All comics by tcjade

 

by tcjade
4-03-05
COUGH HACK COUGH COUGH!!!
Oh no! Tony is choking, what should we do?
Does anyone know how to do the Heimlich manuver?
Hey Tony throw yourself over that chair.

 

by tcjade
4-03-05
I think if you do the Heimlich correctly you break the sternum, right?
Wait, no that is CPR.
If i'm ever choking stay away from me...
...you'd probably come after me with a hammer!!!

 

by tcjade
4-17-05
I think i am going to bed.
well goodnight, goodnight, may you dream of whip cream and assorted fruits
HAHA! Jesse is an assorted fruit!!!
i don't know if that sounds good

 

by tcjade
4-27-05
Skeeetro: i don't know what i am talking about. Do you?
um, no i am just humpring you.
i mean HUMORING!!!
Skeeetro: hahahaha, freudian slip? :p
Darn qwerty keyboard

 

by tcjade
4-27-05
I think i'm going to cry
There's nothing worse than a crying girl.
Oh, i don't know, being on fire might rank up there too.

 

by tcjade
6-10-05
What should I name my cats?
I don't know...
What does jabberwalky mean?
I don't know...
We are not naming my cat jabberwalky

 

by tcjade
6-10-05
Jabberwocky - a nonsense poem from Lewis Carroll's "Through the Looking Glass."
Jemmy - baked sheep's head.
um...
Jib boom - a spar forming a continuation of the bowspirit and holding a job.
What?

 

by tcjade
6-10-05
oops, i dropped the lid to that bottle.
Go woosh it with concentrated HCl. Remember, we cannot haav eny contaminATion!
oops i dropped it again
um, 5 second rule?
Don't worry about it, it's not like you're eating it.

 

by tcjade
6-10-05
Inside Twiss's office
And you see the heterokonaphyta tend to exhibit a concentrated milcotynabulate when in situations blah blah blah...
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah, so what do you think Tiffany?
um...
You have nice eyes?

 

by tcjade
6-13-05
Tiffany's signature ring...doo doo doo doooooooodododododo...
Hey, whatcha up to?
Oh nothing. Who is this?
Kurt
Oh, sorry Kurt i didn't recognize your voice.
Wait, i don't know any Kurts.

 

by tcjade
6-13-05
...i know somehow i would mess it up...
Tiffany, what do you think you are doing?
My bottle of water got really warm so i dumped the rest overboard.
But we have very sensitive equipment down there in the water!!!
Oh, whoops, i didn't mean to dilute Lake Superior.

 

by tcjade
6-14-05
Is it hot in here or is it me?
It's definatley you.
Nice save...
Er, i mean, um we have been in quite the heat wave.

 

by tcjade
6-14-05
Tiffany walks to her apartment as Danny talks to Sheriff Chuck downstairs...
Well they say to love your neighbor...
...it's easy to love the good looking ones...
I CAN HEAR YOU!!!

 

by tcjade
6-19-05
Duh, Tiff.
Um, Tam...
I would watch yourself if i were you...
I have cotton balls and i know how to use them.

 

by tcjade
6-19-05
Tiffany zones out again...
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
oh no, all i can think about is that comic i made where he is saying "blah blah blah."
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
Must not laugh, must not smile...
What is she smiling about???
hehehehehehe...

 

by tcjade
6-21-05
1. Check First 2. Use the Buddy System...
3. No, Go, Tell...
I don't even want to know.

 

by tcjade
6-21-05
How DO you start a siphon???
I thought you blow in it to build up pressure.
No, i am pretty sure you suck on it.
Maybe you do both.
You can show me later.
Um...no.

 

by tcjade
6-21-05
I don't think so, Dave...
Yeah, i am pretty sure you blow...
...and then quick suck in to get it to come.
Uh...

 

by tcjade
6-21-05
You should come with us on the boat tomorrow, it will be fun.
Okay, i will ask Twiss if i can go!
Hey, if i get up early and get all my work done in the lab, can i go with you guys on the boat tomorrow?
No, i don't think so, there are already going to be 3 people.
What the heck, now we can't fit more than 3 people on a 25-foot boat?

 

by tcjade
6-22-05
Dr. Twiss wouldn't take me on the boat even though i have been DYING to go.
well that sucks.
PROTEST! Heck no, we won't go!!!
But, that is the problem, i DO want to go.
Er, good point...

