All comics by OnyxBlackWolf

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by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
Well I do admitt this is pretty weird, having a weird whory twin and all. So what's your name whore girl?
Hey shut up you! YOu may be my do gooding twin but that doesn't mean you can call me names!
You're right, I apologize. What's you name twin girl?
Yelyah. Yelyah Yerhpmu.
Isn't......that just..........my name backward...s? oooooooooookaaaay, I'll be taking several steps backwards now.....
Well have fun falling down the stairs backwards then. BITCH.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
So how did you get here anyway?
Well, it was quite odd really...
"...It was normal day in Bizarro world. Torin was off somewhere getting laid, Aiden was frolicking in the flowers and Lindsey was baking cookies...
FRESH COOKIES BAKED WITH LOVE! COME AND GET IT MY PRETTY ANIMAL FRIENDS!
yay! I love you Lindsey, you are such a nice person!
Antony was once again going around telling everyone he loved them and Kyle was crying and beating off in the cardboard box he calls a house
Let me give you a hug Kyle! I love you!
I wish....*starts crying again*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
Hi! I'm Ynotna! I love everyone! WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME A HUGGGGG!?
Yo man, I'm the supa-fly pimp Nirot. All the ladies wan't me and they wan't me ALL THE TIME.
Hello everyone. My name is Nedia and I'm a pacifist. We should make love and not war and stuff
Howdy-do everyone! My name is Yesdnil and I love animals, especially cute fuzzy pink ones like kitties and puppies! WOULD YOU LIKE A COOKIE BAKED WITH MY LOVE?!
My name is Elyk and I wish I were dead. God why won't anyone fuck me? *cries*
HOLY FUCK! My evil twin is all lovely dovey bullshit! SOMEONE GET ME A GODDAMED KNIFE!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
HI I'M ARIEL. I'M KYLE'S GIRLFRIEND IN RL. LOL ROFL ROFLMAO!!!1!!! ANTONY'S TRYING OUT DIFFERENT AVATARS FOR ME!
THIS ISN'T GOING TO WORK ANTONY. CHANGE IT YOU DICK!!11LOL!!1
NOOOOOO!!! YOU USED THIS FOR HAYLEY'S COMIC, AND BESIDES, I WOULDN'T FIT IN.
SO FAR I'M LIKING THE FIRST ONE BEST, THIS ONE IS FAT. WHY ARE YOU TYPING WITH ALL CAPS??? ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME!?!?!? :-o
YOU'RE A PRICK ANTONY!!! I AM NO WITCH!!! LOL!!! GO WITH EITHER THE FIRST OR FOURTH ONE!!!!
The witch it is. Note to Kyle and Ariel: I hate you. I hope you all burn in places with fire.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
So you're me......but evil?
heheheheheheh! No silly! I'm good! You're the evil blight upon the world!
Oh I did not just hear that you incredibly handsome prick.
heheheheheheh! Oh Evil Twin you are so cute! YOU SHOULD GIVE ME A HUG AND FILL IT WITH LOVE!
15 seconds later.
oh my god Antony....
WHAT?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-04-03
So....you know if we...you know, it would still technically be beating off.....
WHAT?! Listen Elyk I am NOT GAY. Thus us being opposites.
yeah...I guess that's true.
hey *cough* I'll do it.
Oh you must be that evil twin of Torin's...Nirot or whatever right?
yeeaaaaah. Evil Twin....that's uh....that's me alright, Norit yeah! That's my name! I'm evil and whatnot...my names not Torin that's for sure! hahahahah...come on Elyk.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-05-03
You heard that loud scream and the sound of flesh being reaved from still living warm bodies just then didn't you?
Eh? Are you still talking?
Meanwhile!
BWAHAHAHAHHAH! SUFFER THE WRATH OF MY RUSTED SCYTHE OF TERRIBLE TERRIBLE VIOLENCE BIZZARO WORLD CHARACTERS!
Hi Antony! Here, have a flower filled with all the peacfull intentions in the-OH GOD MY FACE! ARGHGHAOHNOOOOoooooo......
