All comics by bencomic

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
fuck you nadir!!! ha ha!
u
oh shit
you turned that around, and made me look like a fool!
i sure did
i'll die now!

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
Every knee will bow and every tounge confess that Jesus Christ is LORD. No matter what.
You and every human past present and future WILL bow to him. Even the demons, angels, and Satan himself will bow to the Lord Jesus
I almost feel like a sage now, even though I have so much to learn...
so jazzy
i've always wondered what it's like to be brainwashed.

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
oh man jazzy, you're my queen
what?!
i can't believe you're actually saying this for real.

i've read about people like you, in books
yeah, i didn't know they actually existed
you're my hero, jazzy.

let's fuck raw.
I HATE faggots. Just ask Dr_Dos.

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
I've always been into incest, it's just the kind of thing that you don't really talk about until you're very confident in your place as a regular
I have this big huge list of everything I'm into on my LiveJournal because sometimes people ask about that sort of thing, and it's easier to just say "Here, let me dig up the link" instead.
oh yeah, i think i read that once... yeah i remember reading how you've jerked off to your own feet. i like how that stuck with me rather than the incest
Um..yes well, .. ok I don't have an answer for that
you can't justify something like that
Not especially, no

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
fine, fine, enjoy your semen shirts
THERE IS NO SEMEN ON THESE SHIRTS, STOP MESSING WITH MY DAMN MIND
this is nothing compared to what will happen if you keep wearing them
soon you hear voices... little tiny voices... millions of them saying "hello, we are lost... can you help us find the way to the egg?"
... will you sleep in these clothes? like, will you be sleeping with sperm swimming on you?
i am not listening to you

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
gorth
hey gorth
DO DRUGS
i concur
do every drug there is!
what!? no!

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
(these people almost never recognize a good ol random pwning :/)
<Jazzy> go wank to your dolphin incest or something
that is some funny shit, you gotta admit

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
* WHAT_THE_FUCKING_FUCK has joined #rawr
YOU ALL FUCKING IDIOTS FOR CALLING US DOOMFAGS SINCE YOU'RE MAKING FUN OF A GAME THAT HAS BEEN AROUND SINCE BEFORE YOUR MOM AND TECHNICALLY THAT MEANS YOU ALL SUCK BECAUSE YOU'RE
DISRESPECTING SOMETHING THAT CREATED THE FPS GENRE AND YOU ALL CALL YOURSELVES THE BEST EVER WHILE YOU'RE IDIOTS FOR IGNORING US NOW SHUT THE HELL UP AND LISTEN TO ME FOR JUST ONE SECOND
DOOM IS A BETTER GAME THEN ANYTHING YOU EVER WILL BE ABLE TO CREATE, YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?
IF YOU EVER CALL US ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN i WILL COME TO ALL YOUR HOUSES AND FEED NUKES DOWN YOUR THROATS.
* Nadir sets mode: +b *!*@cloak-A558765.dyn.optonline.net

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
gorth i gave my eight-year-old neighbor a cd-r full of PORNOGRAPHY
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT
everyone's gotta learn! at some point!
NO! ARGH! NUERO! I AM VERY ANGRY RIGHT NOW
did they ask for the pornography nuero?
no they didn't! i'm just helping learn

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
well, i think it matters whether the child wanted it at least a LITTLE
JUST BECAUSE YOU SCREW UP DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO TAKE A CHILD WITH YOU
also, what kind of pornography was it
flimsy, it's a grab bag! of everything!
even scat! and bestiality

 

I AM IN PUBERTY! I HAVE PIT HAIRS, DEEPER VOICE, AND HAIRS WHERE IT'S NOT APPROPPRIATE TO SAY
by bencomic, 10-11-05

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
eurakarte back then:
"my flash cart did not come yet"
"so im going to watch the wall and eat bacon"
eurakarte now:
"so i got a flop on the high straight with an ace and pocket queens with a double jack on outside river bet raise call pot odds ffhrlhrjgjarghrjkhbkjbhjakrhjkhrjkhgae"
"url of dickgirl"
nondescript that did not even make sense
you could not possibly flop a straight with pocket queens

