.
Pretty good, Larry.
I've got a 45 minute drive home. I need to boot scoot on out of here on the dot at 3pm.
End of day is 3:30 Larry.

by crabby
7-09-19
It was not a good day for me today. At the grocery store I left the car door open on the way inside. Someone in the parking lot called out to let me know I forgot to close it.
That's embarassing.
Then an elderly woman pointed out that I had my youngest child's shoes on the wrong feet.
That's embarassing.
Then after I finsihed paying I walked away and left my phone at the checkout counter. I think I have early onset dementia. I think it's from all the years of drugs.
I think you're just a ****ing idiot.

by crabby
7-08-19
Look, I just wanted to come by and apologize. I was out of line for what I said in the restaurant last week. Open the door and hug me like the brother you are.
You son of a *****. I'm coming in there one way or another. Don't think this door is going to keep me from my brother. I'm kicking the door down!
Jesus. I can't believe it. My brother killed himself.

by crabby
7-08-19
I don't know why I bought this restaurant. I don't know what I'm doing with this place. I tried to hire a management firm to run it so I can go back to Pittsburgh, but I just don't trust anyone.
What the hell do you want?
I just came here to see how you're doing. Make sure you're living up to our father's legacy.
YOU GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW!
I'll leave, but not because you told me to leave. I'm leaving because the job you're doing here makes me sick. I wish you the worst.

by crabby
7-08-19
What are you doing here, Pete? I haven't seen you in almost 30 years.
Ma says you're selling the restaurant?
So that's it huh? You come back from Pittsburgh like some sort of hot shot to throw your weight around? Ma is seriously in debt. We need to sell the restaurant and put the money toward debt.
That was our father's restaurant you heartless son of a *****!
Do you want to buy nthe restaurant or not? Huh? You Pittsburgh hero. Pony up if you want to be a big man. DO YOU WANT IT OR NOT?
You know what, I will buy the restaurant.

by crabby
7-08-19
You look terrible. What happened? You've been looking really healthy lately, but you look absolutely awful compared to when I saw you two months ago.
I had been really taking care of myself for the past 18 months or so and then out of nowhere I started feeling too thin. I was worried that I couldn't gain weight. I was scared it might be cancer.
Did you visit a doctor? Is everything ok?
I didn't go to a doctor. I just started eating like **** and drinking heavily again.
And are you feeling better?
I've never felt worse, but the good news is I've gained 16 pounds. I might feel like ****, but at least it's not cancer!

by crabby
7-08-19
It wasn't my proudest weekend. I've been reluctant to admit it in the past, but I think it's time I finally admit the truth. I have an alcohol problem.
Did you **** your pants again?
No! There are just large chunks of the weekend that I don't remember at all. I returned books to the library. I ate five chicken sausages. I grilled chicken sausages.
But did you **** yourself?
No! I'm just worried that I have a problem that I can't control like I thought I could. I'm scared.
I'm scared you're about to **** your pants right now.

by kaufman
7-03-19
In other news, auto executive Lee Iacocca has died at age 94.
Iacocca is credited with bringing Chrysler back from the brink during the 1980s.
His family released a short statement: "If you can find a better corpse, bury it."

by crabby
7-01-19
I hope you're able to make it to my birthday party this weekend. Should be a lot of fun. Everybody from the office is coming. I have the party every year. Everyone always has a great time.
Sure. I'll be there. Is there anything I can bring?
Don't forget to bring your $250 entrance fee. That will cover all your food, unlimited trips to the petting zoo, admission to the Levi Blue Jeans Pinata Party, and a tip for the cleaning crew.
And how much if I don't want to participate in all of that?
Well, if you don't want to participate you can either stay home or go straight to Hell. Your pick.
See you in Hell, Gary.

by crabby
7-01-19
I saw Undertaker on TV last night. I was just flipping through the channels and he was on TV talking about, "The rich and creamy stench of the underbelly of the under utilized... REST IN PEACE"
You just happened to see Undertaker, huh bro?
Well, I use the Undertaker App. It sends me a text whenever the Undertaker appears on Television.
What's the name of that app?
The Undertaker App. It lets you know when Undertaker is on television.
I gotta get that app.

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