All comics by crazymalicous

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by crazymalicous
6-06-05
The Adventures Of Bobby The Stick Dude: A New Hammer
So these are the instructions for that new hammer.
Alrighty I'm gonna put that picture up on the wall.
Made By Kyle
I think I did something wrong.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
After a night of partying Bobby is passed out in a trash can. Justice will be served!!!!!!!
Uh... it wasn't me.
Hi there. I'm sorry but sitting passed out in a trash can is illegal. I'm gonna have to write you up a ticket.
But I can't go to jail!Oh my god I will die! BWAAAAAHHHHH!
Yeah.
Done with the breakdown?

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Have you seen the new Star Wars yet?
No I haven't. How was it?
Anikan blows up and Obi Wan gets his face chopped up. Then Padme does it with Qui Gonn Jin who magically came back to life.
So you never saw it.
Um, no.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Hi. I heard you were new to EZ Cheez City. Let me show you around. My name is Tots.
This is the bar. It is probably my favorite place in all of EZ Cheez City. I mean... uhm...
Sometimes very bloody gang wars happen here in the Big Cheez. I am in the Taters Gang. I have killed many a friend in battle. So there you have it. I hope you look for new EZ Cheez City comics. Cya!

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Holy crap you're hot.
AH! WHAT DID YOU DO!
I ripped your clothes off...
Let's fuck.
Yes, lets.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Hello. Would you like to geekspeak with me?
No. I came to slice your fucking head off.
Wait! How about we settle this over a game of Calculator vs. Brain? No? I didn't think so...
That's right, bitch.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Oh god this town has been over run by the Amish...
So what do you do for a living?
I sell crack.
Uh... forget what I said earlier. Amish rule!! Yay!!
That will be a million dollars.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Why are you a clown? They get paid minimum wage and get spit upon at the circus. Then the elephants crap all over the place and you have to clean it up. So why?
Because the world needs clowns. I like doing what I do.
Why are you in a bar?
I'm depressed, I have elephant crap in my hair, and my girlfriend left me for a guy with huge glasses. Being a clown sucks.

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
Hi! Today I will talk about the new Star Wars.
Get immersed in a world of savory crunchy chocolate flavor. It will taste like heaven on earth once you bite into one of these lovely delights...
Oh sorry I'm reading my candy bar wrapper!

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
So the other day I got this great game.
I can't stop playing it!
It comes with a special controller that you have to touch and sniff to use. You just need to keep using it! I swear to recover that thing in powder it cost me 5 million bucks!

 

by crazymalicous
6-06-05
So the other day I had to pick up my shoes at a factory.
I wasn't the least bit worried until I walked in the door. Have a look at the picture.
I smell sweatshop...
Why hello. I really shouldn't talk to you now or Boss might give me even less than gum for lunch. Here are your shoes. I made them today.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
Hello earthling!
Oh god no... oh god no....
My name is Trojan!
Where'd you get that name.
Off the side of this here box of circley things. Hm.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
So what exactly do you eat?
TROJAN!!!!
Uh...
You know... right down in the Nether Regions...
Uhm. Don't tell anyone this. I have some under my bed.
I figured you did.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
Hello.
Why hello there.
What do you do for fun?
I eat condoms.
I like latex licking men.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
So what did you do today Trojan?
I met a woman.
Did you tell her about your love for eating condoms?
Yes.
How shallow.
Sure.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
That was fun.
Oh Trojan your amazing!!!!!!!!!
Although you bit off your condom.
Baby.
Yes. Baby.

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
Oh... it's so cute...
Gaga goo.
He's so worth biting off the condom.
Trojan?

 

by crazymalicous
6-07-05
That thing your wearing looks like the pee suit my Grandpa wears when he gets too excited.
Uhm... it's not a pee suit.
What is it then?
A SuperNova Hyper Duality Reflux Testing Shooter Double X4 Powered Processer of Graphics Reality System RPG. It's a virtual reality videogame suit. It puts you in the middle of an RPG.
Have fun with that now.
OK. Here goes nothing....

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero he was putting on his Virtual Reality Suit for his new game Virtual Reality RPG. Now he is transferring between his world and the next.
Maybe Jeff was right. They do use this thing as a pee suit because you get so scared in the vortex of terror... let's not go into details.
Oh my god! My suit is off... I'm stuck in the game. *pssss* Oh pee suit, I need your heavy duty protection!

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Daddy has to leave now to help America.
Ok have fun don't die.
Later...
Oh... oh... lick it like you mean it... oh...
Hoochie mama!
After a night of masturbating...
I have cummed myself.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left Kyle he had entered the game but he was stuck in it! How will he get out? The suspense is killing me!
Oh look. Fire. I need to get past it!
Soon Kyle came to a wise old man's home.
You must find the ICE STAFF to get past the WALL OF FIRE.
Yeah... anything else?
You must find the ICE STAFF to get past the WALL OF FIRE.
Yeah... this is going nowhere.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero Kyle he was trying to get some valubale info out of the wise old man on how to pass the wall of fire. They are still arguing.
You must find the ICE STAFF to get past the WALL OF FIRE.
Hey aren't you that guy from Super Mario Brothers?
Um... no comment.
Hey!!!!!!! He finally said something! After 5 hours he said something different!
Ok ok... I'm unemployed and I really needed the work. Now my bro Luigi has the spotlight. Ever seen a new Mario Tennis game lately? They renamed it Luigi's Tennis featuring Anna Kournikova.
Poor, poor, sap.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero Kyle he was talking to Mario about where he could find the Ice Staff to freeze the Wall of Fire. His best guess: cheezy looking angel.
Hello. I heard you owned the Ice Staff.
Staff is not a nice word.
Uh... it isn't?
No it refers to the male reproductive organ.
What if I said Ice Piece of Wood?
No, that sounds like your referring to an erection. Am I bringing you sexual pleasure?