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
i could do whatever it is you're trying to do ten times better and you don't see #mzx chicks offering me blowjobs for php scripts
that's because you call them freaks
well ibuki damn well is a freak
fura, i'm sure i'll sleep with a woman well before you.
but dos, you're gay
....wait fuck you that was uncalled for

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
I had the craziest dream last night: I could take over other people's bodies and could go back in time. It was so awesome.
only slightly back in time though; no more than the beginning of the day.
it was in a little school; a high school with hot girls :)
one of them had some sort of psychic powers. she was a fucking dickgirl though, so I ditched her
she was hot until I took over her body for some reason and found out she had a dick
damn you Eurakarte!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
she was dressed as a star wars character
that was the only disturbing part though, the rest was fucking awesome
oh, and thanks to reading a maddox's feminazi article before bed, for some reason dickgirl had little sharp curly daggers that came out of her tits when she was horny
other than those parts, the dream was awesome
;_; I never want to think about those parts of the dream ever again
the other parts were enough to make you people cum, I'll warrent

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
* [cbc]alphadragon has joined #stoners
yo wana chat?? plz
no
* Fungahhh is now known as Fungahhh[Out]
why
because i'm [out]
rofl ur so funny ha ha ha
i frgt to lgh

 

by bencomic
10-11-05
* Aplsos has joined #stoners
i'm the fag police, i arrest fags. come with me, [cbc]alphadragon, you're under arrest
why u dont arrest ur self!!!! rolf
you have the right to remain silent
here are the handcuffs
* Aplsos sets mode: +b *!*_H_alpha*@*.co.za
now i am leading you into the paddywagon
* [cbc]alphadragon was kicked by Aplsos (woop woop woop sirens)

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
JAZZY: The following really happened at about 7:00 MST. Ask anyone mentioned if you doubt me. I'm the one called Eli.
i am swallowing the first pill. only about 3 or 4 more until there is no turning back
GOD LOVES YOU
eli YOUR GOD GAVE ME PSORIASIS
GIVE ME A FUCKING REASON TO LIVE OR I'M TAKING THE SECOND PILL!!!!
I can't speak 4 God
that's it, i've taken the second pill

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
im starting to feel... dizzy
only a few more... and everything... all the pain... it will all fade away
goodbye good buddy :(( you will always be in my heart
goodbye mordac... thank you for showing me what to do. ill see you in the next life
DON'T FU$$ WITH ME! I'm fing serious
goodbye

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
im feeling really dizzy... i just want to fall asleep right here
NO!!!!! DON'T DUDED
but i have to take another pill just to make sure
taking the third pill in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...
NO!
thridl pil

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
ohm ylfgod,,, im so dizzyh
JESUS LOVES YOU!
eli no, we've seen how much jesus hates him
U FAG STFU
eli its itoo a,llte..... imim fading aqwiay
imm taking lthe 4ht pill eli!!1

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
I'M PI$$ED
i took ikt
NO! NO| NO No
Eli only god can save him now
im dy igng.... theres no tuirnking back...... gokodbyye
me is crying in real life

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
is this a stupid prank?
nnoo itsn not a bprinak........ mmgogoobdye e;lli
we'd be some pretty horrible people to play such a prank :(
eli why the fuck would we be joking about something like that?
iiif i siee god ]ill tekkll him hi foor u :(((999;;;

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
I'm calling 911, hang on
DO IT ry0! NOW!
ryo just let him go, he can finally be at peace
HELL IS NOT PEACE YOU AS
eli after all the suffering he's been through there's no way he's going to hell
YES THERE |S!!!! WITHOUT CHRIST, ALL ARE DOOMEd

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
Anyway I called his county police station. They laughed at me and said 'sure kid'
GOPHER IS THIS A SICK PRANK
eli this isn't a fucking prank you goddamn cock
I'm calling him and he's not picking up his phone

