All comics by wazzdakka

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by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG 50
Ok, now, how are we gonna do this exactly? We have no instrumental skill.
You sing, and I'll clap and say "Na na na" from time to time.
You can't clap. Your legs can't touch each other.
Stop making fun of my handicap you son of a bitch.
Oh yeah, STG 50 is done... coming along nicely :)
Fine, just do your "Na na na" thing and shut up already. You sure are uppity for a bug...
You sure are ugly for a goat.

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG 51
All right, the song looks good.
Na na na... Na na na...
What are you doing...?
Warming up. So what's this song called?
Coming up next: N*Goat's first song...
Hot Goat Lovin'.
It is in no way relevant to the song. It's perfect.

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG 52 - Thanks to Alekenisis on Portent for the song lyrics, the man is a genius :)
I was once called Billy, but that name was silly,
Na nana na na....
So now I'm Bance Lass, my words ain't so crass
Na nana na na...
There's more...
That I can't see that you love me, cuz I know that you see...
Na nana na na...

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG 53 The song continues...
What's between you and I, you're making the goat cry!
Na nana na na...
Bay-bee! Oh yeah! Bay-bee! Oh yeah!
Nana na naaaa....
*standing ovation*
See, if we actually had an audience, they'd be clapping for us and cheering.
I'm sure you meant slapping us, and jeering.

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG 54 - A little Garth Brooks ripoff called The Goat Strolls
Three thirty in the morning, Not a roach in sight
The hill's lookin' like a ghost town On a moonless summer night
Raindrops on the green grass, There's a goat movin' in
He's headin' back from somewhere That he never should have been
To be continued...
And the goat strolls...
And the goat strolls

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG # 55 - More of The Goat Strolls
Every firefly is shinin' All across the place

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG #56 - Sorry about that, I accidentally hit enter...
Every firefly is shinin' All across the place
He's pacin' by the table With a scowl on his face
Askin' for miracle Hopin' he's not right
Prayin' it's the drugs That's kept him out all night
More to come still...
And the goat strolls...
And the goat strolls

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG #57 - The Goat Strolls part 4
The goat strolls
And the lightnin' strikes
Another goat grows old
On a sleepless night
Still coming...
As the goat strolls on Out of control
Deep in his heart The goat strolls

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG #58 - Part 5 of The Goat Strolls
Gary's waitin' by the window When he strolls into the kitchen
He rushes out to meet him Thankful he's not bitchin'
But on the grassy field A strange new perfume blows
And the lightnin' flashes in his eyes And he knows that Gary knows
One more verse...
And the goat strolls...
And the goat strolls

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG #59 - The Goat Strolls' Conclusion
The goat strolls
And the lightnin' strikes
Another goat grows old
On a sleepless night
(done)
As the goat strolls on Out of control
Deep in his heart The goat strolls

 

by wazzdakka
10-06-02
STG #60
That was beautiful.
I sang. I actually sang.
Our next one will be on stage, I think...
And I didn't even suck!
I wouldn't go that far.
Shut up, ugly.

 

by wazzdakka
10-11-02
STG #61
Ok, I sent off our recording to the studio. Now it's just a matter of time before -
- we become huge! Famous! RICH!!! HAHAHAHA!!!
We will be the greatest ever! We will rule the entire music industry!
I was gonna say, till they realize we're a goat and a bug and turn us down.
Killjoy.

 

by wazzdakka
10-11-02
STG #62
Now, they're not gonna turn us down just because of who we are.
Why?
Well they have LAWS against that sort of thing, don't they?
*Gary's opinion does not necessarily represent that of the author, who feels that cockroaches are actually far superior to lawyers.
What are you gonna do? Hire a cockroach lawyer?
That's basically ALL lawyers, isn't it?*

 

by wazzdakka
10-11-02
STG #63 - Some days later
Hah! I got a letter from the studio!
Hehe...
There's no illustration of a goat reading a letter, but let's just pretend that I'm reading this...
READ IT BITCH! READ IT!!!!
They're not going to have us make more and make an album. They want to release The Goat Strolls as a single.
A... a... a single? Wow...