Man the chicks just can't get their hands off of me! I wonder who that figure is that's slowly creeping up behind me smelling faintly of blood and vomit is?
shhhhh, quiet Nirot, things must be compleatly silent right before I cut off a guy's fingers and gouge out his own eyes with them......

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-05-03
ANTONY! What the hell are you doing?! You're murdering all of our creepy twin creatures!
What?! Can't a guy brutally murder a cadre of peace loving men without someone giving him the eye?!
You know what, you're absolutely right. what is the world coming to? And i'm just part of the problem
Cause you shure aint part o no solution.
You know, maybe they have support groups for this kind of thing.
They have support groups for assholes now?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-05-03
Hey everyone, Antony here in yet another "Realm of the Real" comic.
My friend Michael Skinner has recently brought to my attention that my comic quote "is freaky" and that the use of the word "asshole" in the previous comic was quote "lame" and quote "unfunny."
I have something that I would instead like to point out to my readers.
I do actually have feelings. Beyond my gruff swearing, asshole exterior beats the heart of a nice guy.
So I would like to say these things to Mr. Skinner. You're comments were hurtful and rude...
And that you Mr. Skinner are AMOTHERFUCKINGCOCKSUCKING FUCKHEAD WHO DESERVES NOTHING MORE THAN A PAINFUL DEATH! I HATE YOU AND ALL OF YOUR FAMILY. MAY YOU ALL BURN IN THE FIREY LAKES OF HELL YOU FUCK

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-05-03
My life is a lie.
Why are you IMing me?
Cause you're cool. And I'm hoping some of your coolness will rub off on me.
Ewww, I already said to Torin I'm not into rubbing any men. At all. Ever. Now go away I have work to do.
I think I'm going to kill myself.
That's nice. *close window*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-05-03
...And that's why it was the best day ever.
Oh my god. The room. The room is covered in.....in ME.
Oh shut up, that's not you. It's just an exact copy of you but with with an opposite personality!
So this....this is what it's like to see yourself dead. It's.......it's madness. I think I'm blind.
Jesus christ are you even listening? Hey you! why are you sobbing curled in the fetal position hugging your clone's head? Holy fuck Kyle you are such a goddamed pussy.
L-lullaby *sob* buh....baby on the tree *sob* tree to-to-tops*cries*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
Boy was that ever fun. I've never heard more screams in my LIFE!
Yeah....that's nice Antony. But what happened to Yelyah and Yesdinl?
You know that's a good question, I don't remember killing any girl type things....
Hey...where's Kyle....oh no. no no no no. He better not be doing what I think he's doing.....
WOULD YOU LIKE A COOKIE THAT IS INFUSED WITH THE VERY ESENCE OF MY LOVE?!
Shhhh, just shut up and take your clothes off.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
DEATH FROM ABOVE GAIJIN!
OH MY GOD! LIQUID LOVE JUST SHOT OUT OF MY URETHRA!
NOOOOO! ALL MY PLANS TO ONCE AGAIN PARTAKE IN THE SWEET SWEET NECTAR THAT IS LINDSEY HAVE FAILED! I HATE YOU ANTONY! I HATE YOUUUUUU!!!!!!
Oh shut the fuck up you whiny prick! What the hell is wrong with you anyway? YOU HAVE A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND DON'T YOU?!
Ahem.
fuck.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
What's going on over there?
Ariel made her first appearence and is beating the holy S out of Kyle.
Did you just use the letter S instead of the word shit? And why the hell is she beating up Kyle?
1. You ask to many questions. 2. Shut the fuck up. 3. Because he was attempting to partake in the quote "sweet sweet nectar that is Lindsey."
hmmm, Antony seems a little bitter about that....
KICK HIS ASS ARIEL! That fucker. I'll kill him for this!
Yeah....about that. If I'm not mistaken it was you took it from him in three different holes. You're such a goddamed bitch whore.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
Since when do you care about other people's sex lives?! EH?! EHHH!?!?!?
ah........
No witty retort? Ooooh is Antony losing his touch? Hahahahahah you are such a fuckwit.
