All comics by Siegfried1027

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by Siegfried1027
2-12-04
Three PM
I really don't even know where the comic is going.
I have no idea who Marin is so I am missing all these references.
Eh, well, it's still funny. Make sure to be in the Pine Room so we can play Cube.
OK, and Jon and I may go to Hooters if you want to come along.
Honey, leave the fourth wall alone.
Sorry.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-13-04
Auerbach v. Poli Sci Random
Can someone give me the logic of this case?
"Nothing in the history or language of the Fourteenth Amendment persuades us that the closing of the Jackson pools constitutes a denial of the equal protection of the laws."
Well, that's nice, but can you offer any interpretation? Criticism? Anything?
Uh...um...duh..."Nothing in the history or language of the Fourteenth Amendment persuades us that the closing of the Jackson pools constitutes a denial of the equal protection of the laws."
Fuck I wish Brent were still here...
You are so totally smart, Dr. A!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-13-04
What Plato means is that geometry is concrete.
Actually, geometry is purely abstract, and that was Plato's whole point. See, Glaucon took your side and Socrates had to correct him.
No way, dude. Geometry is used all over for making stuff and stuff.
Let me use an example here...take, for instance, the fact that I have never seen a triangle.
LOL you never saw a triangle? LOL MORON!!!!!
I beseech thee, Lollis, to smite the idiot in your grace...

 

by Siegfried1027
2-16-04
All right, now take two parallel lines...
Wait, which version of the parallel postulate are we going to use?
The parallel axiom, you mean. And there's only one.
Haha, that's so quaint.
*grumble* You know I practically invented axiomatic geometry...
Yeah, way to waste your time there!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-17-04
Are these two men essentially different?
Why, of course they are! I can tell just by looking at the color of their skin that the gentleman on the right is oppressed...
...while the one on the left is a member of a privileged class. Yes, skin color and race indicate essential differences.
Yep, these two individuals are members of completely different groups. Why, it's almost as if one isn't on the level of the other, as if one isn't even the same species as the other.
And, of course, since one group is unable to fend for itself, we must take care of it. Yes, that's right, we're affirming Dred Scott. Taney was right after all! Imagine that!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-17-04
Yo Dave!
Hey, Tom, wussup?
Ah, not much. Still working on that circle-squaring. I think I almost got it!
Coo, coo. Hey, you don't really believe that two intersecting lines meet at a point, do you?
Dude, it's totally gotta be a line segment.
That's what I said!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-17-04
Bitch bitch bitch
...
Bitch bitch bitch bitch
...
BITCH
TAKE A FUCKING MIDOL ALREADY!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-18-04
I would like to discuss necessity and sufficiency, especially vis-a-vis these "Marriage is love" things I've been seeing.
In order for "Marriage is love" to imply "All those in love should be married (or be allowed to marry)" we must establish that love implies marriage.
In other words, the existence of love is sufficient to establish a right to marriage.
Though one may argue that love is a necessary condition for marriage (not true, but I accept it arguendo), no one has proved to me that love creates a right to marry the object of that love.
Do you love your mother? Your dog? And, if they love you, doesn't that meet a sufficient condition for the right to marry?
Please, understand logic and have precise definitions of words before you try to argue. I truly hate having to own you over and over again.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-18-04
Dude, stop trying to sound smart with all those big words.
...the fuck? Did you graduate high school? Your extremely limited vocabulary is not my fault.
Oh yeah, well you aren't funny at all! Ever!
Yeah, I've seen what you goons crank out every day, and I've seen what earns a high rating. I'll stick with actually being funny instead of participating in your circle-jerk.
Yeah, well, I could totally own you but I don't have the time.
Yes, you certainly aren't wasting shitloads of time on the forums or anything. Keep the envy to a minimum plz thnx.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
New transfers are "welcomed"
So, guys, here's the commuter lounge.
What a shithole!
Excuse me? What fails to meet your standards - the free computers just for you commuters, the free cable, the new chairs, plenty of DSA funding? What is it?
Well...I...buh...
Yeah, you totally screwed up somewhere, because you transferred TO Albright. TO Albright. So don't give me any shit.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
One year ago, shortly before Ziplor's evil nature is revealed
Haha, this comic is incredibly funny.
And here it comes...
Hey guys, come over and read this.
DUN DUN DUN!
What is it?
Bob and George.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
So the months passed...
Ahhhh, this comic is great.
Well, now that I'm caught up with the comic, maybe I should check out the forums...
Why did a shiver run down my spine when I said "forums?"
GET. OUT.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
And at the same time, in various locations in North America...
Vernunft, eh? Could be trouble...eh?
A great evil has entered our presence. Beware the triumvirate from hell.
Now, Shard, they can't be all THAT bad...

