All comics by bencomic

 

by bencomic
7-15-07
My dad reckons that smart guys get all the chicks
your dad is delusional
My dad is a PhD
your dad is delusional
And is married to a Peruvian woman thirteen years his junior
can you say sexslave?

 

by bencomic
7-21-07
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
I ate to much today, and then I needed to go to the bathroom, and it was like BOOOM into the toilet.

 

by bencomic
9-01-07
zaphod's continuing downward spiral:
I keep confusing the hell out of my therapist.
I keep using words like "meatspace" and "code monkey"
breaking news:
ryo wears 80 pants
no i don't!!!!!!!!!!!
the hideous return of madbrain:
I wonder how you'll pull off the chessmaster 3000 porn
dude... queen with tower

 

by bencomic
9-01-07
MEANWHILE IN #MZX: frobozz
yeah, using "..." is pretty lame. I use a good ole wassup
W W A SS SS U U PP
W W A A S S U U P P
W W AAA S S U U PP
W W A A S S U U P
W A A SS SS U P

 

by bencomic
9-01-07
god why is it so hot in here
why... in poorly ventilated room with black painted walls in central phoenix... is it so hot.....

 

by bencomic
9-19-07
madbrain in jail
heh, I'm trying to come up with some sound change rules for producing the biggest vowel system ever
like, what would be cool is rules for turning a language with diphtongs and lots of end of syllable consonants and clusters, into a CV language
with a huge vowel inventory, nasalisation, stop-glide-vowel syllables (kya,kwa,etc..), and tone and/or length and OH GOD I'M BEING ANALLY RAPED

 

by bencomic
10-04-07
MEANWHILE IN #ZEUX:
i don't get paid until next week... but i want to buy portrait of ruin.
and.... more weed.... speaking of which........... (lights up)
I don't want anything that messes with my mind like weed
because your mind is WEAK and BRITTLE, frobozz
I prefer to have my mind sharp - or at least as sharp as it'll get :P
like a LEAF... GGGRRRRRRrrr leaf

 

by bencomic
10-04-07
Fungahhh, leaves may be weak, but stones sink
not always. what about those volcanic rocks with the bubbles in them? they float
yes but they're also weaker than regular rock aren't they? don't mess with my analogies
yes, but not as weak as sedimentary
My point was that if you do weed you're probably going to sink
that's a stupid point and you're stupid for making it

 

by bencomic
10-04-07
so if I'm getting this right, weed is heavier than water?
yes, exactly
ANALOGY DUMBHOORJ! wildweasel: I'm amazed you want to mod this channel :P
a leaf (normal mind) is brittle and weak, but it drifts and floats. a stone (stoner, of course) is heavy and sinks
wildweasel, doesn't that suggest that you get lost without pot, floating downstream, eventually falling over a waterfall?
you're reading too far into it

 

by bencomic
10-04-07
weasel but you just made it all up and it doesn't make any sense. arbitrary analogies aren't analogies at all
Did you question Jesus' parables like that too? Or Aesop's fables? Or any Dr. Seuss story?
probably. weasel the only way that could even make sense is if you are high to begin with, right now
Sigh, I'm going back to Smash Bros.
alternate title: how to win an argument, wildweasel style
yes, get high on smash brothers, then you'll be sane
at least i'm not high on weed.

 

by bencomic
10-04-07
The doctor has specifically forbidden me from wearing underwear, due to a yeast infection. But I have to do something to cover up

 

by bencomic
10-07-07
Alright
thats it.
I do not want to come home from work, and see that me and my friends are "cripplingly retarded"
That is a DIRECT violation.