You're such a goddamed bitch Lindsey. I'm surprised anyone would want to fuck you anyway.
Hmmm, I think it has something to do with my boobs and vagina.....You Antony. You should get a vagina, then maybe you'd finally get laid.
And people wonder why I'm such a bitter jaded prick? Side note to Lindsey: You're still a fucking whore.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
In the "Real" World:
Antony, I have some news. Torin finally got you back for calling him gay. You should go read his comic.
Man I really got to set up my block list on AIM. Alright Aiden, let's see this "insult."
*reading*
I don't get it. How is Torin hiring some burly man to force anal rape upon me an insult?
He says it's revenge so I guess it's something you have to hate? I dunno, maybe it's just his fantasy or something...
That does make sense, Torin does seem to be the kind of guy that would beat off to guy on guy anal rape. Jesus Christ he's such a fucked up kid.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-06-03
It comes down to this Antony. Now it is time to decide. Do you apologize, or do we fight?
Answer: Kiss my ass, bum fucker.
Fine, if that's how you want it. You know the rules. No weapons, no special powers. Okay you ready?!
*blink*
Oh fuck me.
No means no man. No means NO.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-07-03
You know Antony, if Torin kills himself it'll be all your fault.
Ok, watch me. I'm going to stick my finger into my eye to see if I can cry for him....HrgggggggARAGHHHHHHH OH MY GOD MY EYE!
Hahaha, you're funny Antony, but I'm serious. You could go to jail.
JESUS CHRIST THERE'S BLOOD ALL OVER MY HANDS!
Well they'd probably still have strip creator in jail though. So at least I'd be entertained.
OH MY GOD I CAN FEEL A BREEZE AGAINST MY BRAIN! IT'S LIKE ACID IN MY SKULL! ACID IN MY SKUUUULLLLLLLL!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-07-03
Antony,there are like two unresolved situations now. 1. What happened to your fight with Torin? and 2. Wasn't Kyle getting the "S" beat out of him by his girlfriend?
What the fuck do you care Ms. Whores Around.
Antony would you shut the fuck up about that already?! It was one time okay? It's not like it's ever going to happen again.
Shut the fuck up bitch?
Jesus Christ you're such a bitter fuck. I hope you burn in the firey lakes of fire in Hell.
Well, time to get back to killing myself because I live a loveless and hollow life.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
Dude. Torin's last comic had an insult that was actually pretty good.
WHAT?! OH MY GOD DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THIS MEANS?!
Well it can't be that bad. It's not like it's the first sign of the Apocolypse or something.
Antony?
Yo, I heard Torin made a good joke.
Oh we are all totally fucked up the poop shoot.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
Go download Crazy Sunshine by The Pillows
CRAZZZY SUNSHINE! EIKO WAI CALLLOOOOOO!
HOLY FUCK ANTONY'S HAVING A SEIZURE!
Trust me
SHUT UP WHORE I'M LISTENING TO MY MUSIC. IT'S STOPPING ME FROM PUNCHING YOUR FACE IN.
Antony. You are such a fucking...a fucking.....a FUCKING FUCKER!
It already made me CrAzY.
Oh that one hurt, right there where my heart used to be. To bad I'm steam powered now and run on the flames of hate, otherwise I'd be crying right now. Really I would. Later bitch.
*sigh* Another day goes by.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
So the only way to stop the apocolypse is to enter that giant swirlling vortex into hell and close it from the inside?
Yep. That's how it works I guess. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Seriously who's stupid enough to go in there? I bet we could get Lindsey or Torin or Aiden to do it!
No. This job is to important to laugh it off.
Antony you have to be kidding. You're not going are you? Antony?
Make sure everyones okay. Make sure Torin gets laid and make sure Lindsey isn't the one that does it.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
This had got to be my worst idea ever. Shit I'm running head first into hell so that everyone can live.
Well...here it is. Big portal to sucksville. *sigh* The things I do for my friends. Maybe I'll comeback from the dead like in the LotCC series....
fuck. This blows.
H3LLO W3 W!LL PWN J00 KN0W ANT0NY

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
Well Antony's dead. ( did anyone else notice that little Azn grrl deamon chasing him back into hell. Didn't she come out of there?
