All comics by edoggydog

 

by edoggydog
6-09-07
She's still laughing at me. I'm going to go over there and kick her fucking ASS!
Groovy!
[kick, punch, bite] "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"
You go, boy-eeee!
She must work out.
Yeah.

 

by edoggydog
6-25-07
Okay... Enough of this SHIT! I'm going to go over there, yell out my secret power word, and kick that bitch's ASS!
Groovy!
"Sha-ZAM!" [kick, punch, bite] "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"
Hmm... I think he needs a different power word.
Hey, Stan... How where those Lakers tickets I got you?
Should I tell him what I really did last night?

 

by edoggydog
6-26-07
So, this midget, kike, butt-ranger and eggplant walk into a bar and- what is it, Clango?
Don't get short with me!
Oy vay!
Groovy!
Who's that pecker-wood calling an "eggplant"?

 

by edoggydog
7-19-07
So, an Autobot walks into a bar...
...and the bartender says, "Beat it, you fucking TRANNY!"
============ SPLORT! ==========
HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA...
Groovicon!

 

by edoggydog
7-30-07
My owner's sister has a tattoo on her left breast...
Couldn't one call that a "tittoo"?
If so, then she also has a "armtoo", a "backtoo" and an "asstoo"...

 

by edoggydog
7-31-07
IT IS TIME TO END THE WORLD AND REMAKE IT FROM THE START!
OH, GOD NOOOOOOOO!!
Groovy!
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
8-02-07
Hey John?
Yeah, John?
Wanna hear a joke?
Sure...
This blind whore wanders onto a farm and starts giving a bull a handjob, and the farmer says-
Sorry. I'm not into "bathroom" humor...

 

by edoggydog
8-03-07
So, if you're not into "bathroom" humor... What kind of humor do you like?
"Slap-dick"...
Don't you mean "slap-STICK"?
No, slap-dick...
What's "slap-dick'?
When some guy's taking a piss, and he's standing too close to the bowl, I drop the lid down on his johnson! HAHAHAHAHAHA It's a RIOT!

 

by edoggydog
8-03-07
Hey, John... Do you like "groaners"...
Okay... [*sigh*] Let's hear it.
If, you're an American standing outside a public restroom. What are you when you're inside the restroom?
Let me guess... "I'm-a-peein'"?
That's supposed to be, "European", asshole!
You gonna cry like a little bitch? Huh, John? Are, ya? Cry, bitch, CRY! *WAAAAAAAAH*

 

by edoggydog
8-03-07
I'm so tired of everyone pissing on me!
Hellooooo... You're a TOILET!
Oh.
Dumbass!

 

by edoggydog
8-04-07
[ *Groovy! ]
Ejole! When they said thees course had a high "slope" rating, I thought they meant eet was muy deefeecult!
Furdy yerkin!*

 

by edoggydog
8-17-07
Wanna licky my "pussy"?
GROOVY!
Meow?
Ha, ha! Hold on...
*purrrrrrrr*

 

by edoggydog
8-21-07
( 9:03:34 a.m. )
I read a news story on Yahoo! that cats' short-term memories only last ten minutes. Have you ever heard such bullshit?
( 9:13:35 a.m. )
I read a news story on Yahoo! that cats' short-term memories only last ten minutes. Have you ever heard such bullshit?
( 9:23:36 a.m. )
I read a news story on Yahoo! that cats' short-term memories only last ten minutes. Have you ever heard such bullshit?

 

by edoggydog
8-21-07
Sorry, dude... I get these here "Double-D" twins, and you get NONE!
Groovy!
Looks like it's you and me, sister!
I think I'll stay celibate...

 

by edoggydog
9-11-07
Some lady on the radio said that global warming is a "choice"...
Cool!
I choose global warming!

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-17-07

 

by edoggydog
9-19-07

 

by edoggydog
10-09-07
If, one goose is called a "goose", and many are called "geese"...
...then wouldn't it follow that if one Korean is called a "gook", and many would be called "geek"?
Nevermind...

 

by edoggydog
10-09-07
Want to know a great way to meet women?
Groovy!
Buy yourself a toy poodle and take it with you every-where you go...
Gotcha!
(Three months later...)
Well? Did the toy poodle work?
Not only did it NOT meet any women, but I developed a bad case of carpal tunnel syndrom from constantly winding the little fucker!

 

by edoggydog
10-09-07
You have reach the help line for Gambler's Anonymous...
Groovy!
Do you have a gambling problem?
Yes. How should I play pocket jacks, pre-flop, in early postion?
[ CLICK ]
Hello?

 

by edoggydog
10-15-07
♫ She's got the cat-yack fever... ♫
YAAAAAAACK!
♫ ...cat-yack fever... ♫
YAAAAAAACK!
♫ You gave her cat-yack fever... ♫
What?

 

by edoggydog
10-15-07
...and that's when I trapped the guy into "pushing all in"!
Groovy!
So, when did you take up no-limit hold 'em?
What's no limit hold 'em?
?

 

by edoggydog
10-30-07
edoggydog ripping off themushwoom ripping off kane2742:
♫ If wuvving you is wong, then I don't wanna be WHITE. ♫
Your wish is my command... SHAZAM!!
OUCH!
What da fuck just happened? All of a sudden I have a craving for chicken and a forty of Ole E!

 

by edoggydog
10-31-07
Here, I'll show it to you...
Groovy!
"Beam Me Up, Dad"?
What do you think?
Cool bumper sticker!

 

by edoggydog
10-31-07
Do you know why Brad always defaults to us when he's testing the system?
No. But, if you hum a few bars, I'll fake it!
I'm being serious, here!
Me, too! Hum, bitch, HUMMMMMMMM!!
You're such a little CUNT!
I don't hear no humming, bitch!

