any suggestions on where to use it?

Get a snappy tux and a Walther PPK to go with it.  Then hit some exotic locale known for international crime and espionage such as Monte Carlos or the Riviera.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

An Airport.

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Poo perhaps?

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...and if you liked that one, here's a link to my other stupid shit.

Beautiful Cleveland, Ohio!

I can almost guarantee that you probably won't get mugged very badly.

We have museums.

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Kill Whitey.

You could wedge it under your 8-track tapes so they don't drag.  Or, if you don't wear gloves, you could slap people with it when you challenge them to a duel.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

You should go to El Salvador!  It's very scenic with all the volcanoes, they have mayan ruins, its not very dangerous, pretty stable govt, they've adopted the US dollar as their currency, and the food is just plain great!! I wish I could go :( I haven't been in over 10 years.

My go-to response here is Easter Island. It truly is the perfect get-away-from-it-all destination. The plane ticket is murder, but once there, the rates are fine. It's worthwhile planning a week or two. You can see the entire island five times over in a very leisurely way, and spend the rest of the day relaxing and talking to the nice people.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

I just got back from Costa Rica.  It was fun, and they take dollars in most places, but I don't know if I'd go if you don't speak Spanish.  Not that you can't get around -- you an get around fine with English -- but without being able to talk to everyone it's just another tourist destination.

My favorite destination is Japan, but I also enjoyed Poland.  (But in both places I was also with someone who spoke the language.)  This summer I hope to head out to Slovakia for an insanely cheap (in dollar terms) week at a spa.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

I've been to Nicaragua, so I've done the Central America thing (went to a wedding in the middle of nowhere and had jungle village hospitality--very cool).  I went to an active volcano that Somosa used to throw political prisoners into from helicopters.  We got chased away by a policeman and an American claiming to be a vulcanologist.  It's a funny story, but only when I tell it in person.  

Living a half hour from Mexico means I can speak enough Spanish to get by in most situations.

Here's the question I always have for people who tell me I should go to Costa Rica...what do you do there?  The answer I always get is, "It's nice."  Well, that doesn't answer the question, and any attempts to elicit a response just get more iterations of what a wonderful place it is, but never any explanation of what you'd do once you get in that eden.  

The most I've ever gotten was doing a zipline through the rain forest canopy.   I said, "That sounds like fun, what do you do the other six days you're there?"  

"It's nice."

Bah!  Real men use a reed boat built with their own two hands anyway.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

choadwarrior

Well, you don't NEED Spanish to get by in any situations.  Any situations you find yourself can be taken care of in Engilsh or at least via emphatic gesticulation.  The reason I suggested Spanish is so you could get to know the people down there, which would be fun.  I bet.

choadwarrior

That's consistent with my experience.  We didn't do anything.  We did the zipline thing (worth doing once but not going out of your way for) and we went fishing for mackerel, and the rest of the time we just hung around drinking muchas cervesas.    The purpose of the trip was for all of us to get together, not to have an adventure of a lifetime.  And you know what?  It was nice.

Actually, there was supposed to be great nightlife in nearby Jacó, but I wouldn't know since we pretty much didn't leave the house except for those two excursions above.

I'd still recommend Poland or Japan.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Oh, you want to go someplace and do things?

Sydney, Australia. You've already missed the Pride Festival this year, but it will happen again next year. And Sydney's fun without it. 

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Australia has always seemed like America with accents to me.

But you live in SoCal... where America is America with accents.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

not_Scyess

¡Tienes razón!

"But you live in SoCal... where America is America with accents."

No, SoCal is America with plastic tits. 

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...and if you liked that one, here's a link to my other stupid shit.

Canada. I hear Vancouver is great this time of year.

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

Or, if you could manage to get another passport, then you'd have one to shit on, and one to cover it up with.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

umfumdisi

Hah. I was about to suggest the same thing.

Sure, Vancouver/Vancouver Island are nice around this time (especially post-Olympics), but why not adventure to Sunny Saskatchewan? You'll get to see absolutely nothing, pay an outrageous amount for fuel, and probably get stabbed by "Native Canadians"! Hot dog, that sounds like a real holiday!

Personally, I would probably head to Eastern Canada. In Ottawa, Toronto, and Montreal, they all have tons of stuff to do around this time of year. I would say head to the Maritimes, for all of the ridiculous culture out there, but they've been bombarded with weird weather and I wouldn't want you to get snowed on or rained out or anything. 

If not Canada, I say head to some Scandanavian countries... Finland, Norway, Sweden, etc etc. 

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

little_kitty

Hah. I was about to suggest the same thing.

Sure, Vancouver/Vancouver Island are nice around this time (especially post-Olympics), but why not adventure to Sunny Saskatchewan? You'll get to see absolutely nothing, pay an outrageous amount for fuel, and probably get stabbed by "Native Canadians"! Hot dog, that sounds like a real holiday!

Personally, I would probably head to Eastern Canada. In Ottawa, Toronto, and Montreal, they all have tons of stuff to do around this time of year. I would say head to the Maritimes, for all of the ridiculous culture out there, but they've been bombarded with weird weather and I wouldn't want you to get snowed on or rained out or anything. 

If not Canada, I say head to some Scandanavian countries... Finland, Norway, Sweden, etc etc. 

Like Denmark...

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troelsea at gmail dot com

lukket

Hah. I was about to suggest the same thing.

Sure, Vancouver/Vancouver Island are nice around this time (especially post-Olympics), but why not adventure to Sunny Saskatchewan? You'll get to see absolutely nothing, pay an outrageous amount for fuel, and probably get stabbed by "Native Canadians"! Hot dog, that sounds like a real holiday!

Personally, I would probably head to Eastern Canada. In Ottawa, Toronto, and Montreal, they all have tons of stuff to do around this time of year. I would say head to the Maritimes, for all of the ridiculous culture out there, but they've been bombarded with weird weather and I wouldn't want you to get snowed on or rained out or anything. 

If not Canada, I say head to some Scandanavian countries... Finland, Norway, Sweden, etc etc. 

Like Denmark...

I heard there was something rotten there...

Prague or Riga maybe? Depends what you're in the mood for.  

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

Go to Rio de Janeiro and see the 50 foot jesus lizard.  I don't know if he's real but I know somebody who says they saw them feeding him.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

The Philippines.

:)

Save up money. Travel in August. Go to Edinburgh for the festival, then south to Mallorca for hot weather and beaches and everyone speaking English, and then go to Finland and find the ugliest woman there, and then realise she's sexier than anyone you've ever seen, and then fuck her, and then go to Bordeaux where everyone is nuts and have a lost weekend and then get the plane home.