All comics by GunnerBQ

Profile

 

by GunnerBQ
1-03-03
Santa makes first contact with Extra-Terrestrial life
Hat
Greetings earthling, we come in peace.
Santa isn't interested, he has far too many kids to keep happy
Hat..
Excuseme
...
Where's my fucking radish?
KILL

 

by GunnerBQ
1-03-03
hey man, i went water skiing the other day. I was like WOOO YEAH MAN!!
humahummahu..nrr..nrr.nrrnrnrrnrnrr
durdle
WOAH DUDE, HOW THE FUCK DID I GET HERE?!
you're fucking with my mind man, just...just...
dgher

 

by GunnerBQ
1-03-03
Barry sees something.
hmm
Are you a cat?

 

by GunnerBQ
1-03-03
Hi, my names Dalton and i've been gay for at least 13 years.
hmm, and why do think that is Dalton? Remember say whatever you feel, i'm only here to help you.
From an early age i found myself playing with Barbie dolls instead of the usual Action man macho figurines. I was persecuted and bullied at every single school i went to. I often cried myself to sleep
This is good, get it all off your chest. You've just got to remember there's absolutely nothing wrong with being homosexual.
Hey, you wanna have sex?
I see..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-03-03
Yep, i'm really gay. I don't know what to do. My name is Dalton and I'M GAY
Dalton..urr.. i mean Ed, your name is fuckin Ed.
Dalton's had enough of this world.
Your name's fuckin Ed
Pedant.
Jesus man, Ed's your fuckin name. Of course its got nothing to do with the creator forgetting stuff..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-06-03
oh..he's nice...
He's looking at me kinda funny.
I'm not gay
Sorry?
I SAID I'M NOT GAY

 

by GunnerBQ
1-06-03
POOF

 

by GunnerBQ
1-06-03
The Average Internet Conversation
Hey
Hey
k man, i gotta go
bye

 

by GunnerBQ
1-06-03
I don't understand it...
I followed the instructions..
WORK COMPUTER, WORK!!! FUCK YOU TO HELL!

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
Bastard needs some food. Only SuperComputerBoy can help him!
*CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP* HURRY UP MAN, I NEED TO EAT SOME MORE FUCKING FOOD!!
I'm trying. I'm trying, damn you
Fucker Monkey and Caffiene Boy try their best to thwart SuperComputerBoy..
Hurry up Caffeine Boy! We can't let him eat!
If i disable the super-shodulator.. surely he can't get more food.... WHAT?! Noooooooooooo
SuperComputerBoy saves the day.
*Chomp*
Yes! YES! I've got it Bastard, my friend! To the fridge!! The fridge has food, good food!!

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
SCBoy gets an unexpected visit..
Guhuhuhuhuh
Dad, why are you in here?
Once again Fucker and Caffeine Boy try their best to destroy SCBoy
YES! NOW IS OUR CHANCE! Keep his dad there Caffeine Boy!
He's..he's just to strong! I..can't..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
Bastard asks a question
Alright mate *CHOMP CHOMP* what you doing?
Just doing some homework, maths.
Bastard asks another question..
Oh, ok, is that why you're using the calculator?
Yeh, Bastard, thats why..
..As determined as ever..
Stop him you fool!
I can't!!

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
Bastard and SCBoy are going to the cinema
C'mon lets go, or we'll be late.
Yeah, hang on - i'll just shutdown.
Another dastardly plot from Fucker Monkey
Quick! Don't let him shutdown!!!! No no, on the other hand... yes! Shut him down Caffeine Boy!! YES, shut the computer down!HAHAHAHAH
OK.. now we're cookin'
And off they go... (see part 2)
Right, lets go.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
Victory!! ?
What...whats going on Caffeine Boy?! C'mon keep me informed!
I...i managed to shut his machine down..jesus..
The realisation begins to set in
You..you mean we did it? We defeated SCBoy???
YES! At last!!! HAHAHAHAH
World Domination is next, surely?
YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!! I, FUCKER MONKEY CAN NOW TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!
OK, this is brilliant. But now what?