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
oh my god he's alive
<gofer-chan> shh skullie, i am just kidding
you fucking liar
that's sick.
this is no time for jokes.
<gofer-chan> tell ry0 to stuff it

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
okay now you're just making shit up you goddamn fucking asshole
Skullie, if you're lying I will track you down and FU#% YOU UP!
gofer would not tell ryo to stuff it eli. we don't like profanity like that in here, even censored
...You cuss =(
don't call eurakarte a cuss, you dick

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
why did god have to punish him like that? what the hell did he ever do to god?
if gofer did do it at least we know he's in a better place, or reincarnated as a cute little baby. we can't really know for sure but it's one of the two
He sinned, We all do
eli he didn't fucking sin in the womb
all your works are as dirty rags b4 the throne of God
oh my gosh... am i alive??? IM ALIVE

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
?!?!?!!
IM STILL ALIVE
?!?!?!?!?!!??!
everyone... i... i died
i think i died!!! everything went black, it was fading outtt
K.O.

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
please everyone, just listen to my story
i woke back up and everything was so hot
it was just burning hot, all around, and i heard people screaming
and i just felt alone... more alone than ive ever been in my life
not alone as in i was just in a house alone or something, but as in... i was alone from god
i was in hell

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
but then... something opened up above me and light poured through... and a hand reached down and i grabbed onto it
and someone... someone pulled me out of that dark and firey hole
i coudlnt see his face, but it was just pure light
and he told me that it wasnt my time and that he loved me and had a plan for me, and that i was getting another chance
and oh boy, am i going to make the most of it!
* Eli sobs

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
I was so wrong :(((
i couldnt believe it myself
but i was so wrong... i was living a lie
I'm just glad jesus was there to help you
i cant believe i thought i would be reincarnated! i was in HELL
Just admit you're a sinner and that u need Him, that u believe the Bible, and that you wnt to serve Him and be His child

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
i am a sinner
Tell Him.
That's it
but... can he love me after all the bad things ive done? eli, ive done a lot of bad things
i touched a girls breast once through her bra. ive HATED PEOPLE. can god really love me after all that?
yes. Just pray the prayer

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
*** Dr_Dos has changed the topic on channel #rawr
well I think this is proof positive that god really does love you, and all of us
The lord works in mysterious ways
to '#rawr learned a lesson today, always realise that
this is my life moment
Eli i'm bringing this log to my church
god loves you, and he doesn't want to see you hurt '
eli i know of a church near here, should i start attending?
yes

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
my parents arent christian
my mom isnt home much and my dad is usually drunk
but you know what? im going to pray for them
because if god can change me, he can change ANYONE!
U serious? God loves ALL OF YOU
PRAISE LORD JESUS

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
Now, in case you missed it, to know Christ as your personaly savour, you must admit to Him that you're a sinner and need His grace; you need to realize that all have sinned and you can't work your way
to Heaven. Romans 12:2 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Isaiah ??:?? (I don't remember) For your works are as filthy rags before the throne of God (in terms of salvation). Know
that He is not willing that ANY should perish, but that ALL should come to repentance. Are you ready to pray the prayer? Here it is: Dear God, I admit that I'm a sinner, and that I can't earn my way
to Heaven. I know I've sinned against you. I accept and believe that Jesus Christ of Nazareth is the Son of God, and I believe in Him, that He lived, died, and was ressurected. I accept your gift of
forgiveness, and I now choose to serve you. Thank you for forgiving me and loving me enough to send Jesus. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen.That's it. Now you are guarenteed a place in Heaven. If you
spoke truely and meant what you said, you're a changed person, a born again person. God Bless you all. -Jazzy, who shall soon be called Eli. For more information, go to http://www.rapt ureready.com

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX: regarding Cave Story (Doukutsu Monogatari)
The game is only a few months old anyway, and I've been very busy those months. We're not ZZTers who sit around all day smoking crack and playing the latest retro games.
.. doing crack.. not smoking.. can you SMOKE crack :\
Whatever, I'm really tired. I shouldn't have to wake up early on Spring break. But I do.
Exophase, you can smoke it!
I shouldn't have to wake up early on spring break. Because I need to stay up late so I can insult ZZTers to all my idiot online friends for no reason.
Can you? Well I dunno what ZZTers tend to do with it. They probably take it up the ass or something.
Like everything else.