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
...
...
Do you have any idea...
Not a clue.
Oh, wait! I GET IT! Ahahaha! What a terrible joke...
Tell me!!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
*PUFF*
Single-player SSBM, huh?
*BOOM*
Yep.
...the computer just ran over that mine in a desperate attempt to acquire...food.
*CHING*
Video game AI - all A, no I.
I hear that.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-19-04
Playing Medal of Honor: Rising Sun
All right, Steve, cover me.
I got my own plan.
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? DON'T CHARGE THAT FUCKING MACHINE GUN!
Watch this...
You just pistol-whipped an entire Japanese platoon.
I so deserve the Navy Cross.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-21-04
Playing OoT
...
NO! Wrong way, idiot. Go back.
Since you seem to know exactly what to do in this game, Steve, why don't you play?
All right.
Sheiter, I'm lost!
In the Kokiri Forest?! How the fuck...

 

by Siegfried1027
2-21-04
AIMing with Danielle
OK, gotta go, I'll be on later. Love you :) kiss kiss
Ghey.
How does having a hot girlfriend make me gay?
...ghey.
stfu n00b

 

by Siegfried1027
2-21-04
YO! CAN I TAEK UR URDER!?
Guziak?
LOL YA I LIEK FUTBAL! YEHHHHHH!
Ahahahaha!
LOL WAT IS FUNNI!
Oh, nothing, just that this one moment defines justice better than Plato ever could.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-24-04
I think maybe the forum software you made might....
NO! MY SOFTWARE IS SOUND!
I'm just saying, it's been really buggy...
Yeah, well, can you do better?!
Well, actually, Coda, there is strictly superior forum software for free...made by professionals...
NOOOO MY LIFE MAKING SHITTY FORUMS FOR A TERRIBLE SITE IS OVER!

 

by Siegfried1027
2-24-04
Did you hear that Zimon left?
Yes, though I'm not sure why I should care.
WHAT? His reputation completely ruined our college! He lied on his resume!
I'm still not following why an official who really has nothing to do with academics matters.
The college is a joke because of him!
Yeah, it couldn't be that this college lets any idiot in and the professors are too busy indoctrinating to teach.

 

by Siegfried1027
2-27-04
FUCK YES! FUCK ME HARDER! OH YES! YES!
What the hell is going on in there?
Nick and Susan are being "just friends."
...you know, we just got new furniture...
I'll tell him to clean up afterwards.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-05-04
Soooo, hey there, Kelly.
What is it, Steve?
Nice nipples.
That's it.
COME BACK HERE, FUCKER!
Oh sheiter, this isn't how it works in hentai!

 

by Siegfried1027
3-05-04
Hey, the forums are finally back up.
Don't remind me.
I was going to make some comment about the post length to content ratio approaching infinity, but...
But what?
...but I thought you'd probably prefer if I shut up and opened this bottle of bourbon.
That's my boy.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-05-04
It seems that intelligence is met with bigotry in any age.
Wait, are you comparing yourself to me? Your comics almost revel in their being esoteric. You need to get in touch with the common man.
You think so? Is their stupidity my fault?
Not exactly your fault, but you can't be a smug, pretentious prick and expect people to give you the time of day.
You're one to talk. Notice the background?
I never liked that Aristophanes character.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-05-04
Yep, I just bought two hundred dollars' worth of hentai.
Impressive. You can feel free not to tell me things like that ever again.
Yep, gonna go home and jerk off. Jerk off a lot.
*shudder* OK, really, that's enough.
Biiiiiiiig ugly tentacles of doom...oh yes...
Nick, get over here and kick his ass.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-06-04
We're getting killed out here. Where's Zippy?
No fucking clue. AH I'VE BEEN HIT BY THE STUPID! I'M DOWN!
Hang in there! Log out! Log out!
I can't...they got me...
NOOO! DAMN YOU ZIPPY!
If my sprite could do it, I'd be doing that trademark Platoon stance right now.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-07-04
Four PM
How much longer...
We're almost at the cave.
Cave?
The secret, forgotten entrance to Ziplor's realm. A cave which no man has ever entered...
So this cave and you really have very little in common.
You never seemed to complain.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-08-04
Five PM (in the cave)
Go to the next room.
All right.
SHIT! Hey man, it's cool!
NO, IT ISN'T.
Errr...wrong next room.
Master using it and I will kick your ass.

 

by Siegfried1027
3-09-04
Undergrad courses - Philosophy of Physics
Stuff moves. It's a fact.
Dude, that's deep!
Philosophy of Mathematics
Numbers exist. It's a fact.
Dude, that's deep!
Philosophy of Technology
People make tools. It's a fact.
Dude, that's deep!

 

by Siegfried1027
4-09-04
You know, the Egyptian culture must be the most interesting of ancient cultures.
Yeah, gonna have to call bullshit on that.
Why do you say that?
The Greeks were superior in every way, considering they invented natural philosophy, and they made such advances in geometry and algebra that they effectively invented those fields as well.
I see, so you prefer the ancient culture that considered pederasty a noble and desirable activity.
...damn you.

