people crabby is following

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latest comics from people crabby is following

by choadwarrior
12-07-19
What time is it? I need to scoot.
You mean you need to scratch your butt across the carpet like a dog?
No, I need to leave.
I do.

Ah, mucho mejor!
You're killing me with your gigantic ****s, O.J.!
It's what I do!
What? Gigantic ****s?
No. Killing.
*BUUURRRRRRRP* Oh, God... The after taste is horrible!!

*rub* *rub* *rub*
What are you doing, Bill?
The Air Dick has some residual Air Spooge from its jack off session earlier and I'm wiping it off on this here wall.
I don't see a thing!
If, you turn out the lights and shine a black light on the wall, you'll see it. Yes. YOU. WILL. SEE. IT!!!!
When was your last mental exam, Bill?

Air Dick, Wirthling?
Air Body, Bill?
Yes. Wait.
What?

Holy ****... Look at that blood trail!
It must go on for a couple of hundred feet or more!
It seems to end right in front of that ARCO's garage.
You thinking what I'm thinking?
One of the females involved in the accident was on her period and the impact popped out her tampon, so she scurried over to the gas station to plug her bleeding hole with a used MacPherson strut!
Uh, yeah... Something like that.

Hey, teacher... Where's the Janpanese erotic art section?
Japanese erotic art section?
Yeah, the paintings where the Jap dudes are depicted with monster-sized *****es!
Are they really drawn like that?
Yeah.
Try the fictional art wing.

This is it Scnookums...
This is the day I finally step out into the real world confront my agoraphobia head on! YAY!
"LOOK, EVERYBODY!! IT'S A BIG PUSSY HOLDING A LITTLE PUSSY!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!"
Or ****ing not!

God, it is really hot here near the Mount Kilawea lava flow!
What would you say the number is?
111.
The lava's degrees gotta be way higher than that!
Lava? Oh, I thought you were talking about RCLG's stalled number of followers!

Meanwhile, back in the carwash rack...
Have you finished detailing that Mustang GT, Butch?
No.
Well, it's been three hours and my customer is about to walk!
So?
So, I stand to lose my $2500 sales commission!
I make $12 per hour... Do you think I give a **** about your @%#$ commission??

Then, I says to that *******, Schiff, "You can't impeach me for swimming nude in the Reflection Pool outside the Lincoln Memorial!"
Then, he says, "I can if you forgot to pay the $500 fine!"
To which I says, "SHI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-IT!!" Are you getting all of this, Ivanka?

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