All comics by Ranger77

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by Ranger77
11-09-03
D&G wants to take this opportunity to welcome our regular Ranger's World crew back after a brief sabbatical.
Kiss my ass!
As you folks can see, B is a bit upset about being back. His stress also reversed the effects of the rift....
They've pissed off me, you, Helena, Chuck....wait a minute. Where is Chuck?
That's a good question. Before the walkout he said something about taking a break to travel.....
"....which means he could be anywhere."
Good morrow young person. Why are you clenching the good earth like that.
Tell the 'good earth' to stop spinning for a minute and I might be able to come up with an answer.

 

by Ranger77
11-09-03
Now that you've finished your...convulsions, good sir, can you tell me where you're from.
Not from here, from the looks of you. Last thing I remember was like, slugging down Jager in the backseat of a yellow LTD. What are you, Amish or something?
Not really. I'm actually an agnostic.
That doesn't make a whole lot of sense.
You see my friend, this is the Valley of Misfit Ideologues!
Uh...like, excuse me?

 

by Ranger77
11-09-03
Berlin 1968. In the Cat and Mouse game of Cold War espionage, codewords were the precursor of spam subject lines.
schemed.
hpnter oye.
humanness.
menopause.
blatz!
blatz!

 

by Ranger77
11-10-03
The story so far....Chuck got drunk and ended up somewhere strange. Pretty typical behavior actually....
Hal tells me you're new here stranger.
New and like a bit confused. Misfit Ideologues?
All of us here were rejected by our friends and family because we chose to be different. Hal for example didn't fit with the Amish because of his beliefs.
And you....?
I drive an SUV, love to watch Fox News and I'm getting ready to put some rounds downrange with my new pre-ban AR-15. I might grab a cheeseburger afterwards. You're welcome to come along....
Uh, no....if I'm hallucinating it's probably best not to introduce firearms into the mix just yet.

 

by Ranger77
11-11-03
BIG news from the world of Spam!!
Rock..hard in Under..5mins or Your..Money Back.
Lengthen your Male Anatomy safely and naturally!
Was it you that wanted to go on a Blìnd Dàte ...
Fwd: explanation of fantastic foreplay array ...

 

by Ranger77
11-11-03
The "journey" continues....
Actually we like it here in the commune. It gives us a chance to express who we really are.
Uh-huh...
"Take Wil for example. He thinks multiplayer games, chatrooms and forums are overrated and stupid. Sam on the other hand is 15 and not on Ritalin, Prozac or Vicodin!"
For 50 bucks you can be a lap dancer in Star Wars: Galaxies....yeah that's REAL fun. Geez.
Man, what a nice day!
"Our Amy eats red meat and likes beer, while Lester is a activist for women's causes."
Coors. COORS? Do yourself a favor and drink out of the toilet...you'll get a higher quality product and more flavor.
No means no, my brothers. Forget that, and I'll cut ya.

 

by Ranger77
11-13-03
Don't know what to say to the opposite sex? Take a hint from spam!
Breaking news: my ass hurts qzy9c....
WANT A BIG ONE dngkgndepes?
May Jay Abraham help you - 824.
(This strip was made possible by contributions from ivytheplant and people like you!)
My Jeans are too Tight!
Re: %RND_UC_CHAR[2-8], further on dramlit

 

by Ranger77
11-13-03
The truth about cats and dogs....
What's your favorite pick up line?
Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies.
Feel the Disney Magic.
(This strip was made possible by contributions from ivytheplant and people like you!)
May Jay Abraham help you - 824.
No two snowflakes are alike.

 

by Ranger77
11-13-03
Chuck, why don't you just stay here for awhile. Admit it, you haven't seen anything here that you disagree with. I can tell.
Dude, I don't, like, belong here. I'm not a misfit.
One of the guys saw you on Stripcreator. You definitely belong here.
Doesn't matter bro. I'm out.
You realize of course that you're about 3500 miles from your home....umm...what are you doing?
I'm leaving the way I came in. Got a rehab counselor 'misfit' bringing me a case of Jack Daniels....