I can't believe it man. It's just not right. (yeah that was weird, maybe the creator of the comic just forgot to remove her from every pannel?)
Hey, shut up you two. You're ruining the dramatic moment.
It's not like he won't come back eventually. He writes the damn thing after all.
Shut up Kyle you're ruining the dramatic moment! *snicker*
You guys suck.
Oh I am so *snort* so *giggle* sorr-HAHAHHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
Why are you azn now?
The creator screwed up.
Well you guys pissed me off and I forgot to change you to your normal avatar before I clicked submitt.
Ooooh.
So are you gonna change me back?
No.
HAHHAHAHAHA YOU'RE A SMALL ASIAN GIRL FOREVER NOW!!!!
I hate you. I really fucking hate you.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
Yay! I'm me again! I have boobs and everything!
Hey Hayley. Where's Antony? I have to go make fun of him.
Yeah....about that. You know that whole apocolypse thing blah blah blah? Yeah, he stopped that by going into hell and closing the gates.
Oh....wait. He's dead?
'fraid so.
WOOOOOOOOOOHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! IT'S A DANCIN TIME NOW MS. HAYLEY!!!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-08-03
It's been like four comics. Shouldn't Antony be back?
Yeah seriously, I'm starting to miss him. I mean....starting to miss seeing him. I mean, fuck what do I mean?
Meanwhile in Hell
Year 55. Jesus has it been that long already? Time moves so goddamed slow down here. Shit here comes another one.
WE WILL KILLZ J00 ANT0NY!
*super awesome kung-fu moves power* How many of these fucking things does one have to kill before he can get the fuck outta here?
OH GOD MY FLESH! AND MY L33T SPEAK!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-09-03
Oh man, did you read Ender's comic?
Is this a truck question? Do I read shitty comics?
Ooooh burn. But no. No. No. Listen Kyle, he made fun of Jews.
Woah! I bet Antony would care if he were still alive and not in hell right now.
Arn't you Jewish?
Arn't I a what now?

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
Oh Kyle I love you so much.
Mhmmmm.
Inside Kyle's head at this very moment
Well, I guess it's time to get naked.
Is it? Hold on, let me join you.
Kyle? Kyle are you even listening?
What? What?! NO! I WASN'T THINKING WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO HAVE A THREE WAY WITH YOU AND LINDSEY WHILE EATING A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWHICH! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS, THE GODDAMED SPANISH INQUISITION?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
I can't belive we're doing this, it seems so....so........wrong.
I know, but it has to be done.
WELCOME TO THE AUDITIONS TO REPLACE ANTONY!
Yo Yo YO Wassup Wassup WASSSUPPPP!!!
Are you serious? Get the fuck out of here "urban" black guy! For the love of christ we live on the uber-rich plateau area, there is NO excuse for talking like an innercity asshole!
Hello! My name is Osama Bin.....uh....Steve. My name is Steve Mouskowitz.
No. No no no. Kyle! Where the fuck is my knife?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
(that's Ender and Torin, not Kyle and Antony DUH)
OMG, that is the best picture of Asuka I've ever seen. Woah! I'm talking coherently and in compleate sentences!
Yeah, you're in Onyx's comic, and he drew that picture too.
Really? .......
Yep and......what are you doing? Ender? Ender?! OH MY GOD MY EYES!!!!
Oh my god Torin, what the fuck happened to you?! It looks like you clawed out your own eyes.
I saw..........I saw it. HE WAS DOING IT. Oh god. I feel so cold. He was, he was crying, a beating off and eating.........at the same time. AT THE SAME TIME AIDEN! THE SAME FUCKING TIME! *cries*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
You gots some nice boobs there young lady.
No Grandpa, get the fuck out of here before I kill you and offer you up to Lolth the spider queen.
No one gets me man. I'm a loner with pale skin and a foot fetish. I talk in a raspy voice because it proveshow ass kicking I am the world is meaningles man It's all about the-GLARK! *dead action*
LINDSEYYYYY.... I KILLED ANOTHER ONE!!!!
