CC 225: Nine drummers dumbing by areallystupidguy 12-21-03

what do you call someone who hangs around musicians? A DRUMMER! what did the drummer get on his IQ test? DROOL! whats the best way to get easy handicap parking? PUT DRUMSTICKS ON YOUR DASHBOARD! what do you call 12 drummers at the bottom of the ocean? A GOOD START! ...i totally hate all of you. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A DRUMMER AND A DRUM MACHINE? YOU ONLY HAVE TO PUNCH INFORMATION INTO THE MACHINE ONCE! HAHAHA.

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It's grime time.

Eight Maids-a-Milking ... by kaufman 12-22-03

... these jokes totally dry. scrubby, scrubby, fi dollah! All your broom are belong to us. So I says, "Well, them electric vacuums ain't gonna clean carpets by themselves." _____________ Ha, ha. _____________ What the fuck are you talking about? Need more suds on me. RAAAAR! DIAM WILL BROOMSTICK YOU!!! mop.

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me ... by kaufman 12-22-03

... Nine drummers drumming. BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BADOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BADOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BADOOM-BOOM-BOOM rat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tat-tat-rat-a-tat-a-tat BOOM-chuck-a-luck-a-BOOM-chuck-a-luck-a-BOOM-chuck-a-luck-a- I thought there were supposed to be twelve today. There were, but Keith Moon and the two guys from Spinal Tap spontaneously combusted.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

On the 2nd day of Christmas, Grandma got for me... by mmyers 12-22-03

What did you get me, grammy, what'd you get me? Oh, I got you two turtle necks. Again? I got the black ones like you like. Now how the hell am I going to get that partridge out of the pear tree?

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

CC 225: On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my PayPal sent to me by jes_lawson 12-22-03

"Dear PayPal... I think there's been some kind of mix-up. So far, over the twelve days of Christmas, I've received... 12 drummers, 22 sets of bagpipes, 30 frisky lords, 36 dancing girls... 40 milkmaids, 42 swans, 42 geese, 40 rings, 36 calling-birds, 30 hens, 22 doves, and 12 partridges in pear trees. Either you've made a big mistake, or I'm gonna have to ask the Stripcreator users to start sending cash donations only. Sincerely, Brad"

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

So far we do not have a rules-compliant 11th day of Christmas. I liked EvilZak's, but let me clarify something in the rules for you. We are going to post one of each of the days of Christmas to make a complete series, which is why serieses weren't allowed. Those will be your ultimate honorable mentions. From that series, one selected will be the winner. Merry Christmas!

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Mediocrity at its most average.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

CC 225: A Cartridge in a Bare Me by MikeyG 12-22-03

Hey, babe! What did you get me for Christmas? Actually, I'll tell you, because that's not the surprise. Ok, I guess. What is it? It's Super Mario Bros. 3 for your old Nintendo sytem. Cool! Can I see it? Sure, bubba. You've just got to figure out where I hid it.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

CC225: Four Falling Turds by MikeyG 12-22-03

Ow! Something just hit me in the head! Ow! What the hell just landed on me? Eewww! What just landed on my shoulder? Aaargh! Did something just shit on my head? ...And Santa congratulated me with some of those cookies he always gets. Holy shit, you hit 4 in a row? That's gotta be a record or something.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

CC225: Eleven Pipers Piping by MikeyG 12-22-03

Dooooo do do da doooooo da doo doo doooooooo! Da deeeee dee dooo da doo da doooooooo da doo doo doooooooooo! Excuse me, what happened to your pipe and the other ten pipers? They stole my pipe, went to Christina Aguilera's Christmas Orgy, and came down with Galactic Gonorrhea.

Also, on the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

CC 225: Eleven Diapers Wiping by MikeyG 12-22-03

Hey, Rumsfeld, yer plan to clone Elian Gonzales fer a public relations coup worked. My question is who's gon' change the other six littl'uns?

I'm particularly proud of the first two, and I posted TWO eleventh day comics, chicka!

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

On the twelfth day of Christmas Chicka got the news by kaufman 12-22-03

Sextuplets? No, but you're on the right track. Try multiplying by two.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

What the Six Geese are really doing by DrPedantic 12-22-03

Laying ................................ Leiing I'm almost done building this brick wall. Aloha! Welcome to Hawaii. Leiaing ................................ Lying Help me, Obi-Wan. You're my only hope. I am a swan. Lyeing ................................ Lawying I'm prepareing lutefisk for our holiday feast. Ambulances! I must chase them!

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Get it right!

Who? Me Bitter? by kaufman 12-23-03

On the third day ere Christmas, my tru e love gave to me: A life, so I didn't make comic 200,000.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

I haven't read all the entries yet, so I apologize if kaufman already beat me to it. (I also apologize for errors in content -- football ain't really my thing...)

Swann's a-Swimmin'! by flickguy 12-23-03

Lyn! Lyn, you get your ass back here! I ain't through talking to you yet! Must... keep... swimming... Feel myself... sinking.... You're fired! And once again, the Dolphins sack the Steelers Quarterback...

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This is not my empire.

