All comics by Yoba

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by Yoba
4-06-03
So you say you want a guy named Jimmy dead, he's a dinosaur, and you want him dead because he shoved your turkey up his ass???
That's exactly what I'm saying!!
Sounds good....Now, after I dispose the body, I make it so his wife gets charged...
perfect................
But you're saying he's a dinosaur! There aren't any dinosaurs!
I'm a walking lizard, aren't I?

 

by Yoba
4-10-03
Butch craftilly dresses up as a salesman, and gains entrance into Jimmy's house...
So you said you're selling what?
Sell??!!! Who the hell do you thin I am??!!!
You are the salesman, aren't you?
Oh, just shut up, crazy bastard who shoves other people's turkeys up his ass!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!
Now to turn the tables...That bastard BOB didn't pay me enough for this job....

 

by Yoba
4-15-03
heeheeheeheeheeheehee!!!!!!i have yet again created zee greatezt invention in za vorld!
what is it this time? Create a "cyber" pet rock? It could say "it's just like thirty years ago!!!!But, you can put neon lights on your fucked up rock you can usually find behind the local 7-11"!
No no no no no! I have created somezing bettar!!!!
like what?? did you crate a virtual reality helmet that enables you to fuck the girl of your dreams in any fantasy you want, and you can feel everything?
Actually,it is! only thing is, you cannot try it ever.
AWWWWW CRAP!

 

by Yoba
4-16-03
Whoop! what it is!?
sorry bud..you're gonna have to be clearer than that!
I said-a WHOOP! what it is!?
uhhh...sir. what the hell are you talking about?!
The moral of the story is, when you're not dealing with wannabes, talk like a civilized human being!
I said a whoop what it is. A WHOOP WHAT IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DAMN, YOU'RE SCREWED!

 

by Yoba
4-23-03
yo. Yoba here. Y'all might be wondering why I'm doing the new "Satin's Job". Well, I got special word from MDMM, and from now on it's gonna be from me. ENJOY
You are about to die. What is your last wish?
Dude! Just shut the fuck up!!
uhhhhh.......don't you have a wish you want come true? you can get anything.
well, in that case, I wish i had a beautiful model to help me with my studies....RAOW!
DO THAT HOMEWORK NOW!!!!!YOU DON'T FINISH THAT ESSAY NOW, NO MORE ANAL FUCKING FOR YOU!!!!!GET TO IT!!!
I'm working! I'm Working!

 

by Yoba
5-01-03
Butch, the assasin, decides to go and kill BOB's wife, because he didn't pay him enough for a recent hit on Jimmy. Things could get a little steamy....
uhhh....could i help you?
okay. First, i kill her, send the body to BOB, attach a letter aparently from Jimmy, who also decided to take his own life....
now now.....don't be silly. we'll get to that in a minute.....first, i have a couple of questions to ask you.
Yowzers!!! go go gadget fuckers!!!!!
Really??!!! He was going to kill you? Good thing you got to him first!
Don't worry, he was desperate. It was only like, 2 inches long!

 

by Yoba
5-11-03
YO!
YO-BA!
YO!
YO-BA!
This is crap. Anyone seen Yao Ming? YO-GI!

 

by Yoba
5-11-03
YO!
YO-BA!
Okay jackass, listen to me. For the last f***ing time, YO!
YO-BA!
Welcome. Please leave your soul at the door.
YO-BA!

 

by Yoba
5-12-03
yo.
YO-BA!
YO-GI!
YO-BA!
YO-GI!
YO-BA!

 

by Yoba
5-12-03
YO-GI!
YO-BA!
YO-GI!
YO-BA!
YO-GI!
YO-BA!

 

by Yoba
5-12-03
30 years later.
Y-Y-Y-Y-OOOO-----G-G-G-G-IIIIIIII.......*HACK!*
Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-OOOOO------BBBABABAAAAAAA.....*COUGH!*
This series of comics is dedicated to those shitty Yao Ming "c a n a w r i t e a c h e c k ?" comercials. "YO!"

