evil_d
Riding through your town with his head on fire
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It has come to my attention that r2_d2's comics are underrated.
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| Why on Earth do you need so many identical red shoes? | |
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| They're not all red. These are burgundy, these are wine, and these are vermillion. | |
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| Did you really drink all this booze? | |
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| It's not booze. This bottle was burgundy, this one was wine, and this one was vermouth. Two can play at your little game. | |
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| Hey, tomorrow, could you go out and buy some turpentine-coloured shoes? | |
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| I need to pick up some balloons for a kid's birthday party and—holy shit, is that what I think it is? | |
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| You mean this American Soldier-shaped piñata? Good choice, it's one of our best sellers. | |
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| Are you actually suggesting hanging a depiction of a serviceman from a tree, and having children beat it with sticks? | |
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| Why? what's wrong with it? | |
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| Well, the birthday boy isn't Iraqi. | |
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| Look, just be patriotic and buy the damned effigy. | |
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| Suicide hotline, Jeff speaking. | |
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| I've got a problem here. I got fired eight months ago, and since the unemployment checks ran out, I still haven't found a job. | |
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| Well, sir, you have to understand that the economy's been hard for everyone— | |
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| —says the guy who's getting paid to answer the phone! I have no prospects. I went in to the garage and started up the truck. | |
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| Sir, I can't let you do this. I'm alerting the paramedics right now. | |
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| Yeah, well, call 'em off. With the price of gas these days, I couldn't build up enough exhaust to get the job done. | |
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--- The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!
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