So last night there was a big finals game or something and the town decided the best thing to do last night was be complete retards. I'm sure there was lots of things going on around town. The retardation at our section of town was fun. At the bar on the next block, there was some loud live music playing around midnight and, as usual, the street is parked up with hooligans. And, as usual, they all park in front of our driveway, blocking the car in.
Last time, this silver SUV not only blocked the driveway, but parked up on the grass, just barely missing getting ticketed for blocking the sidewalk. But this time was even more priceless.
Now, I've given out a large number of warnings to people doing this. I started out nice, went to straightforward, and then threatening. I'm guessing they didn't really care if I couldn't get out of the driveway as long as they got away with it.
They didn't this time.
About 5am, there was a silver Volvo sedan parked in front of the driveway. So I called and had them ticketed. I wrote down the license plate number so if they do it again, they get their asses towed. A couple hours later, I went outside and discovered the silver SUV (same one I warned before) that was previously legally parked on the street behind the Volvo decided that the best thing to do was to pull up and take the Volvo's space, blocking my driveway. I called to have the fucker towed, but relented and only had him ticketed. If the ticket doesn't work, next time he'll get towed.
But my favorite part is that the complete moron pulled up to take the Volvo's illegal space. That level of retardation is amazing. And it couldn't have been someone who went to the bar, got drunk, and then crashed at someone's house nearby. No one I've ever known that goes drinking til 2am would get up at 7am on a Sunday just to move their car one space over. Especially since the SUV had been there for a while. Maybe they were high, who knows. Maybe just stupid.
While I was calling dispatch, the hot blonde in the silver Volvo came back. Turns out she lives at the other end of our block, across the street from a section of street that NEVER has cars parked there. I hope she has a hangover.
And before you think I'm this massive bitch that should chill out and stop having people ticketed who are only having some harmless fun on a Saturday night, I don't fucking care if they park in our yard as long as the driveway isn't blocked and I'm fucking sick of being accomodating. This happens almost every weekend and I'm sick of not being able to pull into or out of the driveway if I need to. These assholes get off because I've been nice in only warning them, and in the meantime, if I have to park across the street because the driveway's blocked, I'd get the pleasure of having my car marked for tow (24 hour ordinance that the bitch residents enforce to the point of cops back dating the stickers so vehicles can be towed sooner).
You should see our collection of those stickers.
Anyway, I'm sick of being nice and I no longer care if these assholes have to get their cars out of impound. If they weren't so fucking retarded in the first place, and listened when warned in the second place, then there wouldn't be a problem.
Sorry, I had to get that out some way and I didn't think it would work as a comic. Okay, so I could make a comic out of it, but I still needed to scream about it. You know, I should try out my new window punches on these cars...
[Click to view comic: 'Another Sunday Morning in Idiotville']