This is not going well.
OH MY GOD THIS ROOM IS COVERED IN BLOOD!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
BRING IN THE NEXT ONE!
Hello! My name is Butch and I...
...AM GOING TO KILL EVERYONE AND TURN THEIR FLESH INTO A SUIT. BLOOD FOR THE DEVIL! ALL THE PAIN OF THE WORLD SHALL BE MINE TO GIVE!
...
He's perfect.
He's perfect.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
...And I was like YOUR MOM! HAHAHHAHAHAH!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! (this room is still covered in blood.)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! MURDER DEATH KILL!!! GWAHAHAHHAAHHAH!
...
what?
No means no Butch. No. Means. NO.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
Seriously, we need Butch gone. He's a freaking one joke character, and he always stares at me...
Yeah....you're probably right.
GET BACK HERE! I ONLY WANT TO LOVE YOU!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SOMEONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HELP ME!!!!!!!!
Yeah....that's not good.
Maybe we should be doing something instead of standing around? ....NAH.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-10-03
COME BACK! IT'S ONLY A BOX FILLED WITH YOUR HORRIBLE HORRIBLE DEATH!!!!!
SWEET HOLY JESUS CHRIST!
ARGHHHH MY MONOTONE FLESH!
WOAH! Did I just do that?
SWEET MAYBE I'M DEVELOPING KICK ASS SUPER POWERS!!!!
Yeah...probably not.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-12-03
Antony?
You're back?
Who?
It's you right? You're back?
Where am I anyway?
*this is gonna be a looong day.*

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-12-03
What the hell happened to Butch?
Werido Ranger boy smote him. With fire.
*side note: why does everyone die by fire?*
Ranger?!? Like Antony Ranger?!??!?!?!
I might've said something about it being Antony if I knew. Also, I'd stay away from him if I were you, he doesn't talk much and he sets things on fire WITH HIS MIND.
Shit, this comic needs to get funny, and FAST.
"Obligatory 69 joke"
L33T SP3AK!!!!!!!! L3333333T SP333333AAAAKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
Hey guys what's-HOLY SHIT! WHY IS IT WHENEVER I COME SAY HI THE ROOM IS COVERED IN BLOOD AND THINGS ARE ON FIRE?!!?!
Is that a question even worth answering?
Hey man,my name's Ender! What's your name my arrow and bow toting friend?!
NUMBER THREE! NUMBER THREE!!!
ARGGGHHHH! THE FAT CELLS OF MY BODY ARE BURNING LIKE CRISCO!!!!!! mmmm crisco. AHHHHHHH THE FIRE!!!!!!
MAKE THE PAIN END, MAKE IT END!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
The Ranger guy killed Ender
Remind me why I care?
He just splattered Toin all across the living room.
*yawn* Oh are you still talking?
Kyle. He killed Ariel. She's screaming and burning right now. Oh god I can't watch this but I can't turn away....
NOOOO!!!! TETSUOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
hello.
Uh....hi? -please don't kill me-
*cocks head to one side* Why are both your eyes on one side of your nose? And your mouth all the way at the back of your face?
because I was born that way? Jesus Christ who cares?
I better not hear any cracks because I used the word "cock"
Fair enough-SEVEN. THIS MAN IS SEVEN.
Oh please...no...what are you OH MY GOD MY RED SHIRT AND KHAKI PANTS!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
HEY RANGER BOY!
They're all around. around and above and through and below. No one walks were I walk, they do not see yet they fear. I am cold on all planes.
Ooooooookay. I have a few questions for you. 1) Why do you keep talking about numbers? and 2) WHY THE FUCK DID YOU KILL MY GIRLFRIEND YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Can't you see them? They're clawing through us. Not me. Not anymore, they've touched me already you see they know of what I am. I do not kill I cleanse. I had to be free you see?
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!?!
they come for us. They come for me. They claw and bite and stab and slash. SINS! ALL OF THEM SIN AGAINST US!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
It burns and hurts and twists and curves. It's a dagger of bone that reaves. In and out and through again it goes.