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
ajs; I hate trying to argue with my friends when I tell them that they should use platform-independant code (e.g. one friend uses direct-x a lot), and they're like "what should I care?"
Closed-minded bigoted idiots
Fools.

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
Look, I've told people about this before. This will be a repeat of a few months ago. No potentially offensive image linking on this channel. No sordid ZZT community eqsue discussions.

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
http://zzt.the-underdogs.org/ nadir/doodles.jpg i scanned some doodles earlier for some reason
Go really deformed furries
where are the furries? there are no furries
Ah, so there's not cat thing over there in those doodles, it's just a figment of my imagination
that's not a furry. you're a furry.
Ahahah, you're funny

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
Making a conlang is hard... there's so many cool sounds you can have :/
And of course you can't just have all the cool sounds in a same conlang... nobody could pronounce it if it had that many sounds :)
this is why i hate madbrain, right there
fungahhh yes. for one thing, he's talking about an auxlang, not a conlang
...yeah. i mean, who does he think he is
wait, what??

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
does the mzx community talk about us sometimes, like we're fucking cavemen or something
dave yeah
it goes a little something like this:
Go back to #rawr where you belong.
Heh. xD
Yeah, heh.

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
i named my banjo "My Woman"
should i name my djembe "MY MISTRESS"?
"my man"
gorth name it your redheaded stepchild. you play with your woman, you beat on your redheaded stepchild; sounds like the life of gorth to me
what about my harmonica?
your secret lover. you know, the one you blow all the time

 

by bencomic
10-12-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
would anyone mind reading through my fanfic, looking for mistakes/making comments?
Haha fanfic. Is it erotic?
haha no
then i won't read it
you suck :D
it's super smash brothers fanfiction oddly. I am strangely attracted to that category

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
You're just not making any fucking sense whatsoever.
yes i am
<nondescript> I'm a big homosexual cock lover.
no, i never said that or anything like it
OH NOES! NONDESCRIPT LOVES THE COCK!! I HAD BETTER COVER MY ANUS
hahah you're retarded

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
MEANWHILE IN #MZX:
Cows say "moo", yes they do, I'm not the type to lie to you.
Fish say "Whee!", I lied, you see, you really shouldn't trust in me.
i hate you and so does everybody else
it's true.

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
Guy and I are debating about gay marriage and why it is right or wrong. I'd like Guy to state his reasons why he thinks it is wrong.
okay, WHo goes first?
...you
oh. I dont know. Mainly because I dont like it. so there.
* _GuyX_ has left #MZXdebate (Leaving)

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
I USUALLY STAY IN HUBS SO I CAN CONVERSE WITH MY 31337 ANIME FRIENDS
You have THAT MANY friends? (Rim shot.)
AND WE CAN TALK IN FAUX JAPANESE AND SAY "KAWAAAAAAAAAI ^_^" A LOT
CHII?
HIDEKI HENTAI! PANTSU PANTSU!
wildkarrde: SHUT UP BEFORE I "POWER UP" AND GO "SSJ"

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
HEY I'M REBELLIOUS!! GOD DOESN'T EXIST AND HATES EVERYONE EVER
crank but the bible says god exists
mala F******K THE BIBLE!!
:oooooo crank what
I'M BLASPHEMOUS AND I TELL IT LIKE IT IS! I'M NOT P.C. AT ALL
how dare you

 

by bencomic
10-13-05
HOW DARE I SAY F**K AND SH*T!! MORE LIKE
you are challenging my belief system and that offends me
YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM DOES NOT EXIST
I will react in shock and outrage
I MAKE YOU CRY

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