people niteowl is following

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latest comics from people niteowl is following

Fine, fine!! We'll bring your cat some Jameson!
Well it's a little late for that now.
by evil_d, 4-22-14

by choadwarrior
Where were you earlier? We've been at this bar for hours.
Easter dinner at my parents' house.
You're the least religious person I know. What do you care about Easter?
I don't.
But my dad invites me every year because he thinks I'm the son of God.

by choadwarrior
Your other grandma isn't doing so well.
Your sister is going to fly to Kansas to see her before she dies.
Are you trying to guilt me into doing the same thing?
No, I told her if she just waits two more weeks, she'll only have fo go back for the funeral.

by choadwarrior
I always forget what we're supposed to do for Easter dinner...
Do we go around the table and make everyone say what they are thankful for?
No, that's Thanksgiving.
Then what do we talk about?
We say what we'd most like to come back from the dead.

by HCRoyall
Man, what a rough day.
Yeah, but at least you caught those problems before that plane took to the air again.
Yeah, with all those problems 370's going to be grounded for a while. Thanks for filling out the paperwork while I was getting my tools.
370? I thought you said 730...

So, it didn't work out, eh?
Yeah, in the end I guess we were attracted to each other, but just not compatible.
Like guns and Florida.
Like dancing and alcohol.
Like toilet seats and crabs.
Like Buicks and handicapped placards.

by choadwarrior
Hey! I was just about to come see you. Can we go to your office and talk?
Why not?
Somebody farted in there.

by TheGovernor
God damn it, I just got back from heaven and that was Mickey Rooney, the boss was not impressed
You must have misheard, I'm Jim Hellwig, also known in the Wrestling circuit as 'The Ultimate Warrior', see here's my id.
Ok that checks out I guess I'll be on my way.
Let me get this straight, Mickey Rooney I could understand, but you're telling me you couldn't tell the difference between a professional wrestler and a 93-year-old actor?

by TheGovernor
Abe Vigoda, it's time to meet your maker
You've got the wrong man, I'm.... Mickey Rooney, Yeah Mickey, that's it! IMDB must have our photos mixed up.
My mistake, sorry for scaring you.
No problem Death, happens all the time, like two peas in a pod me and Mick.. I mean Abe.

You're clean, right?
But you probably should have asked before you screamed, "I want your **** in my ass, now!"
Cool...good night.

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