Up and through and down and back. Have to find the heart it does. Cut it out it must. Feel no pain. Kill. Kill. Kill. KILL.
Yeah......He's pretty fucked up, whoever he is.
Jesus christ, who's bright idea was it to give super powers to a psycho?!
So Ariel....how's it going?
I got turned into ashes and it hurts like fuck. So it's safe to say that IT'S GOING PRETTY GOOD. IT'S ALL LOVE AND PUPPIES AND SHIT! BEING ASHES IS GREAT! bitch.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
*stabbing himself with a dagger*
Woah! WOAH!! What the hell are you doing ranger boy?!
This is the only way I can feel now. This is the only time I feel alive. Concentrate on the pain. It's the only thing in life that's real.
Yeah....that's pretty fucked up. Where did you come from anyway? I mean first off you save me from Butch and then you start killing all my friends...
everyone I've ever known has died in my mind. People are shadows. I cannot see through them, but past them. Around them. Where one walks many walk.
About that, WHEN THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA START SPEAKING IN COHERENT SENTENCES AND NOT FUCKED UP SHIT LIKE JTHM!?!?!?!?!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
There is nothing. I am nothing. Please help me. Save me from myself.
OMG ISN'T THIS THE DEEPEST COMIC YOU'VE EVER READ!?!?!? I MUST BE AN ANALYTICAL GENIUS OR SOMETHING CAUSE LOOK HOW COOL THIS COMIC IS!

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
Follow follow into pain follow into hate.
ANTONY! YOU NEED TO SNAP OUT OF IT! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU IN...WELL....HELL!?!?!?!?
Hey...guys. I....I made it. I made it back.
...uh....
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?!?
I HAVE NO IDEA OH MY GOD I'M CRYING BLOOD BECAUSE I'M HAVING AN ANUERISM. THAT IS WHAT MAKES THIS COMIC FUNNY.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-13-03
So if Antony is you, who's this ranger fellow?!
Duh, he's a mimic. There's like a whole section of hell devoted to these bastards. They just take on your look and personality when they met you.
NO! I WILL BE ANTONY I WILL BE POWER I WILL *transform action*
I SHALL BE IN THE EARTH! I SHALL BE OF FLESH! I SHALL-
*head explodey action* Like one of you guys could take me. Honestly.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-14-03
Okay so I'm the medium through which people will ask questions, like this one: "What was that ranger thing about?!"
I get the joy of answering such questions like so: "The ranger was just a demon who met me in hell, copied me, and somehow managed to escape before I did."
Okay this should be easy then.
"Way back before you went to hell you and Torin had a fight. Who won?"
"I did you fucktard. Torin's two years my junior, I handed him his ass."
See? That was easy! If you have a question you want answered...
...about anything. Anything at all, go ahead and PM or IM me. Man, I hope this segment works.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-14-03
Ender Asks: "Why am i so fat? And why do I always have an urge to grab a sandwich, cry and look at Antonys Asuka picture and beat off?"
Because you're a big fat dork that has a better chance with Torin then he does with girls the world over.
Tony P Asks: "What would happen in a fight between you and a horrible demon-form version of the red robot?"
It happened. I saw RR down in hell and he was seriously non-plussed. Didn't matter, I still ripped him into tiny pieces and scattered him about the firey burning floor.
Aiden Asks:"How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if my father didn't have a drinking problem?"
Aiden. That was the stupidest fucking question ever. EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER. Now go home and cry while your daddy hits you.

 

by OnyxBlackWolf
9-14-03
We have a question in from Kyle today! He asks: "Why don't you bring my girlfriend back?!"
Why don'y you calm down first? Jesus Christ have I ever killed off chracters permanently?
You have killed chracters permently. In fact, you do it all the time.
Shhhhh. Quite nararator guy, here's a question from Kyle's little brother Kirk: "Where can I get a strategy guide for Suikoden III?"
...
Oh shit he's gonna-
How about this for an answer. STOP BEING SUCH A LITTLE NERD BALL AND GO HAVE SEX. Jesus Christ, I bet that kid doesn't even know what a vagina IS. Stupid little prick.

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