 

by Ranger77
11-13-03
Chuck, the others asked me to come over and speak to you about this silly plan of yours to drink yourself back home.
Go ahead....I'm only on my second bottle.
Sometimes you really don't know what's good for you. Being here in the Valley is good. You belong with us.
So like are you an ultra conservative like your other hippie friend?
No, I'm here because I could give a rat's ass about JLo, Ben Affleck, Jessica Simpson, reality TV and anything on the Lifetime channel.
If I didn't think this was all a dream I'd be so attracted to you right now.

 

by Ranger77
11-14-03
Chuck...are you ok?
Dude....I'm so glad to see you. I had, like, this weird dream about a Valley of Misfits....
And you had to get really blasted to come home. Hate to tell you this my friend, but you got it backwards.
Uhhh....you don't mean....
Didn't work, did it?
Shit.

 

by Ranger77
11-14-03
Playing "pass it along" with SPAM!
Hey hows it been going? ee uddqg
ok.
Fwd: Jenna tames shrew mcgee instigating disc...
ok.
(Wardrobe provided by Botany 500)
Fwd: tormenter bunny codifier unrealistic par...
Huh?

 

by Ranger77
11-14-03
Still passing the spam (and we really didn't eat that much.....)
Fwd: Let's arrange a meating aptness unsynchr...
ok.
Fwd: married/affair dating service ennobling ...
ok.
(Jay Abraham reference courtesy of e-Scam records.)
Re: stressed about your bills there is a way ...
May Jay Abraham help you - 824.

 

by Ranger77
11-15-03
So are you ready to believe this is real?
I guess. But that doesn't answer how I got here.
Could have been a bunch of things. Maybe you were kidnapped, or maybe you fell into some dimensional rift....
No....that plot device has been like overused too much already.
I tend to believe it has something to do with that yellow '75 LTD body with the huge pontoons on it sitting in the harbor.
Actually now that I think about it.... Damn Foghat. Strange shit always happens when I listen to Foghat.

 

by Ranger77
11-15-03
A man, his bull, and Spam.
Human Growth Hormone.
*snort*
colon cleaner gy
*snort*
Junior stock.
I just had to tell you that was a great nïght . hi qggq

 

by Ranger77
11-16-03
WARNING: Computers with artificial intelligence can be possessed by spam if they are connected to the internet....
Is This Your Mom?
Come...play..with...the mom next door!!
Interesting Yo.
Hot and horny moms!
(No its not a Mac...it's a Mack Daddy!)
Straight outta the trailer.
You...will...be...shocked!!!!

 

by Ranger77
11-17-03
More from Eddie, the Spam possessed computer.
* I rubbed it so hard it went bright RED*
*PEnetrate unreal am*
LOL
*Claudia says its true*

 

by Ranger77
11-17-03
You gotta admit, nice job on the pontoons but to ruin a perfectly good Lincoln like that....
You will find the answers you seek are often in front of you, homes.
AAAGH...Great. Another, like, cast member.
I am called Mako. I believe I have information to help you on your quest, yo.
Quest...yeah right. And why are you here in "Misfitland." Let me guess....you don't know any martial arts.
I assure you I can kick your ass at any time. I'm here because Monks are usually celibate. I'm into the hoochies. Know what I'm sayin' dawg....

 

by Ranger77
11-17-03
In the near future, wars will be fought with thinking machines and their weapons of choice will be, yes, SPAM!
c0ck-karate lessons index headmaster aright mastermind flow!
Jenna tames shrew mcgee balms blanketing pincushion headlining availing!!
anal formalization selects youngly chemistry!!
midnight-rendezvous followers sense sens...
Baby got back .... Long leg action .... [RNXY]New: Your Penis can be Enlarged, kvuohv...

 

by Ranger77
11-18-03
Of course, the robotic wars described in the last strip are not possible now. In these less exciting times we have to settle for more conventional battles....
Fwd: Unlimited.t1me.0ffer ruptures admixture ...
Fwd: Educational fornication rouse gape criti...
Fwd: necessitate congest diagnoses transcribe...
Fwd: Jenna J inspires you eased dynastic iron...
Meet me tomorrow
This Is For All The Ladies Out There. ibuff a...

