Right, then. I've got all six rules, and it looks like they can all be used together. Thanks to the contributors (someone has to thank you, because it won't be the finalists).
Final Round: Drexle vs. NastyPope
1. At least one frame must take place in the year 1969. [Spankling] (I guess it's okay if only one side of a panel with the splitter background takes place in that year, but I don't even know why you'd do that.)
2. The comic must contain a popular television commercial or advertising catchphrase, like "Oh, what a feeling!" or "Finger licking good." [LadyJ]
3. Neal (from When I Grow Up) must appear at least twice. [crabby]
4. Take a well-known historical event, and change one of the circumstances surrounding it. Write what happens instead. [kaufman] (So as not to make things too difficult, your comic need not actually depict the altered event itself. But we definitely have to see some of the ramifications of the change. We need to know what happened differently, and how the world turned out differently because of it.)
5. Include a reference to a tea party (preferably the "little girls in dresses" kind, not the "dress up like indians and throw tea into the boston harbor" kind). [descolada99]
6. One character must have given up his (or her) left nut for something. [skagg]
This is for all the marbles, folks. Once someone gets five votes for a legal strip, he is victorious, and wins the admiration of millions, plus the right to moderate the next Comic Cup. Good luck to both contestants. Now make us laugh.
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!