All comics by DragonXero

Profile

 

by DragonXero
2-26-07
Some people have normal thoughts.
Did I remember to turn the oven off?
Others, however..
Shit, I missed my damned ride.
Have other issues to worry about...
Doo doo do doo doo do doo do doo do doo doo do doo do... Mahna Mahna... Do doo do do do!

 

by DragonXero
2-28-07
So, the assholes who run Butte College want to ban smoking on campus.
You use one little cigarette to light one little fire in one little chemistry lab and they wanna crucify you...

 

by DragonXero
3-09-07
So, you seen the "nigger guy" episode of South Park yet?
Haha...
My favorite part was when he just blurted out "NIGGERS"
...
What?

 

by DragonXero
3-13-07
*whisper* *whisper* *vagina* *whisper* *sneak*
Yeah. Yeah. Okay...
*whisper* *ass* *whisper*
STOP TELLING ME TO DO THINGS!

 

by DragonXero
3-19-07
*whisper whisper horse whisper anus*
Um, yeah?
*whisper dog whisper midget hooker*
STOP TELLING ME TO DO THINGS!

 

by DragonXero
3-21-07
WE ARE FROM THE FUTURE!
THE FUTURE!
WE CAN MAKE A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH IN LESS THAN 10 SECONDS!
BE AMAZED!
WE HAVE ELIMINATED THE NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!
NOT ENTIRELY!

 

by DragonXero
3-21-07
I did not realize you spoke Federation in your time. Anyway, all our children's programming is live-action and all our adult programs are cartoons.
Even porno!
We have cured all diseases!
Except being a douche.
We have used advanced technology to gain control over the weather!
People still complain.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-07
In the future, we fly in giant spaceships despite the laws of physics saying the size of the spaceships is impossible!
We rewrote the laws!
We have no need for contraception, we can decide when our bodies are capable of reproduction!
My wife is never ready!
Yeah, well, here in the 21st century we still require money. Pay up.
Ensign, set phasers to "puree" and start running.

 

by DragonXero
4-03-07
A few things about bisexual women, guys. First off, a bi girl is likely just pretending to be bi because it's cool. That means no sexy sexy.
Secondly, dating bisexual doesn't mean she will have a threesome with you. It just means she's got twice as many people to cheat on you with.
And finally, even if she did want a threesome, I assure you, it's highly unlikely that it would be sexy.
I enjoy sex with your girlfriend. Often.

 

by DragonXero
4-14-07
I don't think the FCC is a constitutional organization. I think their job could be covered better and more constitutionally by other government bodies.
Content? That's FTC domain. False advertising. The ATF is also ridiculous.
If someone wants to sell me booze, cancer or boomsticks, I think that's their right. First and second amendment as well as the declaration of independence.

 

FASTER! FASTER!
by DragonXero, 5-01-07

 

by DragonXero
5-01-07
Welcome aboard!
Well?
I saw what you were doing in the copy room. I'm not touching that hand.

 

The black Spider-Man was annoying.
Oh so now a brotha just annoyin' cuz he black?
by DragonXero, 5-13-07

 

by DragonXero
6-04-07
You see, that's not my problem.
Yes it is! How is it not your problem?!
Look, if it were my problem, I'd be doing something about it, wouldn't I?
Well...
And I'm not doing something about it. Therefore, it's not my problem. It's yours now.
Fuck.

 

by DragonXero
6-04-07
Okay, I've decided that it's your problem again because I'm not going to do anything about it.
Sorry, doesn't work that way.
That's how you said it!
But see, you're trying to pass it off now, so you are doing something about it.
FUCK!
Now get me a coffee.

 

by DragonXero
6-04-07
Listen, you either do it or there will be consequences.
Not my problem.
You're fired.
I hate that bastard.

 

by DragonXero
7-13-07
Would you stop smoking and drinking sodas?
Sure. Got no big problem with that.
And come exercise with me.
... Suuure...
Days Later...
I can't start a relationship with someone I want to change so much already. I'm so sorry.
Donkey farts.