 

by bencomic
10-09-07
crank is playing with his bot, gbelo-bot.
epicfight f*k/e
"f*k" pressures "e" into smoking marijuana. Oh no!! "f*k" keeps "e" up at night with his damned rock music! "e" rapes "f*k". i'm .. i'm sorry.. i shouldn't be joking about rape.. sorry, guys..
"f*k" trips over "e"'s large dong. "e" ignores "f*k", much to the latter's chagrin. "f*k" shakes "e"'s hand. It's just friendly competition, after all! "e" wins over "f*k" by a margin of 99856!
it's always good to come home to #idiots-club to find baby crank playing with his gbelo-bot building blocks
it wasnt just me, asshole. why are you obsessed with baby me, are you a pedophile or something
because i'm tired of your constant crying and need for attention!

 

by bencomic
10-09-07
after some crap chibilain spouted about some girl and a job:
why are girls friends with people they hate?
seventh because it makes us feel better about ourselves, like hanging out with an ugly guy. by comparison, you look like a STTUUUDDDD
i don't hang out with ugly guys! ugly guys are FREAKS!
you're a freak, you're the ugly guy i'd hang out with
epicfight crank/girls
"crank" and "girls" go on a date, and things get serious, but then "crank" breaks up with "girls", leaving "girls" heartbroken!!

 

by bencomic
10-09-07
MEANWHILE IN #ZEUX:
Has nadir been behaving himself while I was gone?
* wildweasel scrolls up
Evidently we're in a grey area here

 

by bencomic
10-09-07
NihilistMatt:
oh my, aerith's theme is finishing and i'm crying again
time to switch to the conveniently located j-e-n-o-v-a
damnit, I wish there was a website or something where you could virtually self-harm...

 

by bencomic
10-10-07
nuero whatcha up to tonight?
nothing, ever
wanna come over and makeout?
man, i guess
with who

 

by bencomic
10-11-07
Since asgromo is the Queen of Barkness...
there is no King of Barkness...
when i release the full game...
you know
xD

 

by bencomic
10-11-07
well, skullie
well, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skulliewell, skullie
i was banned
i was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYdi was bannGAYd
from #idiots-club
from #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiogGAYys-clubfrom #idiog

 

by bencomic
10-11-07
it was rather gay
it was rather GAYayit was rather GAYayit was rather GAYayit was rather GAYayit was rather GAYayit was rather GAYayit was rather GAYay
or, perhaps, it was GAYay
or, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYayor, perhaps, it was GAYay
perhaps even GAYayor
perGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorperGAYaps even GAYayorpe

 

by bencomic
10-11-07
it just gets better every time
igay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay
gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer
every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYeigay jusgay gegays begaygayer every gayiGAYe

 

by bencomic
10-11-07
YUM, sweaty meaty cocks
oops, i meant pizza

 

by bencomic
10-13-07
i cant wait until braceface is on
shut the hell up
you shut the hell up
you'll never understand the subtle intricacy of braceface

 

by bencomic
10-13-07
i hope if i get a job i don't have to work at 3:30 on weekdays, so i can watch 'hey arnold'
i love it when helga says 'move it football head'
haha, she just said it

 

by bencomic
10-13-07
and what's so funny about me playing my violin?
you're gay, that's what
I have one, and I'm good
jazzy, we had a saying about violin players when i was in the school band
if a girl plays the violin, she'll probably suck your dick
if a guy plays the violin... he'll probably suck your dick

 

by bencomic
10-13-07
baby looney toons sucks, but it's funny sometimes. like they're playing hide and seek and daffy runs in to an open cabinet and that chick rabbit tries to get in there but daffy's like "fuck off"
then daffy gets in and closes the doors and they're glass, and daffy's like "fuck!"
daffy sure swears a lot
that's a paraphrasing

 

by bencomic
10-14-07
* NiMa is listening to youtubed "One Of Us" by ABBA
I love this song, and often sing it with the gender-specific words flipped around so I don't sound like a transsexual
I hate songs that don't scan if you change references to women to references to men and vice versa, or rhyme etc
staring at the ceiling, wishing (s)he was somewhere else instead... one of us is lonely... ack... ok, I'll stop