 

by Ranger77
11-19-03
Spam sometimes tends to be rather minimalist in its composition....
Yo.
Friday.
Your account.
Net R.X now!
....but that only lasts for so long.
Fwd: Good offer on Paris Hilton paperers poss...
Re: PARIS HILTON admirably naturally trustful...

 

by Ranger77
11-19-03
In his search for answers Chuck gets the 411 from a 4th degree Wu-Tang monk....
So you're telling me I brought myself to this place in my alcoholic stupor.
Everyone who finds this place comes on their own, know what I'm sayin'?
And if I want to leave....
You talk to the dark man who lives on the other side of the valley, yo.
*sigh* Don't you think this is like getting pretty drawn out.
Like Dragonball Z my brother, like Dragonball Z. You want a hit on this phat blunt I'm about to fire up? It's the Shizz-NAT, my nizzle!

 

by Ranger77
11-20-03
Ever wonder about what goes through the minds of geniuses? How do these "Beautiful Minds" get beautiful? Spam can give us a clue.....
Re: PARIS HILTON baffler penetrators babbles ...
Re: Hilton video organ ranging cranberries co...
Re: PARIS HILTON admirably naturally trustful...
Fwd: Good offer on Paris Hilton paperers poss...
Fwd: check out the Hilton vid everyones talki...
Medications are delivered right to your door....

 

by Ranger77
11-20-03
Chuck's Journal Entry #1: I'm still, like, here. Have to find this dark dude. Tried the monk's stash....it was whack.
I don't understand why you wanted me to come with you.
It was either you or the monk and if I heard his chanting of selected verses from 50-Cent one more time....
So what do you plan on doing when you find this "dark man."
I will listen to him and if he does not assist me, I will kill him.
WHAT?!
Just kidding. Sounded cool though didn't it? All, like, ominous and shit.

 

by Ranger77
11-21-03
Meanwhile....in the Middle East, diplomats try to figure some way to find a common ground with those living in Arab states ....
. . . .
. . . .
Hilton video contexts tossed indivisibility!
Re: PARIS HILTON narrowly thermodynamics cong...
[This comic was not endorsed by Paris Hilton.]
eightyeight grand (American $) dedicated for You
Wouldnt you like a Lärger Pënis ? sccjj xh

 

by Ranger77
11-22-03
Back at Ranger's World HQ....
I don't like it. I know Chuck's weird but this is troubling. No one has seen him and his bong is cold.
Give him a bit more time. He's probably just as pissed as we are about this Spam W0rld thing.
Yeah. I guess so. Did you want to meet our new Assistant Stage Manager?
Yeah...It's lucky we found someone to fill in until Chuck gets back. I hear this guy is good.
Minutes later....
Dude, I've just been propositioned by a chicken, offered free legal advice from an owl, screamed at about being a Mac user by a glowing circulatory system and hired by a burning bush!
And your point would be....?

 

by Ranger77
11-22-03
Amazon Women on the Moon! (New and Improved with Spam and a sex scene!)
Ÿou Ðont Have To Be Alone Tonight!..............
Im looking for my Mr. Right are you him ? ogg...
Wow your a real cutie would you wanna go out....
Sup I read your profile i thought you were. z...
I never woulda expected to meet online love. ...
This is what im looking for in a man. cfddhh ...

 

by Ranger77
11-24-03
Yo! Listen up. Get it on with a Milf !
All the channels you need!
When Spam hits the language barrier....
Home Grown Gals Go Raw. Over 100,000 BeautiÆ’ul SinGles To Choose From...

 

by Ranger77
11-24-03
....Did you hear? The House passed an Anti-Spam bill today....
....Yeah, it would override tougher state anti-spam laws and was created with the cooperation of the Direct Marketing Association and the ISP lobbies....
....BWAH-HAHAHAHA....
....Got any more Paris Hilton emails? I'm running low....

