people Porternotes is following

13gallons, abeloctavio, atomiclunch, brycekain, evil_d, four_legged_tripod, HCRoyall, Injokester, jes_lawson, Makin_d_bacon, millergirl12, Moturd, Pandeist

latest comics from people Porternotes is following

by atomiclunch
*kzzzt* okay, this has to sound official or we're gonna be in trouble, got it? Yeah, I got this.
*Ahem* Mission control to Commander Chen. You may have noticed that we've been investigating a *snrk* "anomaly* in the artificial gravity for the past few hours. How's everything now?
*snicker* Er, Commander Chen? Is everything okay?
Oh, dandy. I just decoupled the restroom module. It should be landing on you guys in a few minutes. YOU clean it up!

by Makin_d_bacon
Hi there!
Staring is NOT polite you know!
But I'm NOT staring! I'm imagining my **** between your tits!
You wha...?
Was it worth it, you horny perv? frigid *****!!

by Moturd
President Trump asked for and received a mental health assessment called the MoCA, which is short for Montreal Cognitive Assessment.
Wait. He asked for the test himself?
He did. He actively asked me to bring one with me and to give it to him during my physical exam. He passed with a perfect score.
Aha! But wouldn't only a crazy person question his own mental health?
Where the hell is my mocha latte? I asked Dr. Ronny to get me one, like, hours ago!

by Moturd
Does the president wear prosthetics such as dentures, toupee, or enlarged hands?
Can you explain why the mental health assessment missed signs of Alzheimers?
Which parts of your report can best be used to decalare Trump unfit to hold office under the 25th amendment?
Are the words 'clean bill of health' actually code for 'riddled with cancer'?
Is it true that in your professional opinion the president is going to die?
Yes. We all will, eventually.

by Makin_d_bacon
How was THAT?
Nice... but sort of inappropriate!
Why? Ain't ya a darned Catholic?
It's not THAT...
Why so hard on that poor guy?
I can only take so many verses of ..."In Heaven Der Ees No Beer"....

by Makin_d_bacon
Neil, I left a yule log in the bathroom that needs tending to.
Jesus...what in the holy hell died in here, Neil?
I believe Delmar gave birth in stall #3 a minute ago!
What exactly do you ingest, my dear Delmar, that leaves us with such pungent ordors.
Other than boiled eggs, snoots, saurkraut, chile and baked beans smothered in Broccoli and Cauliflower, nuthin but draft beer!

by Makin_d_bacon
Today class, we will learn about NEW California!
Which part is gonna be new?
The rural areas want to be seperated from the big cities!
So the new part will be all farmers? All the sex, drugs, rock n roll, porn and all other perversities will remain in the OLD part?
That's a bit over simplified, but YES!
Fuck the FARMERS!

September 23, 1806
Uhngh! Oh yeah! Here it comes! Wait for it! HOLY SACAJAWEA!
Lewis, what's a Sacaja-whatever?
Well, uh, it's uh, it's not a person in case you're wondering.
Yeah. It's uh, it's a new swear brought over by the British.
Oh, like ****** ****!

What are you eating?
Oh for ****s sake! You're not eating them becuase Dolores O'Riordan the lead singer of the Cranberries just died are you?
Of course not. I'm getting ready to celebrate her return.
Her return?
As a zombie, of course.

by Makin_d_bacon
Would you vote for a "black"?
I dunno. A "black" what?
I DARE ya to tell me she wasn't ****in with me!
I'll take that as a "NO", Cracker!

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