This is a thread where you can post all those juicy little tidbits that doesn't really fit anywhere else, even in Announcements. I'll start off:

I have never, ever wished I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner but I wouldn't mind being a ceiling fan.

Sometimes at night I wish I had a really moist brownie instead of bed.

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

I let my dog hump my leg, but the bitch still gets angry when I hump her leg. What gives?

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

sometimes in the small hours of the night i wish i had been born around 850 AD or so somewhere in norway.
i wish i'd been a viking.
then i realize that if i'd had a catastrophic back injury like i did in real life that i woulda been a heimnar, living my useless life in shame and scorn and that my only hope of getting into vahalla would've been for my steading to get raided and for me to have been able to strangle one of my attackers with a loop of my own intestine before i succumbed to death.

plus, i enjoy air conditioning way too much.

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Kill Whitey.

If I could be any comic book hero, I'd be Nightwing.

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I has a flavor!

MY SHAMEFUL PAUL REVERE ANECDOTES

I once cut a fart so incredibly rank that it travelled back in time and knocked Paul Revere off his horse.

I once travelled back in time to the Revolutionary War, and when Paul Revere came riding by shouting "The British are coming! The British are coming!" I yelled back, "Then tell 'em to stop jackin' off!!! LOL!!!!1!"

I once met a person who proudly claimed to be a direct descendant of Paul Revere, and I said, "Wow! So, are you a huge fucking fag, too?"

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

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I once met a person who proudly claimed to be a direct descendant of Paul Revere, and I said, "Wow! So, are you a huge fucking fag, too?"

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I once shot a man in Reno just for snoring too loud. He woke up and was all like, "What the..?" but then I threw a knife thru his neck and he was teh killzord.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

i threw up Jimmy Hoffa and then broomed him discretely under the rug with the side of my shoe

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what if nigger meant kite

The superhero I most dream of myself as is Superman.

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

Turns out I'm now being extorted by aryan gangsters and I'm probably going to have to kill myself. Or someone is talking big shit and is going to die. We'll see which is true in the next couple of days.

I read erotica in barnes and noble (aloud)

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possible savior probable SEX MACHINE

The superhero I think of myself as is NFL Superpro!

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

I was the first woman ever to fly a helicopter upside-down.

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What others say about boorite!

I would be in a Girls Gone Wild video for the right price.

I'm probably going to get a sex change by the time I turn 30.

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It's grime time.

So would I.

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I has a flavor!

I slept in a homemade muscle shirt last night.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

you did not!

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obscenity filter is off

When I was an intern in the White House, I sucked of George W Bush while he penetrated me with a dildo-shaped bible.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

I'm probably going to bust your trans-cherry.

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What others say about boorite!

The highlight of my day is when I finish a bag of David's jalapeno salsa sunflower seeds and get to lick my finger and stick it into the bag picking up and remaining artificial flavoring then aforementioned finger into my mouth.

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obscenity filter is off

I'm very proud of this:

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Dinosaurs had eggs bro, the chicken came way later.

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I'm very proud of this:

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I'm very proud of this:

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