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  thatsnotfunny  

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by thatsnotfunny
1-04-10
Though born genetically perfect, He won only a silver medal. Angered to not receive a gold one, He steppeth before a speeding car.
Did he rise up, unharmed?
Nay. Both His perfect legs were permanently lost. Dissatisifed with an earthly wheelchair existence, He then burneth himself in the incinerator.
What kind of savior is this bozo?
Before dying He sayeth: "Take of my hair and urine and blood. My DNA shall become your DNA, thus you will be an astronaut and lay with Uma Thurman."
I'm in.
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