All comics by Guueestuff12

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by Guueestuff12
4-03-07
AAAH! Mr. weirdo American Sir! There's a guy without a job trying to chop my head off!
Cow
I know you probably can't understand my superior intellect, but you have to protect me!
What superior intellect? And my name isn't 'Mr. weirdo American sir'! It's Fred.
THAT'S NOT THE POINT!

 

by Guueestuff12
4-03-07
Darn! Lost him!
Hey, there! You look like a bloodthirsty being! Let's team up and kill this Brit who asked to be baptized!
Hey! You're the guy from Episode II or III... Or something.
Yes, it's me and my Iron Antique-Rusted machete!
Yeah, I don't realy care. What were you saying earlier?

 

When good times were hidden from the world, Jimmy had to make a secret name to hide his true identity
iHeeey, Viva la Hernandeeez!
O!
by Guueestuff12, 4-05-07

 

by Guueestuff12
4-05-07
Ahh... Well, my stay in America was jolly interesting... I'd better get on the plane before the weird ones try to kill me.
...
I have the weirdest feeling that the British guy flew back to England.
Oh well, only one person left to stab with my Iron Antique-Rusted machete

 

by Guueestuff12
4-05-07
Yes?
Yeah, I work for the Post Office and the National T.V. Association. Did you know it's illegal to host a televised program without notifying the local authorities?
When did I host a T.V. show?
Oh, you know pretty darn well Mr. 'Suite Life of Devil and Devil 2'
Who's Devil 2?
Aha! A confession! You DID make an illegal T.V. show with a relly dumb name without local permission!

 

by Guueestuff12
4-18-07
Andnowit'stimeforactionfastnews!!!
Yoyoyo, everybody. Franklinhookerherewiththeactionfastnews!
And now it's geettiinng rreeeaallly slooooowww
Ha, ha! I am such a lesbo... WOOhoo!

 

by Guueestuff12
4-18-07
Hey, Puddinpumpkins! I am just writing to check how things are going in Geekworld
It's not Geekworld! And I thought We broke up, like, a year ago! So don't call me Puddinpoo or whatever!
Dude, you aren't writing to that idiot Gwen again are you?
What Pete just said reminded me that your name was Gwen. I'm gonna do you sometime, okay, Puddinpumpkins?

 

by Guueestuff12
4-18-07
You've been playing for 3 months straight without food or water. How do you do it?
Our human subtype, the Nerrds, are much better to adapting as long as we stay focused on the computer.
Wow... Is it possible to become a Nerrd? That is, if you aren't one already.
Not from a Jedi
What? Okay. No more watching Star Wars Episode III on the PC.
"What we don't have in attractiveness, we make up for in survival and digital superiority" -Melvin Froothead, 1979, the founder of the Nerrds

 

by Guueestuff12
4-18-07
Dear Gilgi, I'm sorry I e-yelled at you.
It's alright, baby. I'm sorry I called your staying place Geekworld.
Riiight. P.S. , I'll wouldn't do you if you were the last hermaphrodite on earth.

 

by Guueestuff12
4-22-07
Dude, I know you can withstand eating and drinking, but don't you ever sleep?
Insomniacs have more fun. And speaking of drink, I'm kinda thirsty. Can you get me a beer?
What? No way!
Whatever. I'll get it myself.
How old are you? You have to be ** (drinking age varies) to drink!
I'm 5,453. Now get me a Bud Light

 

by Guueestuff12
4-22-07
Yes, I finally got to level 79 on Guuscape!
Who efing cares. I'm on level 999,999,991. And it looks like I just beat it.
Shut up! You can't even swear!
Can you?

 

by Guueestuff12
11-13-07
Hey, Stumpy! Listen up, home slice! We got 45 minutes before my lunch break is over. So here's 20 bucks. Get lots o' tickets & win something good.
Swell. Just what I like to do on fine Fridays like this.
40 Minuten spater...
What up, homes? U wanna get a prize 4 all those tickets?
Sure do!
So what did u get? 20,000,000 tickets should get u something good at least!
Uh, let's see... I got a little squishy ninja thing... two toy soldiers... and half of some used gum. It's pretty good. You have to try some.

 

by Guueestuff12
11-15-07
I had fun today. What about you, G?
My name starts with S.
Look, Stumpy. I know what you did last summer.
Oh, god. Bad mojo, bad mojo.

 

by Guueestuff12
11-15-07
Welcome to Fat Burger. How can I help you through life?
Hey! Ur taht cameo guy!
... what?
U know, homes! That reapah taht's in a lot of serieses!
Um... who are you?
Ben. Ben Chupacabra del Fuego. Nice to meet u. I'll have the Quarter-pound Lardburger.

