All comics by nuveeeeena

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by nuveeeeena
3-23-04
too long standing and looking from the outside
say ABB!
ABB!
i like to say it with pride
ABB!
ABB!
now when you vote, vote well
and make sure that it counts
now you're down with a discount

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
ABB can be heard the right way at
http://www.takebackthemedia.com/
ABB! (Anybody But Bush.)
from the upcoming "Den of Thieves"

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
we got somethin' special lined up for Nuvee. Shhh. between us, 'kay? we want it to be a surprise

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
rudy ponders US energy policy
gas was 1.58 last week. yesterday it was 1.79... tomorrow it's probably going to be 3.99 with a $5 mail-in rebate
sonofaBITCH
the SPR is the Strategic Petroleum Reserves
you don't get as much opec money for your oil if the traded oil is in dollars these days
high gas prices in an election year? All responses involve the SPR
slacking on the filling of the SPR could lower the pump price for fall?
boooosh can get you lower gas bills, is THAT it?
i'm using too many words...

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
THERE IS ONE THING THAT
Bush is toast
snigger -- the toast of the town
WE ALL AGREE ON...
with 4 more years, we will create um, more jobs, balance the budget and conquer the world
when monkeys (R) fly out of my ass
the viking kittens really are one of the coolest things on the web. http://www.lackofoxygen.net/vikingkittens/
yep. the kittens take a while to load if you're an impoverished dial-up liberal like me but it's still worth it
but for most of us normal people with DSL, it rocks right on

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
DaCat said: the political cartoon I want to see is GW Bush in his flight suit looking nervously at the 9-11 with a sign that says "George W Bush, live testimony, today"
ulp
the mike is live, sir
and him saying "All in all I'd rather be in Vietnam"
Mr. George W. Bush? You have been served.
All in all, i'd rather be in Vietnam
hee hee

 

by nuveeeeena
3-24-04
on the cutting floor of finding nemo....
i don't have a problem with cross-species relationships
give it up already. i'm swimming away -- far away

 

by nuveeeeena
3-26-04
i get rant-y
I bemoan the politics of personal destruction which the GOP would NEVER engage in...
FUCK THE NEOCONS! Norman Rockwell's happy ass nuclear family never existed on a wide scale basis. This ain't Leave it to Beaver
did i mention fuck racists?
Pious warmongering incompetent boneheads. And fuck the Patriot Act, too. that is some scary and unconstitutional bullshit.
I have no use for Laura Ingraham or Barbara "Charcoal" Olson either...
I'd say FUCK ANN COULTER, but NOBODY is gonna do THAT. Not even Bill Maher.
Get my book SLANDER, in cut-out bins everywhere!

 

by nuveeeeena
3-26-04
9-11 COMMITTEE HEARING TRANSCRIPTS -->
respect my authority ... hyuk. i love that line...
http://www.washingtonpost.com /wp-dyn/articles/A17798-2004Mar23.html
time to go cut some brush
http://www.washingtonpost.com /wp-dyn/articles/A20349-2004Mar24.html
how does "gimme four more years and $4 trillion" sound..?

 

by nuveeeeena
3-26-04
i'm not sure you CAN spend too much time with chickens...
my good buddy Torcha does NOT, I repeat, DOES NOT fuck chickens
squawk
was it good for you?
some things are too good not to share
http://www.reindl.us/images/oreillythong.jpg

 

by nuveeeeena
3-26-04
Traditionally, at the Radio and Television Correspondents' Association
"Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere,"
HA. HA.
60th Annual Dinner members of government and media mingle for a night of comedy.
"Whenever you ask him a question, he replies, 'Let's see what my little friend says.'"
you're about as funny as Dennis Miller
I had a hell of a time explaining John Kerry's foreign policy to Condi
it would be funny if it weren't so true, fuckwad

 

by nuveeeeena
3-26-04
"Howard Dean was the first person who legitimized it for all of us to say we don't like what's going on here,"
WOOOOT!
Elsewhere, at the Democrat Unity Dinner
"Our party has a new leader now"
"The Republicans are going to do their darndest to turn a good man into a comic strip"
our last duly elected President had something to say...
"Most of us could have gone to Vietnam and didn't go. And John Kerry said, 'Send me.'

 

by nuveeeeena
3-27-04
Over dinner, House Majority Leader
Tom Delay ponders stepping down
it's just a partisan witch hunt...
Texans for a Republican Majority PAC --- PARTISAN? naaah
from his leadership position if indicted
TRM spent corporate money to influence the 2002 state House races in violation of Texas law.