5 Golden Teeth, buh-bump-bump-bump by mmyers 12-23-03

Damn straight, foo'. This is called being G'd up from the feet up. And them maids a milking and them geese a laying better have my money.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

hippies buy me beer on christmas! by xxausrottenxx 12-23-03

on the 11th day of christmas, there were 11 pipers piping the 11th day.... ok, the other 9 still think were in mexico, break out the pipes we piped them already....what should we do now whoa... theres the liqour store, and this time remember that sanitary napkins and vodka arent the same thing, please

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xx( o Y o. )xx

CC225: Eleven Pimpers Pimping by TheGovernor 12-24-03

Yo, Bitch, get back in there, and start shaking your thing, I aint paying you to stand around Yo My Brother! Hey, its Five Dollar for the regular service, but you going to have to dip into the green if you want something a bit special, you dig? Yo guys, Eleven Pimps working the same stretch aint good for business. I know the Republicans are throwing a party in town, but this is overkill! Get your Fat asses here, yo Im talkin about the biggest mama's you'll ever meet, for all you fat friends out there. Hey, where are those two asian girls I hired yesterday? Yo Clive you better not be pinching my girls again...

Six Geeks a geeking by mmyers 12-24-03

Come back here, you little dickens. Nooo waaaayyy. Says here, "Bite head off chicken and repeat." Sounds easy enough. Pickard is clearly the superior captain. ROFL LOL! Kirk was a thinking man's captain. Remember what he did with that lizard guy in episode #37?

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

(With apologies to mmyers, whose 6th day title gave me the idea for this strip.)

Six Geeks a-Slaying by flickguy 12-24-03

So I rolled a 20. Is that good? Dude, that's like a critical hit! You can add 500 to your damage roll! And my level 25 druid totally wiped out a whole party of evil progressive republican types trying to destroy the forest for their own nefarious plots and plans... You should team up with my level 30 barbarian warlord and help him in his quest for vengeance against the king who killed his brother's neighbor's cousin's evil twin! Okay, so where's this treasure you promised? We killed the orc horde... Well yah, but we haven't even SEEN the dragon's nest yet...

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This is not my empire.

CC 225: Five Onion Rings by Xuanwu 12-24-03

All right, there are five onion rings and six of us. I get one because I'm cool. First four to wave their hands get the rest. Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! ...Bugger.

"Five onion rings" comes from Garfield's "12 Days" parody.

Here they are, the winners of each numbered catagory:
These double as your honorable mentions, so feel honored.

On the 12th day of Christmas, my true strippers gave to me and kitty:

CC 225: On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my PayPal sent to me by jes_lawson 12-22-03

"Dear PayPal... I think there's been some kind of mix-up. So far, over the twelve days of Christmas, I've received... 12 drummers, 22 sets of bagpipes, 30 frisky lords, 36 dancing girls... 40 milkmaids, 42 swans, 42 geese, 40 rings, 36 calling-birds, 30 hens, 22 doves, and 12 partridges in pear trees. Either you've made a big mistake, or I'm gonna have to ask the Stripcreator users to start sending cash donations only. Sincerely, Brad"

CC225: Eleven Pimpers Pimping by TheGovernor 12-24-03

Yo, Bitch, get back in there, and start shaking your thing, I aint paying you to stand around Yo My Brother! Hey, its Five Dollar for the regular service, but you going to have to dip into the green if you want something a bit special, you dig? Yo guys, Eleven Pimps working the same stretch aint good for business. I know the Republicans are throwing a party in town, but this is overkill! Get your Fat asses here, yo Im talkin about the biggest mama's you'll ever meet, for all you fat friends out there. Hey, where are those two asian girls I hired yesterday? Yo Clive you better not be pinching my girls again...

CC 225: Ten Lords A-leaping by BigEvilDan 12-20-03

Pull! Wheeeeeeeee! (*BANG!!!*)

CC 225: Nine drummers dumbing by areallystupidguy 12-21-03

what do you call someone who hangs around musicians? A DRUMMER! what did the drummer get on his IQ test? DROOL! whats the best way to get easy handicap parking? PUT DRUMSTICKS ON YOUR DASHBOARD! what do you call 12 drummers at the bottom of the ocean? A GOOD START! ...i totally hate all of you. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A DRUMMER AND A DRUM MACHINE? YOU ONLY HAVE TO PUNCH INFORMATION INTO THE MACHINE ONCE! HAHAHA.

H8 Maids A-Milking by niteowl 12-20-03

Those damn maids...can't they be more gentle with our udders? Wanna know how you get 'em back? Flatulence.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

7 kaufmans punning by ObiJo 12-20-03

Why does it say "7 kaufmans"? I only see 5. I guess we're a little short. ____________ Indeed.

What the Six Geese are really doing by DrPedantic 12-22-03

Laying ................................ Leiing I'm almost done building this brick wall. Aloha! Welcome to Hawaii. Leiaing ................................ Lying Help me, Obi-Wan. You're my only hope. I am a swan. Lyeing ................................ Lawying I'm prepareing lutefisk for our holiday feast. Ambulances! I must chase them!

(Sorry kitty, I believe this one is much better)

CC 225: Five Golden Rings To Rule Them All by BigEvilDan 12-20-03

Look Frodo, there's a gift to you from Sauron. It's not another cursed ring, is it? Yeah, Merry, Pippin, and I each got one too. Man, they're so tacky. Maybe we should return them? Oh no. Don't you remember the crowds last time?

CC 225: Four Calling Birds by kaufman 12-20-03

Can you hear me now? Can you hear me now? Can you hear me now? Can you hear me now?

CC225: Three French Hens by TheGovernor 12-21-03

Bonjour! Ca Va! Actuallee, I come from Belgium!