people mmyers is following

AccentuateNegative, alcoac14, andydougan, asween, AtheistDiary, attitudechicka, BigEvilDan, biped, boinky33, boorite, Capt_Shiddy, Chi_The_Cynic, choadwarrior, Choobychooby, CHUBBY, Cre8tive13, CrunchyCheese, dcomposed, DestroyAllTacos, DexX, eponine, EvilZak, Ewwwww, Externalization, Inflatable_Man, itsclark, ivytheplant, JESUSSANDWICH, jes_lawson, jools, Kaddar, KajunFirefly, kattheworld, kaufman, KungChiFu, little_kitty, lukket, Matchbook_Romance, matclarke, MikeyG, Mister_Owens, nicejohnson, niteowl, not_Scyess, ObiJo, PhreakyChinchilla, pita, possums, Rabid_Weasle, SpideyChris, squidrabies, TheBlairZip, TheGovernor, thochaos, umfumdisi, UnknownEric, wirthling

latest comics from people mmyers is following

by choadwarrior
I haven't seen you in a while.
I'm kid-proofing the house.
I see.
I'm going to have a three year-old here for the weekend.
Really? Whose?
I haven't decided yet.

by choadwarrior
California has a new law that lets people eat their own road kill.
You know what that means, right?
We're having Homeless Dude tonight!

by choadwarrior
Jesus? Party of 13?
Right here. Hey, it’s been a long day and we are in a bit of a rush. Can you send over a bunch of bread and wine right away?
Sorry, sir, we missed our delivery and are out of both tonight.
Fuck me. Well, we’re all here, so I guess you’ll just have to improvise.
These chips are my body—munch of them. This beer is my blood—chug of it.

by kaufman
I usually love the food at this place, but it's bland and tasteless tonight.
I was just thinking that. Hang on wait a minute ...
... There. Have a taste now.
Ah. Much better. What did you do?
Sorry, my fault. I had my phone in Airplane Mode.

My hotel in Italy comped me a full body massage.
From a man or woman?
Short, round, hairy Italian dude.
How did you keep from getting a boner?
I closed my eyes and pictured a short, round, hairy Italian dude.

by kaufman
........ 1) Give them a good meal before
having your way with them.
2) Don't skimp on the foreplay!

by kaufman
Y'know, Dave, you'll probably do a lot better if you hit the ball with an actual golf club, instead of that guitar.
You're missing the point, Bob. It's so beautiful here in Tehran, I want to be out on the course all day. If I shoot 500, so what?
Ok, whatever you s... hey, where'd you go?
Mr. President! I just heard another tanker was lost in the Persian Golf.
Great. I'll go on Twitter and blame it on immigrants.

by kaufman
Want some candy?
What do you think?
Ewwwwwww! This tastes like monkey brains!
Well, of course it does. These are Rhesus Pieces.

by UnknownEric
Doc put my nuts in a box
I like to eat socks
I'll go 1-8-7 on a mutha****in' fox

by squidrabies
It's been a while, huh?
I heard you stabbed a nun.
I heard you were a nosy *****.

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