 

by wazzdakka
10-11-02
STG #64
Now, until our song hits the market, we've got a few things to do.
Yeah, no kidding. We need to spread the word!
We'll put up signs and billboards...
I'll learn how to write my name, so I can autograph!
I'll kill Garth Brooks before he sues us for stealing his song.
Also a good idea. I'll go rob a bank so we've got lawsuit money in case you fail.

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #65 - At least I THINK it's 65... anyways, 1 Week Later...
That was amazing. 1 week and The Goat Strolls is at the top of the charts.
I have so much money it's not even funny anymore. People keep coming up to me on the street and asking for a loan.
Same with me, till I found a way to distract people while I ran away.
How'd you do that?
Wow! A Toothgnip dummy! I want one!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #66
I just keep feeling like we forgot to do something...
Like what?
Something we were supposed to get done before the song hit the airwaves...
Uh-oh...
Oh no.
Yup. No one Garth Brooks.

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #67 - For the record, that last quote from Gary should have said, no one KILLED Garth Brooks...
Hmm....
Hello, Toothgnip. I'm Garth Brooks, you song-stealing bastard.
I'm not afraid of you. You may be exceedingly wealthy and carrying a gun, but I have the ultimate weapon.
Ha! Like what, goat boy?
Can I talk to him now?? Please?
Go right ahead... hehehe...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #68
Howdy, pardner.
What? Shut up. Where's the goat?
It's just you, me, and my horribly annoying, sarcastic, cheesy-joke personality.
Wait a minute...
Now you are all mine...
Hey, now, let's talk this over...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #69
Hey! Wanna hear a joke!?
What? No! I'm here because-
Too bad, what do you call cheese that's not yours?
Cheese that's not mine? What's that got to do with-
NACHO CHEESE!! HAHAHA!!!
NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #70
Haha... I love that one... so are you gay, or do just like the whole cowboy thing?
I'm - wait a minute, bug...
Yup, I figured. Gay.
Well I - Hey! Stop that! Why are you so damn annoying?
If Satan couldn't make me quit, what the hell chance do you have, Gaylord? You don't mind if I call you Gaylord, do you?
Ah, God, shut up already!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #71
Admit it, Gaylord, your powers cannot succeed when stacked against my annoyance factor.
Dammit, stop calling me Gaylord, bitch!
Bitch? Now THAT'S original.
I need to see the goat, now shut up and move!
Butch Cassidy called, he wants his hat back.
Yeah? Well... um... dammit, this would be easier if you wore clothes...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STg #72
Hey, wanna hear me sing Bette Midler?
No! Not that! Anything but that!
Did you ever know that you're my hero...
NOOO!!! STOP IT!!! I swear, I'll shoot!
What? You're threatening me with violence? That's it, I'm suing!
I'm here to sue you dammit! Argh! Toothgnip!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #73
So how about this, Tonto...
Tonto wasn't a cowbo-
SHUT UP!! AHH!!!! Look out!!! Behind you!!!
What?!?!
HAHAHAHA!!!! Man, I can't believe you actually looked! That's the oldest trick in the book!
Oh my God... please, just stop it...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #74 - Sorry, forgot to name the last one...
Want to hear the most annoying sound ever?
No!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEE..............
Ahh! My ears!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE....
Stop! Stop!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #75
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE....
ENOUGH ALREADY!!!! SHUT UP WITH THAT INFERNAL NOISE!!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.....
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
EEEEEEEEEE...... COOL!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #76 - No More Garth
Now THAT'S just cool.
Nice, Gary. I never thought your annying-ness would actually pay off.
Hehehe... stupid Garth...
So can you just do that at will?
Used correctly, I can destroy celebrities all over the world...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STg #77
What the...?
Wow... that was freaky... hey where am I...?
Aaa.... Garth Brooks... We've been waiting for you... BWUAHAHAHA!!!!
NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What the hell was that noise...? Ah, who cares.

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STG #78
Well, here we are. N*Goat is famous to the point where we never have to do anything again.
PLUS, as a bonus, we killed Garth Brooks.
So now what you want to do?
Well we never really did much before.
Dude. We blew up Taiwan at one point.
Ah, Independance Day...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
General Randomness Part 1
Hello. I am a bird.
I prefer cheese.
EEEEEEEEEE.....