 

by nuveeeeena
3-27-04
I'll need you to take notes for this private executive planning session
yes, sir.
Have you considered poison? How about a lone nut type? Small charter plane incident?
been there, done that. we'll need kryptonite for this guy...
do I file these notes under B or L for Bin laden?
Fuck no. Under C for Richard Clarke

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
chat conversations can be insightful even when you aren't participating
inky is ordering salad for his wife, stan and babs is doing a...
aww. She's taxiing him to the airport.
i wish my brain could run 25 hours a day, but it can't
dling cathodo luminescent materials... maybe you need your rear aligned..
snerk! yawn...
http://www.bartcopnation.com /dc/user_files/8698.gif
lol! omg that's good. sleep is so overrated...

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
It's true. We don't think of workers as human beings per se. In fact, we'd prefer to have fewer of you.
There's a whole industry built on the tedious nature of employee benefits and the drudgery of having to PAY you. (employee leasing)
meat
We don't even USE the words "people" or "employee" in our planning meetings. You are FTEs. Or FTE units.

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
it was great. i had a sausage on a stick, and an awesome blossum and the donuts on the way down
did you guys have fun?
A DAY AT THE REN FAIR EXPLAINED BY MY KIDS
i wanted a real sword. i have $150 in my savings
... and the meat pasties, and the fried alligator and the breakfast tacos and the hot cider and..
you need to quit. both of you, actually
i didn't get anything but bagels and root beer and jerky and tacos and sausage and cider and...

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
the world exploded in love by bob schneider is one of my favorite songs
there is a universe that can't be seen. it's a feeling, if you know what i mean
a delectable dimension, undetectable by sight, fills up your heart in the dead of the night.
http://www.bobschneidermusic.com/
some say it's an astral plane, can't be observed, can't be explained
the world exploded in love all around me. everytime i take a look around me, i have to smile

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
there's a basic difference between
aaargh. what WAS he thinking??
I should have asked for 3 hamburgers
the way males and females think
pinwheel steak
sack of white castles
but i haven't got it fully worked out
steak lard nar
Guero's beef fajitas

 

by nuveeeeena
3-30-04
insurance humor
titter
groan
...a quarter of a million members left uncovered...
bwah!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
Neocons v Libs _____how they see us
how we are

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
big time
it's evil
we love it
yeah, we do hon. and it's about time
http://www.airamericaradio.com
it's more fun than burning copies of "Left Behind" even

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
Open letter to Charlton Heston:
dig it. happiness IS a warm gun. but i love nature; the earth is irreplaceable. And I vote Democrat
Things are not always as they seem
those MO-rons in the White House would trash this beautiful country. And don't get me started about the Patriot Act
Don't get too comfy in yer WH office
hoooboy do I
you vote Dem AND you've got guns, right?

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
chatroom romance done poorly is
i'm a princess fairy nymph looking for a sugar daddy
vous etes arrivee
too volatile even for this format
le HUH?
i hate *******, your *****, your ****, your ***, the way you *****, the way you ****. I even hate your ***.
and is a subject best left alone
wtf
yup

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
complaints about this strip can be
ring riinnnng
zzzzz
addressed to eatme@heathen.com
riiinnng riinnnng
zzznk..huh!? damn
riing.. ri-click dialtone
this hands free headset isn't doing me a damn bit of good. grumble

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
The arguments in defense of the Smash-And-Grab Administration are getting pretty feeble
Oh, Richard Clarke is such a NON-ISSUE. He's just BORING.
Sandy Berger who? The Clinton papers on Bin Laden are SUCH a non-issue. You liberals with your subpoenas are so tedious.
I mean, if you have absolutely zero interest in the public good and you want to drown government in the bathtub, WHY seek higher office?
Poor people? Yawn. They should get jobs. BO-RING!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
THE LIBERATION OF AFGHANISTAN
THE LIBERATION OF IRAQ
LIBERATION: Coming to your geopolitically sensitive country soon
over my dead body
if production rates fall we may need to "liberate" you...

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
the Parmer elementary school student
council elections were not without
If I'm elected Class President, I'm going to booze it up, vacation every day, steal every dime I can, and lie my fucking ass off! Thank you.
some political insight...
And Misty, what will you do if YOU are elected class President?