 

by Ranger77
11-24-03
Chuck's Log (heh heh...log): After a few days we like made it to this cave....
According to the monk, the dark guy is like in there. You can go back if you want.
No....I'd rather stay if you don't mind.
*sigh* You've fallen in love with me. Well you know I kinda figured....
Actually Chuck, I don't love you. I'm just fascinated by how you function. Sort of like watching my cat clean her butt with her tongue.
Fair enough, but couldn't you have chosen something better to....
No.

 

by Ranger77
11-29-03
Fwd: Paris is best viewed at night tickles na...Re: Paris H1lt0n-we love-her goatees banning ...Fwd: H1lt0n/ shes-hot,and-in,the/buff boxers ...
Dude, get a grip. You're stuck.
Re: Paris H1lt0n-we love-her disliking transp. ... Fwd: H1lt0n/ shes-hot,and-in,the/buff lunchin..Fwd: A taste of Paris second bobbin beehives ..Fwd: H1lt0n/ shes-hot,and-in,the/buff falsely... *POP*
(Dedicated to the loving memory of Mufinella Bartush and her obfuscated domain!)
There. Now don't you feel better?
MAKEMONEYnjscdxfrb....Moms with gargantuan Fun-Bags in heat ....

 

by Ranger77
11-29-03
I think this is it.....mist, ambient noises, darkness....add a disembodied voice and you've got yourself more cliches than Tuesday night on the SciFi Channel.
"You have entered the Lair of the Dark One!"
"Many have tried to make the journey here and many have failed. This is sacred ground and only the bold can proceed!"
Should I mention I just boldly took a whizz on his sacred ground.
Hush.

 

by Ranger77
12-01-03
This is stupid.
You might want to just calm down. We don't know what this guy is capable of.
"To enter the inner chamber you must complete three quests to prove your dedication to your cause."
Uh...yeah. Big voice dude. I'll tell you what: let us in and I leave this S&W Model 19 with hollowpoints in my holster.
You can't possibly think that the threat of brute force....
"Umm....You may enter, warrior...."
I stopped playing D&D when I was 21. I would like to keep it that way.
*sigh* I'm not even going to ask where you're hiding a handgun.

 

by Ranger77
12-06-03
Sometimes professional help is needed in the war on Spam!
Hello, my name is Eddie and I'm addicted to Spam!
Hello Eddie!!
I guess I hit rock bottom when I started doing all the Paris Hilton mailings. I just can't help it.
pårîs(FRÉÉ)Híltoñ¦ ....Dammit, there I go again.
One day at a time my friend. One day at a time.

 

by Ranger77
12-06-03
In a world where Spam runs rampant and the fabric of reality is OUT OF CONTROL....
Hey man. it's me.
I thought so.
One man must stand up to forces he doesn't understand to fight a cause he doesn't believe in.....
See the girl next door Getting Pounded!
I bring you alien naked!
....in order to find out his true nature and survive. "Spam Wars: Attack of the Subject Lines", coming soon to a desktop near you!!
Increase your size and length....
There?

 

by Ranger77
12-07-03
Before we go in you'd better drop this macho bullshit. You don't know how powerful he is. He might demand your respect.
I'll respect him if he can get me, like, back home.
You just don't get it do you.....
Listen just because some spooge has got a big voice doesn't mean he should get respect.
"Er just one thing, warrior.....enter alone. Leave the chick outside."
Chick?! CHICK?!!!
Y'know I'm not right very often, but when I am....

 

by Ranger77
12-08-03
So you're the dark man.
And you're Chuck, the outsider.
Nice place you have here.
It's okay. I'm in the middle of remodeling the basement. Can I offer you a soda or something? I only have diet....

 

by Ranger77
12-08-03
It is said, that the reason Spam is so prevalent is the clever and creative ways they get people to open the email by an enticing subject line....
Hi.
HI.
hI.
H.i.
hi.
build an e. bay auctionhouse ch.eap goods...