 

by Yoba
5-15-03
WHOOHOO! I'm finally on MSN! I'll add some contacts.
...................
how the hell can 60 people be offline at once???!!!!!!

 

by Yoba
5-17-03
Hey Joe! check out the public profile i put on MSN messanger!
uhhh...Timmy...... You put your real picture up with your webcam, put your real name, and made your status single and looking? isn't that dangerous?
it's not like anyone knows who i am...
You put your fucking house number!
so......

 

by Yoba
5-17-03
3 Years Ago
so Holly.... You're finally moving away from home. We're all gonna miss you....
thanks daddy. I'm going to the big city. Always be sure to visit once in a while!
2 years later
well, this is where Holly lives.....i can't wait to see her... she's allgrown up.
who the fuck are you.

 

by Yoba
5-18-03
Judge Juliu, i'm fed up with MDMM. Just give him the fucking $5000, so we can all be friends again.
son, who are you talking to?
you. i mean, ever since i got the money and donna, MDMM hasn't been the same. He's acting really weird. Yesterday he mooned me.
son, i'm sorry, but i don't know what you're talking about.
heeheeheeheeheeheeheehe!!!!!! stupid bitch.

 

by Yoba
5-18-03
i ain't pleadin' guilty!
what the fuck's wrong with you, you dumb ass son of a bitch?
yup, THAT'S ME!
you killed a 90 year old granny on her way to make a will for her grand children. Now moone in her family will get that tricked out honda she drags at the track....how tragic!
what the fuck are you doin in here, MDMM?!!!
I chopped off intesine man's nads.

 

by Yoba
5-18-03
i am ulanga.
and i am ulunga. we are porn people. it is allowed in our hometown of afganistan!
we will say dirty things.......fuck me bitch fuck me.
up the ass bitch, up the ass.
oh ya! go get the popcorn mustafah!

 

by Yoba
5-18-03
due to the graphic and immature nature of the previous comic entitled "very bad asian girls", we have ordered Yoba to tell the world something apologetic.
sorry?

 

by Yoba
5-19-03
why the hell do i have to put OFF bug repelent on? i know about west nile, but why OFF?
Because "deep woods OFF" is recommended by Bob Izumi.
Bob Izumi? He recommends stuff?
Ya, he's some fishing guy on TV.
HI, i am mister legendary Bob Izumi.
Who the fuck is Bob Izumi?

 

by Yoba
5-19-03
Really. Who the fuck is Bob Izumi?

 

by Yoba
5-20-03
Hey timmy! how's about a hug for your favorite uncle Joey, huh?
wait until i'm off the goddamn computer......stupid son of a bitch....
so, what do you think? i came all the way from australia!
I'm gonna kill that damn cat!
it's okay that you killed mr.fluffles #1. i have 30 extras in the car!
shit.....

 

by Yoba
5-31-03
Hey Timmy. Watcha doin'?
I've gone onto the X-unite message board to post the many mistakes and false transfers from the comic book series to the new X-Men movie.
you mean to tell me you actually went to the theater and remembered everything in its entirety???
Well, I did bring my pen and note pad, but overall, yeah. That's exectly what I did.
Man Timmy, someday you gonna get shot right in the nutsack!
Well, according to the X-unite message board, I am top leader above all! now to learn clingon.....

 

by Yoba
6-03-03
What started out as the Chick n goat guy show.....
So Goat, what's the topic for today's show?
Hey, you know what???? FUCK YOU!
No, FUCK YOU!
I porked your mama, ya motherfuckin' stupid dumb-ass bitch!
I'm gonna hunt you down you crazy motherfucker!
Thank you for coming. We will be cancelling this celebrity deathmatch. Have a safe drive home.........MOTHAFUCKAZ!!!!!

 

by Yoba
6-07-03
You know what I hate, Goat?
What do you hate, Mr.Chicken?
I hate it when you're chatting on MSN, and a guy comes online. You ask him a bunch of questions, and he tells you to shut the fuck up. You ask him 1 more, then he blocks you! That really pisses me off
Do you ever get to talk to this guy other than in MSN?
Ya, I see him 4 times a week.
Man, you've got major issues.