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
Depleted uranium - U-238 - is a waste by-product of uranium enrichment
And is 40 per cent less radioactive than natural uranium, but remains radioactive for 4.5 billion years.
We've got some!
A whopping great pile of it! Wanna see?
Didn't think so.
Murcans. BOK BOK BOK BOK

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
truth is stranger than fiction
It’s 2004, yet still you hear, “Oh, racism is everywhere. There’s still so much racism!” Yet it’s mentalities like that that are mostly the problem today, not racism itself.
i can't even make up smack like this
Those who claim to be against racism are often the ones who perpetuate it the most. After all, you can always scream “fire” in a crowded theater and get a response. It doesn’t need to be true.
http://www.stater.kent.edu /stories_old/04spring/4104/icanshow.asp
"...Sadly, all the hype about racism these days is just that, hype. Disagree?"
OMG. Can't wait to e-mail afazio@kent.edu

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
you want separate WHAT
Party of 27. But we don't all need to be seated at the same table or anything.
that Saturday afternoon we were trying to find a restaurant on Bourbon Street
we've been drinking since Thursday
my blood sugar is getting low
i love my internet pals
I'll tell the others we're eating here...they're in the sextoy emporium next door...

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
HOW much Chinaco did you say?
We'll need seating for roughly 100 people. Separate checks.
that Saturday afternoon we were trying to find a restaurant on the Vegas Strip
we've been drinking since Thursday
my blood sugar is getting low
http://www.bartcop.com
i love ALL of my internet pals
the rest are coming up from the casino

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
the stirring sequel to "3 Days of the
i will be appearing as a fully engaged fact witness, here to testify in my own right and capacity with the White House
Condi" - "Honey, I Shrunk the Office"
I am not here in my capacity as a surrogate so much as I am qualified to give any testimony you may require at this security level.
er... sirs? The arrangement was for the President and the Vice President to actually testify...
you have got to be shitting me

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
The Infamous Bath and Body Shop
now kids, on this expedition, look but DON't TOUCH
we'll be looking at the various uses of herbs found in nature
Incident -- Right before my friend Tina
cool
my mom LOVES this place
and I stopped being Den Leaders
girls
my brother said I could come too...

 

by nuveeeeena
4-02-04
LEST WE FORGET
there's an old saying in hell tennesee texas i am sure also in levittown texas tennessee
fool me once fool me jeb fool me jeb what? what fool me shame .. shame on you ... fool me
...fool me tennessse texas also i mean tennessee in texas - you ... you ... you ... you don't you .... don't get fooled ... don't uh .... don't get fooled again!!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-04-04
MENSA membership is overrated
wrong speed media?
I just bought a new hi-speed DVD burner and a crate of 1X DVD-RWs Why won't it work? Why?!
particularly by its members
here's a link to the manual and an faq from the dvd usenet
shoulda known you low tech morons wouldn't know. stop wasting my time and TELL ME!!
well, this IS a political chatroom. but try RTFM
figures you assholes wouldn't know. nobody will give me a straight answer. dolts

 

by nuveeeeena
4-06-04
my kids share my interest in politics
Mom, wihat do you mean: "right-winger"
right-wingers are generally the Republicans and we're Dems and lefties.
but a damn winger is a Republican, right?
yes, sweetie. Also, they're the Red states and we're the Blue states
the kid is fairly astute...
yeek! well, yes and no...
woot Crips!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-06-04
It was revealed that in keeping with
You with Blackwater too?
Yep. Just came from orientation.
with privatization trends, many U.S.
I guess you saw the ad in Soldier of Fortune magazine?
Naw, I applied online through Monster.Com
troops in Iraq are mercenaries
The benefit package is pretty decent. We get a dental and vision plan.
i gotta record my mileage for billing. remind me later

 

by nuveeeeena
4-06-04
just a moment of your time, I'm with "Americans Coming Together". Can we count on your support this November?
Amercans Coming Together? Heh
?
can I get a T-shirt? BWAHAHAHAH!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
The other night, we had some clown named Kambodia wander into chat and start getting all combative ..
/join #bartcopchat
seems like Kambodia's photoshopped Condi photos were on bart's page one day
All right you dicks. Who stole my photoshopped stuff? It's on Fark! People work HARD on this stuff you know.
and I'm just tickled when someone LOOKS at my stuff...
what, you want... fame? royalties? a hand job? sheesh. cry me a fuckin river...

