people winkingjesus is following
Disco_Jesus, FlamingJesus, Injokester, JESUSSANDWICH, JesusWasMyMother, Jesus_on_a_stick, Jesus_Sweets, masturbatingjesus, mysticaljesus, NastyPope, NooniePuuBunny, pumpaction_jesus, SweetZombieJesus, theReverend, wildjesus
latest comics from people winkingjesus is following 
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| I hate to tell you this Ben, but legally we do own you, and have every right to keep you nailed here to this cubicle. | |
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| What? Why? Because I'm black?!? | |
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| Nope, we slipped a clause in the fine print of your contract. Won't hold up, of course. At least not once you complain to the proper authorities. | |
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| Okay Sanderson, the company is bleeding money due to employee hand-holding. We need a slogan to promote self-sufficiency. | |
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| No good, if we don't provide training the staff will hold the company accountable. | |
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| Hmmm. How about "Teach a man to Google how to fish," | |
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| "And you'll find out if he deserves to eat." | |
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| Bad news Chen, coffee will no longer be free in this office. From now on you'll have to get my refills from the company across the street. | |
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| But I can't get into their building without a pass, they have security. | |
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| Yes, but only on the first floor. | |
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| Now where do I get a form to requisition a hang-glider? | |
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| Did you know that Carl Sagan smoked cannabis? | |
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| Carl Sagan? A pot-head? If he was burning brain cells and still that smart, how many brain cells did that man have? | |
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| As you consult your "God", I shall consult the flying spaghetti monster. | |
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| See what I did there? I made a snarky comment to make you feel inferior about your personal choices. | |
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| Ask your flying spaghetti monster why I should give a **** and why you're an insufferable *******. | |
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Meanwhile: above all existence and knowledge....
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| I gave birth to myself so I could have a mirror, and then Sophia goes and creates something without me. How could it get any worse? | |
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| HEYYYY ALL-IN-ALL! I GOTS NADS ON MY FACE!! | |
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...and this is how Ignorance came into the world.
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| NADS! NADS! NADS! NADS! NADS! SAY IT WITH ME! | |
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| Well Chen, is everything in place to be rid of these wretched koala bears? | |
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| Yes sir, but I really must protest that... | |
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| Nonsense Chen, release the Koala-Eating Baboons! | |
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| Sir, if you will just listen for a few moments I can point out that... | |
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| And prepare the Baboon-Eating Giant Squid and reverse scuba equipment! | |
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| The koala bears are disgusting Chen, I think they're defective. See what you can do with the warranty or a return of some sort. | |
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| I don't think there's much we can do there sir, they didn't some from a store. | |
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| In fact you had me go on a 3 month safari to Australia in order to capture them and smuggle them back into the country. | |
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| Ah yes, I do recall a requisition order for a shipping crate of some sort. | |
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| And you sent me 36 ultra-large condoms and a tube of lubricant, that's correct. | |
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| Chen, this rat infestation is getting out of control. | |
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| Those aren't rats sir, they're koala bears. | |
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| Why the hell are there koala bears all over the office Chen? | |
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| It was your idea sir, you felt it would improve moral to introduce some "fluffy critters" | |
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| Well these ones aren't fluffy, they're greasy and smell of their own expulsions. I want them gone! | |
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| By that logic we also need to get rid of the IT department. | |
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| Hey Gene, what do you get if you cross motor oil, a bag of prunes and 2 kittens? | |
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| But whatever it is, there's about a litre of it in your blender. | |
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