 

by bencomic
10-14-07
fred durst. what's that guy doing these days, i hope he died
he had that sex tape like 2 years ago: http://www.queerclick.com /images/freddurst.jpg
oh godddd... fred durst's o face
fred durst's penis :(
yeah, it's nice to know that no matter how far i get in life or what i accomplish, i have a bigger dick than fred durst

 

by bencomic
10-14-07
someone once told me i was in a bencomic, so naturally i had to go through the whole damn archives
lancer you were barely in it... once... serge was screaming at you
and found out that the bencomic wasn't about me, i was just an extra :/
yeah, sorry about that
my moment of fame, stolen by serge...

 

by bencomic
10-14-07
gbelobot's markov things are like a rap
are you going to photoshop a cat who looks like he's riding but so weak, you feel lonely (you have no confidence in this sword).
It is so It is so It is so weak, you feel lonely (you have no confidence in this sword).
It It is It It is so weak, It is so weak, It is so weak, you feel
It It It It is so weak, you feel It is so weak, you feel lonely
(you have no confidence in It is an angel with a gun flies from the heavens and shoots

 

by bencomic
10-14-07
korn is playing in this simpsons
why am i watching this

 

by bencomic
10-15-07
Power, we got power
and now that we can be free, c'mon and celebrate.
we've got the power, got the poowww-er
we've got the power, excessive force, industrial soundtrack to the holy wars
we got the power now, motherf***Ckers
Celebrate the might (power!)

 

by bencomic
10-15-07
* NiMa has joined #zeux
once again I find myself a courier
Guy: Asiekierka has a PM for you. No idea what it entails.
ok, I'll just, er, leave you to your lives then.
* NiMa has left #zeux (Leaving)
* NiMa has joined #zeux

 

by bencomic
10-15-07
oh, excellent. he expects me to wait around for some form of feedback on said PM too.
I guess this is how low I am in the pecking order, happily accepting orders from 10-year-olds...
so, uh, is Guy here even? as in not away
could you tell Guy to check his PM?
tell me what he'll think of my PM

 

by bencomic
10-15-07
anyway, I think I'll go before *the regulars* arrive
* NiMa has left #zeux (Leaving)
* NiMa has joined #zeux
oh.
daisy.
* NiMa has left #zeux (Leaving)

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
introducing pancake: 13 year old white supremacist metalhead + pagan + gay furry
metal is the hardest rock ever mixed with classical music. my next music project will be a white power grindcore band
metal has melodic singing while my chemical romance and other pop punk bands have whiny singing
melodic black metal, symphonic black metal, pagan black metal, viking black metal, folk black metal, depressive black metal, suicidal black metal, satanic black metal,
black death metal, black thrash metal... heavy, thrash, speed, nwobhm, power, thrash, folk, viking, symphonic, death, black, avant-garde, fusion, neo-classical, technical...
false metal = nu, metalcore, industrial (most of it), deathcore, alternative, rapcore. anyone who listens to false metal out of will is a fucking idiot
i'm making a list on all the metal genres in existance. it will take a while

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
nihilistmatt once told me that when i make fun of him sometimes he goes on a mini-rampage/temper tantrum and throws and breaks things throughout his room
(you can't see it, but he's throwing his bed out of the window in rage)
<Pancake> u suk emo boy lol xD
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
pancake comes out of the pagan closet to his mother:
well, my mom didn't throw me out for not loving jesus
did you tell her you're also a furry yet? (and what a furry is)
http://zzt.belsambar.net/nadir/heretic.gif
"i worship a horned god i mean goat, mom"
"there is no HELL..."
"Hmmm... you MAY HAVE SEEN THIS ONE COMING. I'm a pagan. I guess you can be shocked, but if you looked all all those drawings I did, it'd be pretty damn obvious."
"Honestly, this is probably the 4th or 5th time I planned to write something like this, but I always gave up. Ehn, it couldn't have gotten much more obvious. "