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
Barry: If I could Walk with animals, Talk with the animals, grunt and squawk and fuck all the animals, And they could bugger meeeeeeeee
I've been singing that for 2 days now, i had to get it out
Bum bum bum bum bum BUMMMM, Bu bu BUM bum bum BUM! For so proudly bum bum... bum bum bum bum bum bum
and like magic, it should arrive
children
i'm wetting my boxers right this second

 

by GunnerBQ
1-07-03
My pulse pumps out a beat to the ghost dancer
My eyes are dead and my throats like a blackhole
And if there's a God, would he give another chancer an hour to sing for his soul?
My family don't seem so familiar, yet my enemies all know my name..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
Ollie, i have a probem.
Yeah everybody already knows Barry. Your parents are the only ones who don't know you fuck cats.
No, no, you're not listening to me. Listen to what I have to say. Listen to my problem.
Ok, but if it's anything to do with you fucking cats - stop right there, i know.
I fuck cats.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
Eddie?
No. I'm Julia.
I think i have a problem.
Ohhh, you're not Barry, are you?
I fuck cats.
Ah, hello Barry.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
I'll tell him about my problem..
Hi Barry
..i fuck cats... i fuck cats...i fuck cats...i fuck cats...i fuck cats...i fuck cats...
Why are you just...oh no, OH NO! Barry for fucks sake i know! You do not have to say it again! I KNOW!
I fuck cats.
ghkfjgfydfyjud

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
Hey, i'm Gay Ed. My name's Dalton. I'm not gay. Oh, hang on - I am.
Hey there - Crackhead Bunny's the name. I'll be having a telivisual molest-o-thon with Jeff later. Its all for Children in Need so send your donations NOW. Keep these kids alive people.
Hello there, i'm 'light fingered' Jeff. I'm not wearing any pants. But its for... work..yes
I'm not Jeffs lover..
Hi....I have a...
Its all over the fucking web man. I know.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
eddie's a pervert
yes he is
i mean, he can't go around bragging to people that he's not allowed within 3 miles of any primary school
no he shouldn't, but he does
hmm
i think him and Jeff still have feelings for one another. Forbidden feelings, some might say. With kindred spirits you never know. Oh by the way, i don't use protection. *MEOW*

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
Barry goes to the 'Clinic' in attempt to to cure his problem
Hi, i have this problem..
Is there hope for Barry?
I know my child, be silent. There is one, and only one way to cure you of this..this habit.
..I fuck cats... Ohhh really? How?
And so the quest begins..
My child, you must journey Hadakat and find a cat.Not just any cat,a cat with a mixed white and ginger coat, green eyes and a rather strange posture. From this day forth you will be known as Barry...
Barry The Cat Fucker?!! YES! SLAMDUNK! Ok, must be going..bye

 

by GunnerBQ
1-08-03
A few corrections my friends. Firstly, it should have said "journey to Hadakat".
I fuck cats. Secondly it should have been this background on the last frame. The creator was over-eager on clicking the Save button. I fuck cats.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
Barry begins his mission.
Hmm, if i'm to succeed in this quest, i think i'll need some help. Time to pick some members for my fellowship.
Ah, thats a coincidence!
He's sees Eddie..
Hi Eddie, will you join the Fellowship of the Cat and help me cure my cat-fucking problem?
What?
Later on..
Hi Ollie, will you join the Fellowship of the Cat and help me cure my cat-fucking problem?
No

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
Barry's superb powers of pursuasion (involving sodomy and sleep) eventually earn him a fellowship to be proud of.
Ok Ollie, are you ready for a trip of a life time? We're going to Hadakat don't you know.
Yes Barry. Hat.
Barry always comes prepared (excluding cat fucking days/nights)
How about you Eddie? All ready?
Urm, i'm not sure i should leave Jeff home alone... he urrr tends to bring even more people and things back when i'm not around..
The hero's set off on the heroic journey, almost
Right then, lets get going. I bet this quest will be a cat-fucking good time!
PLEASE stop inventing phrases, Barry.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
Our heroes really start the journey now. A long trek across the desert commences..
Ahhh i'm really thirsty!!
I've got some paper if you want some Barry.
Ungrateful cat fucker
No, i can't drink paper. Sorry. I think i'll just ask Eddie...
Ah
Barry jogs ahead and catches up with Eddie
Eddie, you got any bottles of water i could place my dry - but still luscious - lips around?
Barry, stop walking so close behind me.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
After a healthy dose of a desert-dwellers piss (he bought it for £44), Barry's thirst is quenched. The journey continues through the mountains..
Piss sweet piss..
*Retch*
Ollie makes a good observation.
Barry, surely a good first step in your cat-fucking cure would be to put that bloody cat down. No?
I'm afraid i can't do that Ollie. Besides, it was bleeding when i took....urm found it. Honestly.
Where will the quest take them to next?!
Oh look, a hat! ...i mean a cave!!
Yes, lets go in there... darkness is my best friend..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
The cave happens to be pitch black..
RELAX don't do it!
When you wanna suck to it!
RELAX don't do it!
When you wanna cum!!!
STOP SINGING THAT FUCKING SONG BARRY
Barry, you'll find you can move a lot quicker if you stand and get OFF THE FUCKING FLOOR!!