 

by tcjade
6-27-05
It's a hot Saturday afternoon, and Tiffany notices Twiss's office door open...it's the first time she sees him in a tank top...
HOLY CRAP!!! I don't know whether to scream or laugh hysterically!
It looks like a squirrel died on his arms!!!
Hi Tiffany, how are you today?
Must not look, must not look

 

by tcjade
6-28-05
Why do girls always travel to the bathroom together?
How many girls dows it take to go to the bathroom?
How many girls are there?

 

by tcjade
6-28-05
Sometimes we talk to much during movies, or just get distracted...
Wait, what did the blind girl just say?
What, she's blind?
Yes she's blind, haven't you been watching the movie?
Um, no...
Actually i was watching the fish tank

 

by tcjade
6-30-05
Our weekly lab meeting at Maxfield's...
Two beers walk into a bar...
...one got drunk.
Get it? One got DRUNK. HAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHA

 

by tcjade
6-30-05
I don't think Christel's insurance covers Sonya attacks.
Yeah it does, she pays $10 extra a month for that.
OW!!! YOU JUST BIT ME!!! i don't have Sonya insurance!!!
Then don't stick your hand in my face.

 

by tcjade
7-07-05
I don't feel good. Why should i have to go help Christel in the lab if Twiss is there?
Well you know...
He is probably busy scratching his head.

 

by tcjade
7-07-05
Where are my keys? Aw, man where are they?
Where ARE my KEYS?!
Here, hold my keys so i can check my pockets for my keys.
Um...

 

by tcjade
7-09-05
Twiss seems to be in a strange mood...
Hey pumpkin! Can i call you pumpkin?
I'm going to go cut Tiffany's hair!!!
What is he on today?

 

by tcjade
7-11-05
Too much time driving...
Why do we yawn?
I don't really know.
They are so contagous they even cross the species barrier...
...I see my dog yawn and then i yawn.

 

by tcjade
7-15-05
Tiffany introduces Christel to some of the local biota...
Have you seen those big spiders that float on the water yet?
No, and i hope i never do.
They are really big, like tarantulas, so i wonder how they stay afloat.
Probably a large surface area, and a lot of hairs.
hmmm. I bet Michael would float well.

 

by tcjade
7-19-05
It was a slap in the face, how quickly i was replaced...

 

by tcjade
7-19-05
There is a new study out on pick up lines...
It says that with proper body language, “Hello” works most of the time for men and all of the time for women...
I think that is more evidence that men really aren't listening to what women say anyway.

 

by tcjade
8-09-05
Tiffany talks to Cloudie...
Ya know, Cloud, my other cats are really dumb.
Well it doesn't take much intelligence to wake up at some point during the day, eat food, then find a nice place to sleep again.
hmmm...sounds like life before i started working.

 

by tcjade
8-09-05
Dave takes the cake for bad days...
Talk about bad days. I woke up late, busted my head open on my bed post...
Got stung by a bee at the dock, and i'm allergic...
Then we got the boat stuck on the rocks and burned the trucks clutch trying to pull us out.

 

by tcjade
8-10-05
Talk about bad days. I woke up late, busted my head open on my bed post...
Got stung by a bee at the dock, and i'm allergic...
Then we got the boat stuck on rocks and burnt out the truck's clutch trying to pull it out.
Well i have good new! I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico!!!

 

by tcjade
8-11-05
I wonder which situation Twiss finds more embarassing...
Walking into a store with a female student and buying only Vaseline...or...
Driving the truck into the lake, AGAIN!!!

 

by tcjade
10-24-05
You can tell what someone thinks of you by the movies they let you borrow...
Tiffany, I have this movie i think you will really like...
It's called "Ella Enchanted" and it reminds me of you.
Oh and Sonya, here is one for you, it's "Jackass"

 

by tcjade
10-24-05
Microbiota such as bacteria are essential for the breakdown and recycling of elements that living beings need...
...They have been recycling important elements such as C, N, O, and P generation after generation.
So what you are trying to say is "I breathe dead people."

 

by tcjade
11-01-05
The microbe will then divide, he is, er, she...
Microbes don't have sexes!
Sure they do.
Positive and negative don't count.
Stop it, you're making me blush...

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