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero Kyle he was asking Angel if he had the Ice Staff. It ended with them talking about Kyle getting... aroused.
So you think that I am getting a boner because of you?
Don't say boner it's not a nice world.
God help me...
Just give me the fucking Ice Staff.
Ok here. Humph.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero Kyle he had gotten the Ice Staff from Angel, the very strange angel guy. Now let's see the battle. Kyle-0 Fire-0
I will vanquish you fire! I have the Ice Staff!
Wait wait... you think you will kill me with that? Yeah right! BURN!
Kyle-0 Fire-1 Booyah!
Bwahahahahah!
Ow.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Why hello big old pencil. Why are you so straight?
So I can ride all night long.
I like to ride too!
Meet me in the back room, 3 am. I will bring a condom.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left Kyle he lost a fight with the fire. He got burned up. So sad.
Where am I?
You are at a PokeHospital!
Did you keep my Ice Staff?
Um... your Ice Staff? Am I making you feel aroused?
*sigh* Not this again god...
Let's go at it, you big pimp!

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Wow I am outside in my boxers.
I wonder if anyone will see me.
And now, a blonde dude in his boxers!
That's just wrong. Poor sap.

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Wow you are a hot penguin.
Why thank you.
I have 50 dollars.
Let's get it on!!!!!!!!!!

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Wow it's a mad butcher. Woldja look at that.
Hi.
You scare me.
That's great.
Flowers for leader?

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
Hey what's up! I am Kyle aka crazymalicous.
I really pretty much look like this in real life. Scary, eh?
Kyle, I got you a new videogame!
OWNAGE!!!!!!!

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left Kyle he was in a hospital with a really hot chick. She asked him if he wanted to get down. He accepted.
Wow.
That was amazing.
Um... did you wear a condom?
Oh damn it!
Oh no...

 

by crazymalicous
6-08-05
When we last left our hero Kyle he did it with some blonde and they made a baby. Yay. The baby holds secret info. By the way this is the last Virtual Reality RPG. I had a lot of fun with this series.
He's so cute! I will name him Heff.
I found your Virtual Reality Suit.
OH MY GOD! GIVE ME THE SUIT!
Here.
I'm comin' home! Bye Heff. Oh what was I thinking. Come along with me, Heff! And you too, Blondey!
Yay!

 

by crazymalicous
6-09-05
Arrgh matey! You shiver me timber!
Don't you mean timbers?
Oh god. I have just cummed myself.
Oh I like that in a man.
WOAH! SOMETHINGS shivering my timber!
That would be my hand.

 

by crazymalicous
6-09-05
WATER STINKS! DOWN WITH WATER!
I'm protesting against water.
I'm going to burn you all up!
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Hello my name is John the evil pumpkin.
Hello I like pumpkin pie.
You dare eat a pumpkin? I will kill you!
Ahhhhh nooooo.
I killed him with a giant fly swatter.

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Oh my word, it's an amish man! What do you do for a living? Run a farm? Build wood houses?
I sell illegal guns to terrorists.
DOWN WITH AMISH DOWN WITH AMISH!
But... I conserve electricity!

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Oh my word! I hate the army! They cause all sorts of trouble and conflict with our Arabian friends!
The soldier shot Mark with a rocket launcher!
I hate hippies.

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
I love angels! They make the world so happy and.... uhm....
I'm sorry. I'm just so... um.... speechless yeah that's it I'm speechless in front of angels.
I get that alot.

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Oh my word! It's a female lifeform!
Oh my word! It's a male lifeform!
I guess I should say something.
I wonder if he's a vegetarian.
Why hello there.
Um hi. Let's have a vegetarian life together!

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
I love you.
The feeling is mutual.
Let's marry!
No.
Your kidding, right?

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Are you kidding?
No.
So does that mean we're married.
As long as I'm with you, Anna, I will resist the bad things in life like Adam Sandler or Eminem.
Oh Mark I love you!

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Hello I am your teacher and today you will learn how to make the best margaritas.
Uh sir?
What?
I think you are hammered.
Quite literally.

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Mommy how are babies made?
Let me put it in golf terms.
K.
You have to make the ball fit into the tiny little shaft.
In other words you put the dick in the vagina.
Yes.

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Uh mommy why are there strechy circly things on my bed?
Uh...
DId Mark come over again?
Uh...
No wait I can explain! Those circly things are uh... magical time portals!

 

by crazymalicous
6-18-05
Hi Frank! What's the matter?
Mommy had sex with Mark!
And how did you learn about sex?
Uh... Mommy taught me golf!

 

by crazymalicous
6-19-05
Hello welcome to Heart Attack Burger how may I help you?
You can't help me.
No one can help me either.
Let's be piss pals!

 

by crazymalicous
6-19-05
Hello bloke. Jolly good day we're having, eh?
Rightio!
What do you know, it's tea time!
Rightio!
Tally ho, tea!
Kaboodles!

 

by crazymalicous
6-19-05
Hello. My name is Spank. I am a monkey.
I have lots of adventures.
This one sucks.

 

by crazymalicous
6-19-05
Why am I in jail?
All I did was bite the mailman's pants off...

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