 

by Yoba
6-16-03
It has not been 3 months since I last posted a comic!
It has been!
DUDE! I'm having a vision! DUDE! It looks like that airplane scene in "Final Destination!"
.........
rrrrrriiiiiigggghhhhhtttt.......

 

by Yoba
6-16-03
Yoba, my career is ruined! The fucking asian girl from afganistan...............She turned my dog into an alchaholic!
Well Ted, it can't be THAT bad. Didn't he already smoke?
That's still nothing compared to alchahol! Nicotene calms him down, when he could possibly do anything when he's drunk!
Okay......
I swear to drunk I'm not god!

 

by Yoba
7-13-03
A super smart computer argues with a super dumb-ass kid...
BY GOD YOBA, YOU'RE SICK!
What makes you sat that, Mr. PC?
You haven't logged onto Stripcreator in almost a month! You disgust me!
I was busy, you fuck. What is this? Some sort of ad campaign????
We thank you for taking time to view this Stripcreator comercial! Now you can go back to your worthless, fucked up lives!
FREELINER!

 

by Yoba
7-13-03
Hello there. On behalf of Yoba, I am happy to inform you that there will be YET another worthless comic series on its way! So, go on and read it!
FREELINER!
FREELINER!
Must keep calm...I will quietly go over there........AND KICK HIS ASS!
FREELINER...AHH! MY BALLS!

 

by Yoba
8-01-03
It just doesn't make sense!
I mean, if a person doesn't make enough comics,they get burned for it.
And when they finally make one, people call it a crummy pile of horseshit....What a society we live in!

 

by Yoba
1-28-04
Hello! Guess what? YOBA'S BACK!
Who the hell are you?

 

by Yoba
1-28-04
Hey Monks, how long's it gonna be until we reach Uranus?
HAHAHA! Stupid bitch! Wanna wash it while you're at it?
Have you ever been trapped in space with an idiotic monkey who keeps annoying you, and you want him to burn in hell?
Have I ever!
Then use "Killer in a Can"! Unleash hell on your monkey buddy! NOTE: No monkeys were harmed in the making of this strip.
EAT THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!
Hey Monks......

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
I just can't believe how addictive these online games can be. Whee! I found a rare!
Uhhh....Timmy, when was the last time you went outside?
Well, sice I'm attached to an IV, I'd say about a week ago. Anyway, it's too cold to go outside.
Timmy! It's September! You've been sitting here for almost a year!
Oh god it's cold...... I'm being eaten alive!
I see Yoba's fucked up another strip.

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
Hello fellow slaves, and welcome to another edition of the Chicken and Goat Guy show. Today's topic is...Drumroll please...Vaginas.
Chicken, we can't say that on TV! The network will turn us into their dinner...I have a crosshair at my head as we speak....
Bah! Who gives a shit about the fucking network. Hey FOX! Go fuck yourselves!
We're not on FOX....Oh shit.
I think the goat was the tastiest.

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
This is Bill
Hey there. I'm Bill. I'm havin' problems.
This is another caption of Bill
I was at a fast-food joint yesterday. Why can't those people just do their jobs?
Wht the fuck happened to Bill?
Welcome To McDonald's sir. How may I help you?
WHERE'S MY MOTHERFUCKING WHOPPER???!!!

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
Hey, welcome to another edition of the Chicken and Goat Guy Show. Today's topic is theme music. WHY THE HELL DON'T WE HAVE ONE???!!!
That's a good question Chicken. So I went onto the streets to find out!
Excuse me sir, but could you tell me why the Chicken and Goat Guy show doesn't have a theme song, and do you have any suggestions?
Ya. Because you guys blow, and you suck. Now go fuck yourself while I go eat a rat.
Theme song: IT'S THE CHICKEN AND GOAT GUY SHOW! GO........FUCK YOURSELF! [Brought to you by sex jelly.
Well, that was weird.
Yes, very.