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
"Thanks to the whopping 3 who I told for not telling the whole world about it. Hooray for Zenith Nadir, I don't know how I should refer to you :\,
CJA, and paulguy who doesn't read this, and I've only talked to once, but meh anyways."
also, pancake, it's going to be halloween soon. Are you going to sacrifice a virgin or anything?
seventh if i can find one
sacrifice yourself

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
no one believed me when i said i was gay
i still don't exactly, i think you're just being an attention whore, but whatever
i think pancake is being "ironically" gay
pancake, what made you accept it, finally?
i accepted it when i got into furry porn
and metal

 

by bencomic
10-17-07
it's like the yearnings sailors feel for the sea...just one of those strange things you can't explain to mortals...
you're mortal too, and also a retard
queers are to busy being assfucked to think deeply... and I'll be immortal
jazzy, it's not like they're in some kind of buttsex reactor, having asssex 24/7
ahahaha buttsex reactor, i needs to gets me one of those
WHAT THE HELL?!

 

by bencomic
10-20-07
whoops, i have to leave in ten minutes
oh no... Ohhh Noooooooo! OHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOO
good
SHUT UP
guys, in my time travelling i've found out something most disturbing. lemmer died of his wounds inflicted during world war I - in 1978... lemmer.. is a time travelling space soldier who is a zombie!
can he time travel 10 minutes into the future so he gets the fuck out of here

 

by bencomic
10-24-07
[00:17:45] * Toxik takes to sucking Insidious off.
[00:25:24]
Ugh. >:/
[00:36:25] * Toxik stops sucking Insidious off. >:/
*grumble, grumble, grumble*
:(

 

by bencomic
10-24-07
guys, i have to wait 2 days for the new melt banana album to download
oh, agony
no, wait, 7 days
who is making you do that
what
wait, i meant...

 

by bencomic
10-24-07
i meant, wait...
"Who is making you wait" nadir is asking.
wait, meant i...
i, wait meant
nadir, lose weight
look who's talking, holy shit

 

by bencomic
10-24-07
BOTH of you lose weight! i can hardly breathe in here, your fat is stuck in my mouth
i'm sorry a little chubby got stuck between your lips, fungahhh
tastes gross
i SAID i was SORRY, what more do you want from me
do you want me to cut my arms off for you, fungahhh, so i can lose weight... from my arms...

 

by bencomic
10-24-07
What is nima's penis size? 4 inches?
no
shorter?
about 2 inches when flaccid

 

by bencomic
10-26-07
let's write nuero male preg fanfiction
Chibilain took the tip of Nuero's penis in her mouth. "mmm," she said, "you're so big." Nuero moaned.
Suddenly, Chibilain tightly grabbed Nuero's dick, before Nuero could even react, she shoved her tongue down Nuero's urethra and began thrusting in and out forcefully.
"What the hell are you doing?" Nuero tried to spring up, but the grip on his dick was too tight.
"I'm gonna cum!" Chibi screamed, despite not having use of her tongue. Her tongue ejaculated into Nuero's dick, implanting him with her seed.
now write the scene where nuero gives birth, 3 months early, make him have triplets out his weiner, ass, and mouth

 

by bencomic
10-26-07
i changed my mind, about writing this thing, please stop putting things in my weiner
"NNNNGGG! GOD!" Nuero screamed, clutching the side of the hospital gurney. "OH JESUS CHRIST!!!" With one strong push, an average size baby erupted out of the lower part of Nuero's abdomen,
severing his penis and testicles as well as leaving a large hole in his colon and other organs. A steady stream of warm bile dripped off the side of the gurney on to the floor. He was dead.
"Goo" said the baby, who chibi began to lick the crotch of. "Here we go again!" said the doctor as he pulled the pants off the nearest nurse, getting in the mood
dave lives in a free-for-all sex land
i write what i know...

 

by bencomic
10-30-07
you're dad's a fuking dumbass which explains you

Showing page 12.

« Previous Next »