 

by Guueestuff12
11-16-07
Hey, there, pretty lady! ArOOO, you got sum fine stuff there!
Excuse me?
What!? OH GOD! I WAS HITTING ON A GUY!
Ok... that was rather uncalled for.
It would make me happy if you pretended to be a female. You wouldn't upset me, would you?

 

by Guueestuff12
11-16-07
Who are you!?
My name's L.L. Cool Cat. Sorry about the "inconvenience".
More like "innuendo"
In your end-o? Why didn't I think of that? Sweet!
NO! No! Don't let it give you any bright ideas.
Too late, hoo-HOO!

 

by Guueestuff12
11-16-07
Ben! Oh, thank God! There's a gay gray cat that wants to rear-end me!
I'm guessing taht rhyme wuz unintentional.
Yes, yes it was.
Uh-huh
... so are you going to help me!?
no

 

by Guueestuff12
11-16-07
Look, man. My brutha in there isn't too soft with homos. So can u like, leave him alone?
What? He's a GUY!?
No comment
O well... I-I guess it's cool...
Hey, don't take it personally! Somewhere out there there's a guy 4 u.

 

by Guueestuff12
11-19-07
Spater...
Thanks for getting rid of the creepy gray cat.
No big, G! U gotta b more tuff if u was eva to encounter a situation like taht again, though.
What was his name anyway?
Um... u know, I never thought of taht!
Oh
So anyway homes, u goin' 2 teh dance tomorra night?

 

by Guueestuff12
11-19-07
Ah, tihs looks like a good place to eat b-fore I go to teh dance.
omg! It's a talking penguin lmao wtf!
Um, I appreciate the lingo, homie, but... not cool-yo, man, not cool.
lol he said gangsta-gangsta stuff 2 me lmao wtf!
I think I'll just search 4 anotha table- SECURITY!!!
wtf! He's all racist, lololol!

 

by Guueestuff12
11-19-07
... ok, let's see... Ben is only 13 yards from tha hole. If he makes tihs one, he wins the final.
Fat chance. No one can make a shot like this in an urban backyard
*swing noise*
...
... OH! YES! BEN GETS IT IN AND WINS TEH TOURNAMENT! He iz also the OFICIAL Playa of the Series!
WHAT!? That is not possible! You have OFICIALLY somehow cheated!

 

by Guueestuff12
11-20-07
Ikoisonoooo! Kurabahita!
Aichinenia Kadoha!
Icheninske!
What is diz trash?
Hey, Ben. I was wondering if you could- what are you watching!?
I don't know! Some kinda violent anime show that's made to disturb people. An average anime, to put it short.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-11-08
Hey! Guess what? You're fired!
That's no way to start the new series.
Who cares! lol
You can't say that. It's illegal for old people to say lol.
Then you're fired! roflmao
You can't say that either.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-11-08
So how was work today, apprentice?
I got fired
Oh, well that's okay! As long as you killed him, it's no big deal, righ-? You know what I sayin'?
I didn't kill him
OH MY GOD! YOU GOT FIRED? YOU ARE A FAILURE! A LOSER! L-O-S-E-R! LOSER!!!
Ah, I'm used to it.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-11-08
Alright, see that one over there? The second to the left in the cart? I think it's his turn, if you know what I sayin'.
Okay
But do I get anything? I don't really like to tell people they're gonna die right on the spot.
Then the next time the GRIM REAPER asks you nicely to be his apprentice, just say no.
Alright, Mr. Attitude. I'll do it, but seriously, do I win anything?

 

by Guueestuff12
2-12-08
Alright, this is Able Two. I hacked into the hospital basement. It's full of medical waste.
*This is Able One, copy. Get upstairs to the patient, over*
Got it, but what room is he in?
*I dunno, just go up to the desk and ask for... Fred Kouger*
... Fred Kouger?
*ayup, that's him alright. Wow, that guy has long fingers.*

 

by Guueestuff12
2-13-08
Hello, I'd like to see... um... Fred Kouger please.
he's upstairs
where upstairs?
in room 666
... really?
Ayup. 666. By the way, have you seen his hand? It's made of GOLD for Christ's sake!

 

by Guueestuff12
2-19-08
I interrupt this series to talk about life and all the fun things you can do in it
Well, let's reminisce, shall we? There's parties, sex, violence, television, uh... retirement...
... and that's about all I can think of!