 

by edoggydog
10-31-07
I would really like to know why Brad always uses us to test the system...
Maybe, he has a fetish for under-aged, flat-chested Asian girls...
Do you know this for a fact?
No. But, if you hum a few bars...
Oh, God! Here we go again...
HUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!

 

by edoggydog
10-31-07
I just spoke to Brad and-
HUMMMMMMMM!
Will you stop with humming!
Okay.
Now, as I was saying before you rudely interrupt-
*BUUUUUUURP*

 

by edoggydog
11-05-07
I want you to take off my top and fondle the "twins" for a minimum of thirty-five minutes....
Groovy!
Then, I'll tit-slap you until your face is bruised and swollen. After that, I'll reach down, grab your joint and massage it until...
Whoops! She must be talking to someone else on one of those bluetooth cell phone earpieces... How embarrasing!
Hey! Where you going? Don't you wanna go back to my place and screw?

 

by edoggydog
11-16-07
Dude... I think I met the "one" last night!
Groovy!
She doesn't seem to be like all those psychotic "she-devils' I've been meeting lately. And, what's really neat is her name is Hellen, spelled with two L's...
Not a "she-devil"? Dude, you can't say her name without saying "hell" first!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
Seemed obvious to me...

 

by edoggydog
11-20-07
I hate the term "pussy fart"...
[ *BRAAAAAAP!* ]
I prefer the term "feline flatulant"...
[ *sniff, sniff* ] What's that horrible smell?? AH, JESUS F. CHRIST!! LAY OFF THE BAKE BEANS, YOU STUPID FUCKING CAT!!

 

by edoggydog
11-20-07
Hey, Francis...
ZZZZZZZZZ- *snort* What is it, Lemuel?
How can we be called butterflies, when we're actually lactose intolerant?
You woke me up for this? *YAWN*
And, come to think of it, we're not even flies!
You're a fucking genius, Lemuel!

 

by edoggydog
11-20-07
I buried the bodies where no one woud find them...
Groovy!
...in mandingo's comics! HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA

 

by edoggydog
11-20-07
Hey, Francis...
Yes, Lemuel?
I saw this rad show on Fox last night called, When Backgrounds Talk.
Really?
Yeah... And, when the show was over, the kitchen table started talking, too!
Um, have you been cross-pollenating "magic" mushrooms again?

 

by edoggydog
11-21-07
Ahhhh-CHOO!!
Gesundheit!
Comes out loose!
?
(Three days later...)
Oh, I get it! HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA...

 

by edoggydog
11-21-07
Ahhhhhhhh-CHOOOOOOO!!!
You seem to be sneezing a lot lately... Are you getting sick, Lemuel?
Nahhhh. It's just my allergies acting up...
Really? To what are you allergic?
Pollen.
???

 

by edoggydog
11-22-07
When I woke up the morning after my horrific car accident...
... I discovered I was now a grandmother clock.
That sucks, dude. I mean, MA'AM...
We will return to When Backgrounds Talk, here on Fox after these messages...
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
11-22-07
...and then the Chinese take the same money we send them for cheap goods and plastic trinkets, and use it to fin-ance our national debt by buying U.S. up savings bonds...
...which devalues the dollar, increas-ing the trade deficit even greater, sad-dling future unborn generations with trillions in unabated debt! Doesn't this worry you, Lemuel?
What can I say? I'm just another niggah trying to get my nut!
*sigh* Welcome to America!

 

by edoggydog
12-05-07
Dude... I just read a few of Mandingo's latest comics!
Groovy!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I hafta go use your bathroom...
By my guest.

 

by edoggydog
12-05-07
Hey, Francis...
What is it, Lemuel?
I just heard that, despite earlier reports, Iran is not, in fact, enriching Iranians...
Um, it wasn't that were not enriching Iranians. They were not enriching urani-
...I mean, with all that oil they have, you'd they'd give a lot of the money to the people!
Did you fall down the stupid stairs and hit your head on every step?

 

by edoggydog
12-05-07
...and that's when I decided to stop spreading, "I Can't Believe It's Not Butterflies" on my morning bagel.
ZZZZZZZZZZ
Um, you awake, Francis?
ZZZZZZZ-*snort*. Did you say some-thing, Lemuel? *YAWWWWWN*
Yes.... You must have been sleep-flying again. Didn't I tell you to lay off the Lunesta?

 

by edoggydog
12-07-07
I just talked to my manager, and he said the customer is always wrong....
Groovy!
And, you're okay with that?
Whatever...
Dude, we're already to the third panel, and you haven't said anything funny yet. You seem to be just going through the motions...
What do you expect after 996 lame-ass comics?

 

by edoggydog
12-07-07
Welcome to McDumbass, where we give you the opportunity to win a free meal if you correctly answer a simple math problem...
Groovy!
What is the cube root of 19,683?
That's easy! Twenty-six...
WRONG!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

by edoggydog
12-27-07
Mey, Mohn.... Mid moo mave a mood Mistmas?
What was that, John?
Mid moo mave a mood Mistmas?
Sorry, dude... I can't understand a word you're saying!
[ *FLUSH* ] I said, did you have a good Christmas?
Yes, and you shouldn't talk with your mouth full...

 

by edoggydog
12-27-07
Well, here we are... Comic number 1000!
Groovy!
It's been a long and bumpy road, but we somehow made it!
Word. That'll show all those assholes who laughed at us!
Um, they were supposed to laugh. We're a comic strip, dildo-breath!
Oh.

Showing page 20.

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