Philosopher Squirrel by unstableursine3-10-02 I am but a squirrel. That's easy for you to say! What? Oh, I just... never mind.
Philosopher Squirrel II by unstableursine3-10-02 What were you originally? Whaddaya mean? I mean... You're ashes, but ashes of what, exactly? Oh... Huh... I guess I never really thought about it before. Well, maybe you better start. Alright, I give up! You broke me! I was an avocado.
Philosopher Squirrel III by unstableursine3-10-02 *You* were an avocado? Yeah, so? How'd you get burnt? Let's just say I wasn't the freshest avocado in the fruit bowl. ... Was that a metaphor? What? No.
Philosopher Squirrel IV by unstableursine3-10-02 Wait... Is an avocado even a fruit? Why wouldn't it be? I thought it was a vegetable. Hm... Maybe it's both. Like a tomato. A tomato isn't both. A tomato is a fruit. You lie like a rug. Now *that* was a metaphor!
Philosopher Squirrel V: The Cliff-Hanger by unstableursine3-10-02 "You lie like a rug" is a simile, not a metaphor. ... You always have to be right, don't you?! Yes. Yes, I do. And a tomato is a fruit. Whatever. I'm leaving.
Philosopher Squirrel VI- Bezerker Chris Interlude by unstableursine3-10-02 As if from nowhere, the chilling Bostonian rocker appears. Yo. I be the Bizzay-erker. Is that a baby? No, it's a viola. Don't bring the strings section into this!
Philosopher Squirrel VIII- The Struggle Of Faith by unstableursine3-14-02 Thank Krishna! That was an uncomfortable series of moments. Oh wait... I'm an atheist. Damn.