 

by Ranger77
12-09-03
So what you're saying is that I have a split personality and the other guy brought 'us' here.
Yes. Your other self contacted me several times for the directions on how to get to the Misfit valley.
Gotta tell you, man. That just sounds too weird.
Actually large amounts of alcohol and stress combined with really bad 70's rock will make people do strange things.
And this other personality.....
Calls himself Billy. Pretty cool but he likes Guns N Roses way too much.

 

by Ranger77
12-10-03
So all those years I had blackouts, some guy named Billy was running around with my body.
Actually it's his too. He wants to stay here. You want to go. Presents a small problem doesn't it?
And I suppose you have a solution.
Yep. A chamber that will separate you two from each other for a limited time so you can work this out.
Heh, I guess it would be cool to, like, meet my 'evil twin'.
Uhh....dude, Billy is pretty normal. You're the evil one.

 

by Ranger77
12-12-03
What the hell am I supposed to say to the guy: "I'm sorry you're trapped in me?" Hopefully he's reasonable.
I have never liked you.

 

by Ranger77
12-12-03
Look I'm sorry, but I'm the one calling the shots and I say we, like, go home.
When you were 17, you drank, from a cup, the chewing tobacco spit of five of your buddies on a dare for 20 bucks.
You're not going to make this easy are you?
Nope.

 

by Ranger77
12-21-03
Ok, I've never said I was some kind of angel. But you're the intruder here not me.
Whatever. Look, if you want to get rid of me, let's just get it over with. Just remember some people know ME as well as you.
Like who? Any of the Ranger's World dudes?
Heh heh, just Helena. We've snogged a few times.
You WHAT?!
And you thought all those times she was buying you drinks she was just being nice? God, you're naive....

 

by Ranger77
12-22-03
A very SPECIAL episode....
Merry Christmas to you .friend
Why thanks. Nice to see that you're capable of messages that aren't spam.
Merry Christmas to you .friend
No More Locker Room Shame ...!

 

by Ranger77
12-23-03
Forget Maxim. Forget FHM. Spam has all you need to know to score with the ladies!
Party plans?
Get my email?
L3sbian Lunch?!

 

by Ranger77
12-25-03
"Bick....got your email about a Christmas strip with all the Ranger's World characters appearing and wishing the five or so people who actually read the strip a happy holiday...."
"....unfortunately most of us had other committments...."
"....but don't worry we arranged for some substitutes. - B"
Longhorn is evil! EVIL, people!! E-E-EVIL!!!
Where the hell is my Schlitz?! I ordered it an hour ago!!

 

by Ranger77
12-26-03
I am from the future. I must know if your modern day society is ready for the information I bring.
How many nimphs can you fit into a room? All Queer As Folk Stars NAKED! Britney spreads her legs.... ... xsirhBxzkvoozmvilCxln
Er....yeah.
Get my email? Multiple ways to get home loans!

 

by Ranger77
12-26-03
Back at the Dark Man's lair....
Ok. It's like, done. This Billy guy said he won't take over my body anymore.
*sigh* Too bad. He's really not a bad guy.
Whatever. Now, how do I get home?
Go out the door behind me. When you get to the clearing wave your arms above your head.
Great, more magical shit.
Not at all. When the taxi comes tell the driver to take you to the airport.

 

by Ranger77
12-27-03
Chuck's Log: I'm finally heading home. Turns out Misfit Valley is just south of Oakland, California. Figures. I can't help thinking I forgot something else...
Well he's gone. I guess that's that.
I underestimated Chuck. I thought he would see this was all just an elaborate plan to get him to walk into the separation chamber.
So what are you going to do now, Billy?
Stay here in the valley, I guess. Although I might just pop in now and then on the idiot to really screw him up....

 

by Ranger77
12-28-03
Somewhere in Iraq....
Ok, Listen up for mail call. Harris, you got a letter. Johnson, you got a box of cookies.
Smith you got a penis enlarger, some herbal viagra, a Paris Hilton video and a free 'Gold' MILF pass for 30 days.
Smith, you sure you don't have internet access out here.
Internet? Why....what ever do you mean....?

Showing page 3.

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