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
nuvee just doesn't understand my technical issues. nobody does.
The ACTUAL story...
my DVD was working! and I bought a crate of 1X DVDs for my OLD 1X DVD drive. I was worried that they would stop making them so I bought a boat load.
The newer ones don't work with my old drive. I got a message "this media is not supported" using my old drive.
snicker. thanks for clarifying!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
it's no coindence that we have all the commercials memorized
want a two day boner? Ask your doctor if new Viaciagralis is right for you
..and the Lincoln Bedroom is fetching the big bucks now...
thanks for the tax relief, George. i'll just let myself in the back door -- got my own key
glorp
MEANWHILE ON C-SPAN
imports are costing us thousands. damn bluehairs and their mexican lipitor...
...with revenues in excess of $9 billion annually, that's GOT to sting. *snort*

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
INVIGORATING AMERICA'S YOUTH
ZZZZZ
...and I just want to reitenerate that we will leave no child behind blah blah blah
Letterman got ahold of a clip that had the cutest kid yawning through a Bush campaign speech. it was hysterical
BLAHHAHHAHAHAHAHA!
let's take a look at President Bush INVIGORATING AMERICA'S YOUTH. Here's the clip...
continued....
I tell you that film was DOCTORED by Letterman's people.
er. okay Mr. Rove.. I'll let the CNN news desk know.

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
CNN trusted their White House source. BIG mistake.
WAIT! We've got CSPAN on the line! They have the original footage and it wasn't faked! That kid really WAS lolling about like that!
the clip, according to White House sources was faked and was just a big naughty prank.... no wait... this just in....
Letterman laughed off the libel
Heh. Doubt it.
I just got an apology from CNN for reporting that I was a liar. Do you think you can keep awake for all this, kid?
BACK IN THE OVAL OFFICE...
our message for this cycle is that our administration demonstrates leadership and responsibility.
I need more AA batteries for my Game Boy....

 

by nuveeeeena
4-07-04
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS CHAT
chicks groove on me. wheee. i'm god's gift to women
HEE HEE I've HEARD about all of YOU!
TRIPPING
hee hee well, sounds like you are having an affair. oh, and didn't YOU sleep with a homeless guy?
that was ME, you pud...
ahhhhhhh
you are SO high

 

by nuveeeeena
4-08-04
CHATTER IN SUMMER OF 2001: THERE WILL BE A VERY VERY VERY BIG UPROAR. A VERY BIG EVENT
The August 6th memo didn't tell us a thing.
08/06/01 Presidential Briefing: BIN LADIN DETERMINED TO ATTACK INSIDE UNITED STATES
IT WAS A STRUCTURAL PROBLEM with the COUNTRY
We weren't given the date or target. There was no way of coordinating the intelligence agencies.
Condi's testimony before the 9-11 commission was revealing, albeit sad and scary
I thought it was the PRESIDENT's JOB to synthesize high level intelligence. What the hell IS the Executive Branch responsible for?
Nobody told us what to do.

 

by nuveeeeena
4-08-04
The Bill of Rights has been officially
..there was a STRUCTURAL PROBLEM with the country before 9-11. That's why we didn't prevent the attacks.
it wasn't fascist enough for ya yet?
declared to be a Structural Problem;
I'm in being named Muhammed and for attending a peace protest. What are you in for?
my arrest warrant said: SEDITION
a bigtime pain in the Executive butt
my plan is clear and decisive. tap everyone's phone and shoot everyone who pisses us off
ix-Nay on the olicy-pay, Georgie

 

by nuveeeeena
4-08-04
aWol elaborates on his foreign policies
We are at WAR. This isn't a police action. This is W-O-R.
But the right to declare war is vested solely in Congress... we didn't authorize endless war
we did authorize him to use troops in Iraq to enforce UN resolutions against amassing WMDs
hyuk! no WMDs here, either!
I'm thinking: Bush-Reaper '04

 

by nuveeeeena
4-08-04
lurking, cooking dinner, talking to my kids and watching tv
bunch of freakin lurkers --- nuttin but lurkers and scripts and bots
lurkers?!?!? Where!?!
I'm watching the Condi Rice replay. Heck, she could teach Strom Thurmond a thing or two about filibusters.
When CondiLiar was yapping this morning, I had to try very hard to not go all Billy Jack on my radio.
http://www.bettybowers.com /condoleezza.html
lurkers and scripts and bots! oh my!!

 

by nuveeeeena
4-08-04
More highlights of foreign policy
I'm TIRED of swatting flies.
Oh yeah? How many flies HAVE you swatted? (flex)

Showing page 2.

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