 

by Guueestuff12
2-19-08
You know, I'll never forget the first time I ever dated a girl.
We had all sorts of fun, It's hard to put it all in a nutshell.
But I've moved on, as you can see. Girls can destroy you, and sometimes they can't. I for one have the second one down. Hammers and nails are all you'll need. Trust me.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-19-08
And now it's time for letter(s) to the editor! Let's see, this one's from Earl, in Massachusetts.
Dearest Stickman, you suck. Middle finger sign.
Well, that's life, Earl. A lot of people suck. You just happen to suck and blow.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-19-08
Hi, all. This is Stickman tellin all the audience members HELL YEAH! Anyway, we got a guest here. What would be your name?
Salty Mike. They call me that because my special brand of salt helps clear the roads.
... special brand?
Yup! It's my sperm solidifying from a liquid to a solid! Didn't you go to college?
Yes. Why do you think I said special brand with a pause?
... oh, you have a point there.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-20-08
The ratings are in. Apparently a lot of people don't like to talk about their livliehoods with a stickman who nails himself in the forehead.
I see their point. People just like real comics better than me. I don't blame them.
But there's nothing left in store for me, cuz I'm fired. Oh well, back to your actual lives. Now.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-21-08
Well look at you, all covered in blood and what not.
Yes. Your evil deed has been done, master.
That's what I like to hear. So did he tremble in fear?
No. That was me.
... That better not be your blood you're covered in.
What would you do if I said yes?

 

by Guueestuff12
2-21-08
Well, P, what are we gonna do now?
Could I give you a blowjob, you smexy thang?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
... no, seriously.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-21-08
Hey, Reapah, what did the piggy say to the chicken?
I don't know! Or care!
oink. HAHAHA! You can't say that was not funny!
Actually, not funny was just the phrase I was aiming for
Alright people let's give this here silly billy a round of applause!
Kill me... Oh yeah, it's too late.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-21-08
Alas, I am back from the dead. My head seems to have been sewn back on. Cool.
By the Order of Merlin, I shall summon my robo-friend!
... Gotta work on my magic skills. Oh MAN! I've been dead for I don't know HOW long, and this wacko creator KEEPS CALLING ME A BARBARIAN!!!

 

by Guueestuff12
2-21-08
Ayup... that's when I said... Hey! Are you a monkey? Or are you just too FAT! HaHaHA... w00! hit me again, Bernard.
Uh, I think you've had enough greased oil for one... month. Don't you think?
I said HIT ME!... Do you have any handguns stashed somewhere nearby?
No. Leave. Now.
Well, if ya really think so, home SLICE! Haha...
omg. He laughs at SLICE. What a n00b.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-22-08
Will work for nuts and bolts.
You perverted bee-atch. You don't say 'nuts', it's just wrong!
You would know!
Yes I would, young padawan. See, I've been there. I should also note that I've done that. So you need to PULL yourSELF toGETHER and WIN the WAR against GOVERNMENT!!!
Thank you, young shirtless rebel. What is your name?
Fykus. I was born to the name Mike, but if you're punk, you HAVE to change your name to something rebellious. Like BLOODLUST BOT... or BLOODY AND LUST BOT.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-22-08
Jeez, where is everybody? Last time I was here, this place was packed! But it still looked like this so that's not much of an improvement.
Hello?
Hello, bee-atch?
Aaagh. A talking... nothing
Aaagh. A talking... nothing. Bee-atch.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-23-08
YAAAGH! I'M A REBEL!
That's great. But keep working on it.
What could possibly be better... master?
Uh, well... you gotta be more dramatic.
Do you listen to The Ramones?
THAT has NOTHING to do with this right now!

 

by Guueestuff12
2-25-08
Hello, old friend!
Aaah! A Shiite!
Wha-? No! It's me! Remember? Frank? Barbarian? Dynamic Duo? Ring a bell? And what's wrong with Shiites?
Ya know... I think I saw you once! HaHA!
Once? Dude, you were, like, my sidekick!
O rly? I dun think so! Tell you what. I'll take you to the US Army. They'll know what to do with Shiites. Trust me. I was there.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-25-08
Young one, you have another challenge I must assign you.
Oh joy.
You have been commisioned into NASA for no apparent reason. Your spaceflight is scheduled for tomorrow at 9pm sharp.
Is this optional?
No. You will have to take a break from reaper training for a while. Who knows? Maybe you'll meet some new friends.
Just what I need since you scared all of my OLD friends AWAY!

 

by Guueestuff12
2-25-08
The next day...
Well, here I am. Rock you like a hurricane. No, no, just kidding... anyway, is it hard for you to believe that in a few hours I'll be blasting off in this area while you watch?
No.
Explain.
Well, personally, I always dreamed of someone under my command that's not me go outside the atmosphere.
Really? You're perfectly fine that I could come back to Earth so crippled by its gravity that I could need extensive rehabilitation?
Yeah, why wouldn't I be? After all, you get what you deserve for not even getting one kill in the first place.

 

by Guueestuff12
2-25-08
Hey, a monkey! What's your name? Do you talk? Can you do tricks?
Of course I can talk, you ignorant boob. My name is Reginold Lupokio. I will be your commander for this mission.
Me... commanded by a monkey? It's like the whole evolution thing has been- WHOA! We're in space already? I must have fallen asleep during takeoff or something.
No, you ignorant boob. This is just a tracker image coming from the Station.
Ohhh... right. How could I be such an ignorant boob?
I guess we'll never know.

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