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
The Quest is temporarily delayed.... On a good note though - the caves still dark.
Ohh yeh, come to daddy..
Ohhhh.. oh yeah.. oh yeh
Ollie ponders..
What the hat are you doing Barry?!
NO, NO don't ask!! Do NOT ask!
..Sick..
Ohh fuck yea...
Nooo noo stay right there.. ohh

 

by GunnerBQ
1-10-03
The heroes make it through the cave of darkness unharmed, and free of any STD's.
He really can't control his urges can he?
Hell no.
What?! Not a cat.. never...
So what was it? A cat?
Nope, not this time. Take a look ahead. Barry wants to keep him.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-12-03
After covering much ground, Barry grows bored of Pedro - abandoning him, and our heroes seek shelter
Oh look, a house Barry! Urrr, a hat i mean. Noo..
Great, lets get inside.
Eddie, the voice of logic - speaks out
Urm, Barry.. thats the White House, i don't think we'll be allowed in.
Shhh!
Barry Fucks Cats
Barry, you go ahead and break into the hat somehow. Me and Eddie'll wait here.
Sounds good.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-12-03
After much planning Barry tries to break into the White House
Hiiii i'd like to stay here overnight please.
I'm afraid i can't let you do that sir....oh god, is that piss running down your leg?
Tells it like it is
Yes, i need to piss
I...
Barry Fucks Cats
I'll flick my foot towards you if you don't let me pass.
Ok man, take it easy...nice slow movements..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-14-03
After flick his foot at the guard, evading the dogs and breaking down the front door Barry makes it into the "hotel"
Damn, i really need to find us a good room.
After 5 minutes exploring Barry is surprised by the sudden appearance of one of the President's BG's.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
AAAAAAAAAA hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Hi i'd like a room with a view please.
Let go of the cat and put your hands above your head, very slowly.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-14-03
After being held at gunpoint , Barry is escorted off the grounds
I only went in his room because i wanted a fart!
Barry explains what had 'happened' to the rest of the fellowship..
I was fucking a cat in the corridor and then an alien came along and slapped me. So we can't stay in this hotel.. it has aliens.
Hi Eddie, i just fucked a cat.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
The heroes seek shelter elsewhere..
Barry, where the fuck are we going?
i fuck cats..
Pay attention, Cat Fucker
BARRY!
Urrrr..Just follow me...everythings going to be ok, baby
Barry Fucks Cats
Did he just call you baby?
Urmmm, he was talking to you..yes

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
Barry finds solace in a little girl's bedroom
Barry, why are we in this little girl's bedroom?
HHHAAHHAAHA
Barry Fucks Cats
You're sick.
HAHAHAHAHA
Barry Fucks Cats
Get you hands where i can see them Barry.
HAHAHHAHA I'm sleeping on the fucking bed

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
After Barry's good night sleep, a tired Eddie and Ollie (they didn't dare close their eyes) drag Barry out of the little girl's bedroom. The journey continues through the Tabby Forest.
I tell you, he has more than one problem..
He says he can't help it...why doesn't he just wear a belt?
Up ahead Barry sees a message so vital it could effect the course of the quest. Unfortunately it's tied to a cat..Barry conveniently reads the message aloud.
Message for Barry The Cat Fucker: Barry, you have done well for getting this far, but my child - you have a long way to go yet. Stay on this track and you will soon be there. Ps. Fuck this cat
Well.. i think i'd better do as it says....
Barry returns to his friends 20 seconds later to show them the message.
Barry, why is your handwriting scrawled at the bottom of this message?

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
Still travelling through the forest, Eddie's thoughts turn to home.
You know, i'm actually beginning to miss Jeff and all my handkerchieves. I've started licking my top lip again - non stop.
Hahahaha chapped lip! .....I miss my hats too. BUT i've got a keychain - it's all i'll ever need.
Having Jeff around makes me feel better about myself. The sooner this quest is over, the better. I just wanna go home.
..a nice hat..and some soup..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
The Fellowship has been fortunate so far..but now - as they pass through the grave yard - they face their first and possibly greatest enemy.
Hi, i have a problem.
Hello, i'm Jason Hayes. I fuck cats.
Is Barry going mad?
I fu...Jason..no, no..this..no..cats
What? Are you ok Barry?
I..ghost..I..I need to release some tension..
You're fucking weird.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
Making it through the graveyard, the other members of the Fellowship show they do care a little about eachothers welfare.
Does Barry seem to be getting odder to you?
Hat. I think i'll have a word with him now, it's getting rather worrying.
Ollie walks on to talk to Barry.
Hello, i'm Jason Hayes. I fuck cats.
!!
Nutter?
Barry! Listen for fuck sake! I'm showing an interest in your mental well-being here!
Oh no no no no...just go..please..I can't take this..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
Hello, i'm Jason Hayes. I fuck cats.
I..I..I...just..le...leave me alone..
Hello, i'm Jason Hayes. I fuck cats.
STOP HAUNTING ME! YOU'RE FUCKING ME UP!
Jesus, there's no helping some people..You're so fucking strange Barry.
**Cries**