 

by Siegfried1027
4-16-04
Random bio major
So I hear you need to take Calc I...that shouldn't be too hard.
wtf duder no way i gotta change majors I am so fuxed
Random physics major
Do you think relativity is actually fatal to transcendental idealism?
Torque makes us go.
Random math major
So what do you think about Gödel?
Gudle? Huh? That wasn't in any of my required textbooks, so he must not be relevant.

 

by Siegfried1027
4-29-04
So, like, I totally took this honors course.
Really, which one?
It was like, film and junk.
Wonderful! Didn't you love learning about the early history of the medium? Griffith was good times.
Learning? That totally wasn't on the syllabus!
Ah, my mistake.

 

by Siegfried1027
4-29-04
You psychology majors have no understanding of Hobbes.
Dude, you are so mistaken on Hobbes it's insane.
Hey, you guys discussing political theory or something?
No, Robert just holds the ridiculous belief that Hobbes only exists in Calvin's imagination.
I'll be back when you guys get lives, k?

 

by Siegfried1027
4-30-04
Remy Martin VSOP is nice, but avoid Courvoisier VS. Too harsh. Also nothing wrong with a good Chivas, right? What do you drink?
DUH
...yes?
UM...MILLAR LITE
Thanks to The Simpsons for this comic's punchline.
I see. Here is a ball. Perhaps you would like to bounce it.
YAY!

 

by Siegfried1027
5-07-04
Before Nam
America rules! Let's kill gooks!
Right after Nam
America sucks! We killed gooks!
Now
America rules! Vote for me!

 

by Siegfried1027
5-09-04
I do say, old girl, I must certainly take issue with your bloodthirsty portrayal of me in your comics.
Awww, how cute! But those can't be your words...is Robert putting you up to this?
ER...UMMMMM...
Yes, cutie?
GIMME THE FUCKEN TREETZ, WOMIN!
Yikes.

 

by Siegfried1027
5-10-04
Mmmmm! Soylent green is...
?
...is...
Yes?
DELICIOUS!
Shut up and pass the babyback ribs.

 

by Siegfried1027
5-10-04
Hmmm...can't be too hard...that dumb owner does it all the time...
There, that should do it. Just gotta listen for UPS for the next few days...
Why did I just bid on five thousand Milkbones?

 

by Siegfried1027
5-10-04
Wow Sharon is a vile beast.
Yeah, the picture does not look good.
Oh, it's worse in person.
Do I even want to know?
Let's just say her second derivative is positive.
Yowzers.

 

by Siegfried1027
5-11-04
She thinks it's funny that my dog got into my ebay account?
Hope the seller gets this e-mail before he ships...
Several days later
Why are those six UPS trucks stopping at my house...

 

by Siegfried1027
5-12-04
A public service announcement.
The only bigger threat to our society than gay marriage is the intermarriage of Canuckese and American citizens.
Please, for the good of your country, only shuck domestic corn. Thank you.

 

by Siegfried1027
5-16-04
...hey...no wonder they aren't here yet...he changed the fucking address! AROOOOO!
And yet, he still leaves his credit card out where I can find it. Hmmm, let's see what Expedia has for me...
The next day, bound for Miami...
How the hell was I supposed to know the cabin wasn't edible? I absolutely BEGGED you to start meal service early...

 

by Siegfried1027
5-23-04
There's something I have to say...
Yes?
You could definitely make helium from hydrogen.
Uh...
Wait for it...
Ooooooh, right! Thanks, baby!

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
Nice.
Hey, check out that hot chick over there.
I don't understand. Can you translate?
There exists a human such that she is female, she is attractive, and she is right over there.
Check out the quantifiers on that!

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
Follow the scent...I can smell 'em...
Ohhhh yeah...almost there...
Paydirt.
BEAGLEZ!

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
I've got her right here, and she's never leaving.
She won't fit through the door anymore, will she?
That COULD be a factor in her continued presence...

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
Belle, come on. Stop sniffing that grass.
*tilt*
Hey, come on. It's not much of a walk if you stop every five feet to sniff everything you come across.
You thought this was a walk? I'm just checking up on the local canine gossip. I don't do exercise.

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
Enjoying some scotch, eh?
Ah, liquor, the great leveler.
You mean you lose that arrogant demeanor when you're drunk?
Oh, no, no, not at all.
It's just that, when I'm drunk, this goon over here can almost beat me at SSB.
Fudge you, butthole.

 

by Siegfried1027
6-02-04
Hey, you're finally of legal drinking age!
Yeah, we should go hit a bar sometime.
Yeah...hm...
What is it?
Well, it's too bad that 90% of what you do is illegal at any age.
I'll tell you what I told the cops - it's medicinal.

Showing page 3.

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