 

by DragonXero
7-16-07
JESUS CAR IT'S A CHRIST, GET IN THE LION!
What?
I said you're a cunt, I'm dumping you.
Oh.

 

by DragonXero
8-17-07
You know, the height of conciet is calling out your own name during orgasm.
Oh, I do that.
Yeah?
"Oh God!"

 

by DragonXero
10-12-07
Hi there, can I-
I'm a lesbian.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT ON A STICK WITH JESUS! A FUCKING LESBIAN! JESUS FUCKING HOMOSEXUAL CHRIST HOW FUCKING AWESOME!
I, uh-
I FUCKING LOVE LESBIANS, YOU CHICKS ARE FUCKING AWESOME! WE SHOULD GO WATCH CHICKS TOGETHER!
I'll... I'll leave.

 

by DragonXero
10-12-07
Alright. I got a new MX Revolution. Sweet, lithium ion battery!
What the... OH HOLY FUCKING SHIT YEAH! THIS FUCKING MOUSE FREESCROLLS! SHIT YES! I CAN'T CLICK MOUSE3 WITH THIS THING, FUCK YES!
FUCK YEAH, NO MIDDLE-CLICK IS FUCKING AWESOME, WE SHOULD GO, LIKE, PLAY FIRST PERSON SHOOTERS TOGETHER!
I... I'll leave now.

 

by DragonXero
10-12-07
...
Dude... are.. are you okay?
I... I've just seen God.
The hell are you playing?
Call of Duty 4 demo. I just came.

 

by DragonXero
12-26-07
Max, this is an optical illusion or something, right?
I don't think so man.
So.. my car's really not there.
That's the long and short of it.
Well, at least the pizza place is only two blocks away.
The gate's locked. Make that four.

 

by DragonXero
12-26-07
Well, this is lovely. December 24th and my car's been stolen.
It could be worse...
How?
The pizza place could be closed.
DUDE, don't even joke about that.
I know, sorry.

 

I think I have tennis elbow.
But you don't play ten-OHHHHH
by DragonXero, 1-25-08

 

by DragonXero
3-20-08
*Translated from human tongue
(im gonna pwn u n00b)*
You crit ipwnurnubz for 1125 holy damage. ipwnurnubz dies.
And then *that* happened.

 

by DragonXero
3-20-08
u wanna heal 4 rfd? we have 3 other wars. just need healz
Four warriors and a paladdin whose heal spells suck?
Yeah.
You really like repairing your armor, don't you?

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
OOOH SHINY!
Hey, wait, don-
AUGH! OH GOD! IT'S EATING MY SPINE!
Have fun with that.
One res later...
WHY DIDN'T YOU SAVE ME ASSHOLE?!
I don't have 2g to drop on armor repairs because I died pulling mobs off your idiot ass.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
Need Roll -2, Won by Imacompleteidiot
WOOHOO!
Dude. You're a hunter. You can't even wear plate.
I can sell it on the auction house.
So can the rest of us.
But I need gold!!!
The fight with that boss is going to cost me 3x what that item gets on the auction house.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
stop telling ppl wat 2 do! i haev an 70!!! i no wat im doin!
Then why have I had to rez you 6 times since we got in here?
You just suck as a tank!
And you suck as a human being.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
ok guys i got the stuff i needed! peace!
But you're our puller! I- goddammit.
HEY PRIEST! GUESS WHO'S THE NEW BAIT?
Fucking ranged attack class...

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
*stab*
*UrKH*
TooPussyToFightOwnLevel spits on you
BUR! Dalingra orni karash difa!
Fucking rogues.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
HaHaIm12LevelsAboveYou wants to duel you:
No, no thanks.
DoesntGetTheFuckingHint wants to duel you:
I said no dammit! Leave me alone!
IncessantIdiotWithNothingBetterToDo wants to duel you:
Bokk bgok!!! Chicken!
No, I just value my gold.

