people skagg is following

apejuice, boorite, DexX, fuck, gabe_billings, Graehe, kaufman, nailbunny, NastyPope, Spankling, squidrabies, vichyssoisegirl, wirthling

latest comics from people skagg is following

page 2

by kaufman
Hi mom.
Look at you! Have you put on a few pounds?
360 days a year:
And don't forget to be sure to get some exercise. You need to stay in shape!
Ok, I will, mom.
But on the eve of the big snowstorm ...
For god's sake, don't shovel the driveway yourself. You'll kill yourself! Find someone to do it.

by kaufman
I'd like a Big Mac, a medium fries, and to drink just a glass of water ...
Sorry, all we have is leaded.

by kaufman
Did you hear Glenn Frey died?
Oh no! What happened?
They said it was a combination of rheumatoid arthritis, acute ulcerative colitis and pneumonia.
Bummer. I hadn't heard about the arthritis and the pneumonia ...
... but I can't be surprised about the other factor. There was always that warm smell of colitis rising up through the air.

by kaufman
The Big Short was one of the most thought provoking films of the year. It reminds me of Waiting for Godot.
the truth is like poetry ...
That's the one where the characters spend all their time wiaitng for this Godot dude to show up, and he never does. This one was kind of like the same.
and most people ...
I kept waiting to find out who the title character would be. Herve Villechaize? Billy Barty? Verne Troyer? I guess we'll have to shell out for the sequel to find out.
... hate poetry.

by kaufman
Hey Vic, are you in here? Vic ? Where the hell are you?
I'm in here, coach!
Well, come on, get the hell out of there! It's your turn to bat. And stay out of the damn labyrinth!
I can't! My zipper is stuck to the wall!
I don't believe what I just saw. Ladies and gentlemen, Vic Wertz's fly was somehow caught by maze!

by kaufman
I'm going to be frank with you. It's the holiday season, and everyone wants that special something.
But if you see a deal that looks too good to be true, it probably is.
So if someone offers you a pre-release copy of "Star Wars Episode VIII: The Force Says Fuck It and Goes Back to Bed", don't buy it. It's a fake!

by kaufman
Any problems, John?
Heck no. Secret Service must have been partying again. I just walked in the door..
And then the dude didn't even look up from the show he was streaming. I just stepped up behind him and blew his brains out.

by kaufman
... and because it was Giving Tuesday, I spent a few hours donating to all sorts of charitable causes. How about you?
Hell no. I don't donate on Giving Tuesday, and I don't do special shopping on Small Business Saturday or Cyber Monday. I spend my money when and how I choose ...
But ...
... not as the social mediocrities proclaim. Speaking of which, did you hear that some people on Twitter have declared today Dieday the Thirteenth?

by kaufman
Class, this is a cemetery. Long ago, people would bury their dead in places like this and put up large stones to mark their locations.
There's writing on those stones.
Yes, people would leave messages on them telling about the deceased. Like "Edna Robinson, loving wife and mother". Or this one ... oh my god, that is so sad!
Why? What does it say?
Here lies Melvin Lee. Died one day before the discovery of the secret to immortality.

by kaufman
Last night I had the worst Thanksgiving dinner ever.
It was over at George the Animal Steele's house and he served a turducken.
Wow! That's exquisite. I wish I could have been there.
Did I mention that this was at George the Animal Steele's house? He cooked a chicken inside a duck inside a turnbuckle.

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