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
HAHAHA
HAHAHA
Wow! Purpleness!
Bite me.

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
Moo.
Cluck.
OOOOGA!!!
Why am I getting hot?

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
Random Comic #1
Blah blah blah blah blah...
Dear God make him shut up already...
Blah blah blah...
Oh my God. How can one person be that annoying?
Blah blah blah blah...
No.... NOO... I can STILL HEAR HIM...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
Blah blah blah...
I can't take it anymore... maybe I can subtley escape...
Blah blah blah blah blah blah...
Now what...?
Blah blah blah...!
Now, to crawl away to freedom!

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
Blah blah blah blah...
I can't get him off me... it's time for drastic measures...
Blah blah blah! Blah blah blah...
'Tis a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done... or something... ok, enough drama!
blah... blah.... blah...

 

by wazzdakka
10-12-02
STg #79... took a little break to make some random stuff, now, back to the original :)
Well Portent remains down.
The bastards. Let's kill them.
That won't help the process of bringing it back.
No, but it'll make me temporarily happy.
What about after that, when Portent ceases to exist forever?
I live in the "now", my goat friend...

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #80 - More Portent Bitchin'
I know, i'm sitting here bitching about Portent being down, but you know what?
What's that?
As soon as Portent is back up, I'll stop bitching because the author will be too busy posting to make cartoons at random.
Ah... God bless Wazz's laziness...
I say God bless Portent's crack-like addictiveness...

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #81
Wow... strip #81...
243 panels of people watching us do a whole lot of nothing.
Nothing? What nothing? We've done all kinds of stuff!
Haha... stupid Garth...
Besides killing Garth Brooks.
But THAT was the highlight!

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #82
This is a goat.
Hehehehehehe.... drugs are GOOD...
This is a goat on drugs.
This has been an informative public service announcement, care of WazzArts, Inc.
You decide.

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #83
See, now this is neat.
What's that, Toothy?
Well it's like the old days again. No unification between one strip and the next.
Ah... pure, original, undiluted See The Goat.
And don't call me Toothy.
No problem, Mr. Gnip.

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #84
Now here's a question... if we both started out as goats, why are we in the middle of a field?
As opposed to....?
Well there IS a mountain background.
Ah... because this doesn't look as good.
Agreed. Bring on the Grassy background, Mr. Goat!

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #85
Ah, much better.
I missed you grass.
And stop calling me Mr. Goat.
What do I call you then!?
Why does it matter?? We're the only characters in this strip!
I think Death and Satan might disagree with that.

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #86 - I realize a minor typo in my last title...
Haha! Look at that!
Deat and Satan? Who is Deat you idiot?
It's ok. Once, he referred to Satan as "Stan."
Oh, I'm gonna call him Stan from now on just to piss him off.
You DO realize we're talking about the Devil here, right?
Hasn't stopped me before. I am a cockroach. I fear nothing.

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
Hehe... well I'll be damned... our author has hit a new low in laziness.
You didn't even change us from the DEFAULT SETTINGS?
Nope.
You MONSTER! I HATE BEING ASIAN GIRL 2!
Haha, I got Asian Girl 1.
Shut up before I kick you in the head! HEY! COOL! I CAN REACH YOUR HEAD NOW!

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #88 - Don't worry, that won't happen again...
Haha. I'm taller than you again.
Shut up, ugly.
...for at least 5 minutes ;)
Damn, we're almost to STG #100.
Wow... milestone time...
And just think... no one on portent is here to see this momentus occasion...
You hear that, Nick? IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!! HAHAHA!!!

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #89
Well we COULD go to Dark Millennia...
Yeah but we were just there. It's empty.
Yeah, what's up with that?
I don't know. Maybe they hate me.
Maybe? What maybe?
Well I was trying to sound self-confident... *sniff*

 

by wazzdakka
10-13-02
STG #90
Woot! STG #90! Yeah! Only 10 more!
Someone tell our idiot author he managed to misspell "STG" in the title.
Oops, thanks Gary.
No problem.
Loser.
Dammit! I help him out and I'm STILL a bug!

Showing page 2.

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