 

by GunnerBQ
1-15-03
Barry recovers from the ghostly visits in his own special way.
Where's Barry?
He's been fucking that tree for half an hour now.
17 is the magic number
Oh, i spose it's like what they say about men in prison. They just make do with whatever..
Sicko.
10 minutes later Barry returns with an ashamed look on his face.
I still fuck cats you know. **Cries**
I know Barry, it's ok, don't worry, it's ok...Everythings going to be alright.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-16-03
Barry regains confidence in his manhood, and the Fellowship set off again. As they pass through a small town, Barry has second thoughts.
Hmm, i don't know if I really want to stop fucking cats...it brings me so much pleasure. Wouldn't I be silly to stop?
I'd be silly wouldn't I Eddie? I think we should turn back now...I like fucking cats too much.
Barry, if you turn back now you'll be fucking cats for the rest of your life. Do you really want to spend all those years roaming the streets, curb crawling for a stray?
No. I mean yes. I mean I can always fart in peoples' bedroom's when i'm bored. I can steal glasses too, so people won't be able to see properly! Then I can fuck their cats..ohh..
Barry...

 

by GunnerBQ
1-16-03
Hang on! That smell in my bedroom..a week ago..3 o clock in the morning..it was you..IT WAS FUCKING YOU!
Hrmphrmphrmp!!!
I heard a shuffling noise..it woke me up..i sat up, but by then you must've gone...you're so fucking weird.
HEHEHE IT WAS MY FARTY DANCE!! MY FARTY DANCE WOKE YOU UP!!! HAHAHAHAHA
Sometimes Barry - you scare me.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-16-03
After several more admissions from Barry (including how he has a special dance for just about everything involving his bottom), his loyal friends manage to forgive him and continue the journey.
Barry, I think we're in Hadakat now.
Barry..
Does this mean the quest is over?
Barry, I think we're in fucking Hadakat now!
Oh! Ohhh. I see.
So I spose this is where you lose your dirty little habit then?
No, this is where I get a cure to stop me fucking cats. I...I think i'd better go on alone now, this means a lot to me.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-16-03
So Barry sets off alone, in the hope of finding the cat that could possibly solve his 'problem'.
Here pussy pussy..here kitty kitty
Come on kitty, Barry's got a present for you..
So Barry takes out his 'present' and continues his search.
Come here, come to me, come right here - next to me, pussy. Ploosh ploosh ploosh.
Ploosh ploosh kitty
Barry promises me he thought she was cat..
Hi.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-16-03
I have a problem, I fuck CATS
For several reasons, the speech in this frame has been censored.
Habbaflappahabbaflappa?
Daddy, this man just asked me if i'd have sex with him.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-21-03
While Barry makes indecent proposals to young girls, Eddie and Ollie talk.
Eddie, I have something to tell you...I have a problem.
Ohh
Ollie has a problem.
I...I..I.....I..I.I..I...I...I...I
You..you..you?
Eddie has a problem.
I cut....I cut Jaffa cakes. I mean I don't work at a factory and cut the circle shape out...I actually cut them. With scissors.
I errrrr don't know what to say...Well I do actually..I have a little problem of my own..

 

by GunnerBQ
1-21-03
While Barry gets a dose of his own medecine (indecent assualt) from the girl's father, Eddie sheds more light on his problem.
So..so what's your problem?
I find it exciting to put several handkerchieves down my pants. They don't wriggle because they can't move. But I like to pretend they wriggle, you see.
..
After sitting down and standing up several times, I say the word 'nappy' 17 times, loudly. Then I remove the handkerchieves as quickly as possible.
Eddie..
Then I fold the handkerchieves.

 

by GunnerBQ
1-21-03
While Barry actually finds the special cat, Eddie and Ollie continue with their conversation.
Well...I have another problem, come to think about it...You know the Transformers?
Yeh, course, Optimus Prime and all them.
The thing is - I'm actually a Transformer.
..
Watch. Chochocho choo cho chee ch choo. Neek neek.

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