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
Hello and welcome to the Chicken and Goat Guy show! Unfortunatly, Goat Guy couldn't be with us, so my guest host for tonight will be...Death!
Hello!
So Death, how's business going?
Great! But too bad. I'm afraid your time's up.
It's.....so cold
Oh shut the fuck up!

 

by Yoba
1-29-04
The other day I saw this dude, and he's all like "yo, how old are ya?" I kept walking, but it turns out he was an alien, and he anal probed me
What, is that like getting bumhumped?
Yes, but without the squishyness
I have to try that for myself!
It's called a dildo.
Awwww.......Dildo....

 

by Yoba
1-30-04
Hello, and welcome to the Chicken and Goat Guy show. Goat Guy's gone again today, so my guest host will be....The one and only...YOBA!
Hey, whatever happened to Goat Guy? I haven't seen him around since about three comics ago.
Well, they're your comic strips, so it's you who's making these kind of things happen. It is your imagination, you know.
Woah. Freaky. Then that means I can do this!
Oh god.

 

by Yoba
1-30-04
Yoba. Have you ever noticed your comics really stink, and they use an over-indulgance of profanity?
What? I know they do.

 

by Yoba
1-30-04
So, could you tell us why you must act like an uncivilized animal?
But swearing is good for you! It's been proven by the doctor association of Kentucky.
Isn't that where they make the Finger-lickin'-good chicken?
Yeah, KFC.
Mmmmm.....Chicken...
Here. Watch this ad on swearing. Which will strangely appear on the next strip!

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
This Public service announcement has been brought to you by the Doctors' Association of Kentucky. By the way: Try our chicken!
Son, would you like a candy?
Fuck you!
Hehehe. Bitch.

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
I really think we should create a new series, person of my future.
Why's that?
The series I was just making could be found offensive to quite a few people.
But that's the case with every one of your other strips.
You prove a very good point. Yoba of the future, what is Jupiter like?
There's a shortage of chairs...

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
Welcome to the Discovery Channel. Today we will be talking to scientist Dr. Fieldstein. He will be arriving shortly. I wonder if any Grizzlies have been located in this area...
.........
If we wait a little longer, perhaps he will show up.
Tasty.....
I see my experiment worked perfectly!
Sir...Even though I am keeping a straight face....My crotch is gone.....

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
Hello, and today on this show, I am on the moon...And, I currently cannot breathe.
With the pressure of standing in space, and the Carbon Dioxide in your brain, I'd say your head will explode in about half a minute.
While I can still breathe, how does it feel to be an astronaut?
It's a tedious job, you know. It aint all fun and games.
...............
My eyes are bulging out of my head...*POP!* Oh, there they go.

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
I still can't see how movies have become so incredibly atrocious! What happened to the classics, like every porno from the 1940's?
You've got major issues man. Movies are at their prime! With a new movie being released every day, there's endless variety.
I still think silent pictures beat all. Chaplin used to dance that good old dance. Ahh....Whatever happened to him?
He's dead.
Oh, I see. So, what movies interest you, Mr. picky?
Oh, I'm a Bollywood addict.

 

by Yoba
2-01-04
If I were to be president.....What would I do?
I'd make moving speeches!
'Sup?
I'd get up off my ass.

 

by Yoba
2-26-04
Hey, have you ever noticed that we're like an amateur Aqua Teen Hunger Force?
Uhhh........No.
Think about it. We're animated, detectives, and we do absolutely nothing!
That is so not true.
Aqua Teen Hunger Force is an amazingly funny show, and many people actually view it.
Always a fucking punchline.

 

by Yoba
2-26-04
Family Guy is far superior to the Simpsons. Its satirical, nonsensical, random humour gave birth to a new style of cartooning.
But the Simpsons is legendary!
So's Family Guy. Did I mention it's also much funnier?
Ah, but the Simpsons has lasted over 13 seasons..
Fatass
Fuck you

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