 

by DragonXero
3-21-08
WOOHOO! One more kill and this guy's dead! Honor, here I come!
WOOHOO!!! *slice*
Lvl70NinjaKiller hits GuyAtMyLevel for 25000. GuyAtMyLevelDies
2 hours fighting another paladin... 2 fucking hours.

 

by DragonXero
4-01-08
I'm a paladin. There, I said it. I get holy spells, plate armor and the ability to use almost any weapon.
Of course, my spells use up a lot of mana, my armor's rarely enough, I can't use ranged weapons and I hit like a bitch.
But at least I'm not one of those hippie druids.

 

by DragonXero
5-06-08
I was running around trying to...
Yeah. Mmm hmm..
Are you listening to me?
Oh no she di'int! Really? I'm sorry to hear th-
I'LL FUCK YOU WITH A RAKE

 

by DragonXero
9-11-08
Sarah Palin is one smokin' hot MILF. I wouldn't vote for her, but damn, I'd fuck her.
Why the hell don't restraining orders have time limits?!

 

by DragonXero
9-11-08
I'm going to start a place where you can shoot guns, smoke, drink, watch titties and eat steak at the same time.
I'm going to call it "my living room".

 

by DragonXero
9-11-08
I was going to tell this really off color joke about this woman I've been screwing.
But I decided it really was in poor taste.
You should never joke about the dead.

 

by DragonXero
9-11-08
What's the best part about sex with a twelve year old?
The last six words.

 

by DragonXero
9-11-08
So, my band, Scion of Avarice, has a bunch of songs written, but I'm having a hard time memorizing the lyrics.
It's probably because of all the screaming coming from the clost.

 

by DragonXero
9-15-08
Y'know, there are a lot of people who are still against legalizing pot because they think it's a dangerous drug.
I just have one thing to say to them...
Why so serious?

 

by DragonXero
9-15-08
I haven't cleaned my sheets in ages. I really should.
It's just that blood stains are so hard to get out.

 

by DragonXero
9-17-08
Deep down inside, I'm a humanitarian. I don't think I'd ever even hurt a fly. I mean-
Who the hell are you?
I'm your biggest fan!
So as I was saying, I might shove a 6 year old off a rooftop, but I'd never hurt a fly.
AAAAAAAAAAH!!!

 

by DragonXero
9-17-08
Ellen Degeneres confuses the fuck outta me. I mean, she's a tomboy, but when she does talk shows, she does all that girly crap that no man would watch.
See, what I'm really trying to say here is that I'd fuck any of her girlfriends.

 

by DragonXero
9-17-08
Up here, on the rooftop, I make the rules.
And rule #1 is that giving a reacharound is not an option. It's a requirement.
You called?

 

by DragonXero
9-17-08
Republicans are afraid of terrorists. Democrats are afraid of guns.
You know what I'm afraid of?
Republicans and Democrats.

 

by DragonXero
12-15-08
Arthas, Lich King of Azeroth! I have had a revalation! I no longer stand at your side! We, the Knights of the Ebon Blade, shall destroy you!
Very well Morgraine. You and your traitorous Death Knights would do well to never see me again. The next time we meet, you die.
Uh, we're not with him. Seriously, we're all about zombies and scourge and stuff.
Do you want us to kill him, oh King Arthas?
DO NOT FALL TO TEMPTATION! HE IS A DECEIVER!
Real loyal bunch you got there, Morgraine. Have fun with that. I'm off to my throne.

 

by DragonXero
2-24-09
If you don't kill me, I'm gonna have to kill you...
Dude, I love that song.
What song?
Wait what are yo-
Oh right. The Type-O song.
AAAAAAAAAAHHH!

 

by DragonXero
2-24-09
You know, there was this one time, I went to the grocery store at about 2 PM and there wasn't a single screaming kid or idiot taking up the whole aisle with his cart.
Just kidding. That never happened.

Showing page 27.

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