All comics by finn34

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by finn34
11-09-05
Nobody knows the dongs I've seen... nobody knows my sorrow...
Oh, but you're wrong. I know almost all of them.
Though there was that Greece trip that I missed out on.... You probably saw some dongs then, too.

 

by finn34
11-09-05
What's happening?
Not much.
You wanna make out?
Eh. Why not?

 

by finn34
11-09-05
The cock police are coming! WOOWOO! Hear that? That's the cock siren!
WTF^-^?
People don't believe me when I say the Cock Police exist. But they do! I have pictures!
Seriously. WTF? 8-(
Oh no. I've said too much!
[user : finn34 has been kicked from #ChurchChat]

 

by finn34
11-11-05
I know what it's like, to be the bad man...
I put Baby in the corner.
I walk in L.A.

 

by finn34
11-11-05
I'm listening
I know the trouble you've seen, I know your sorrow
I love you, it's true.

 

by finn34
11-11-05
I do it better. I do it half as good as you
I'm gonna tell you what to do.
I can stop you now.

 

by finn34
11-11-05
I'm gonna break your stride. I'm gonna hold you down.
Everybody talks, I care.
I asked you.

 

by finn34
11-12-05
Take me higher, magical chicken!

 

by finn34
11-12-05
Cocks cocks and more cocks.
What?

 

by finn34
11-21-05
Yo.
Hi, I'm Larry. Two universes over, next to the copier. Sup?
Chillin'
Have you seen the kickass Earth I built?
No, I haven't. What's so cool about it?
Two words : Chainsaw Hands! It's like a non-stop deathmatch in there. I've got $10 that says the dinosaurs still win.

 

Oh, God, Jerry. I think mine's kicking in.
Ho ho -- HOARKGH!!!!!!!!!!
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

I think I just caught TACO FEVER!!!!
Oh my God, me too!
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

The kid said he wanted an XBOX 360 and it looks like you gave him a bundle of used sweat socks.
Listen, if he wants high-priced consumer electronics that could end up getting me shot, he can fucking forget it. Bundle of socks for everybody. We're done.
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

Christmas just wasn't the same after the filming of "Scat-na Claus 2 : Fecal Forest of Despair"
*ughn* C'mon Santa, *ughn* the kids are waiting! *hurf*
SOMEBODY CALL MY FUCKING AGENT!
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

by finn34
12-11-05
Did I ever tell you about that time I went to jail?
No...

 

by finn34
12-11-05
GUESS WHAT, Mom? I just ASSASSINATED TED KENNEDY!
OH MY GOD, NO!!! NOOOOO!!!
Wait... TED Kennedy?
Honestly honey, couldn't you kill someone IMPORTANT?

 

"There are known knowns, known unknowns, unknown knowns and unknown unknowns."
Jesus fucking Christ. Did Rumsfeld get his MA in DoubleSpeak? Do you have to dig up Orwell's corpse for extra credit?
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

"We don't do body counts."
Really? Cause I'm sure the corpses' families do.
by finn34, 12-11-05

 

by finn34
12-27-05
You're saying that your family wants you to have a baby, so they can eat it?!
mmmmm..... delicious.
... more like baby-licious!

 

by finn34
1-30-06
So there I am, jerking my cock to "The Best of Eric Clapton"...When my mom calls me up and I ask her to talk me off.
She does and as I'm lying there, completely spent, I get this itching to pardon Tom DeLay.
That's some sick shit.
I know! I'm a registered Democrat!

 

by finn34
1-30-06
I can't see so well since last week.
What happened?
I got Windex shot into my eyes.
How the hell--? I mean... damn.
The guy said he'd give me $50.
Buy me a drink?

 

by finn34
1-30-06
So some anonymous girl forwarded you pictures of her knockers?
Yep...
On your birthday?
Yeah...
Happy Birthday!
... TO MY PENIS!

 

by finn34
2-01-06
Did you hear?
What?
Scientists just announced that the world is going to end in 30 days!
Well, you know what that means...
Roadtrip / Killing Spree?
I was thinking that, yeah.

 

by finn34
2-01-06
So...
Yeah.
World's gonna end in 30 days.
Sure is.
And we're going to spend all 30 of them in this bar, aren't we?
Where else would we be?

 

by finn34
2-01-06
Listen, I'm sorry about last night.
Don't worry about it.
I just thought, "World's gonna end, why not?"
It's alright, I understand.
I mean, I pounded your ass HARD.
So did I.

 

by finn34
2-01-06
I LOOOVE JESUS!
SERIOUSLY! GETTIN' FILLED WITH THE SPIRIT!
OK, that's about enough of that.
Alright! Time to hit the bar!
Were still not getting in to heaven, though.

 

by finn34
2-01-06
OH YES! YES YES YES!! WORK IT!!
Oh. What am I doing?
Hell if I know.
I think this end of the world thing is getting to me.
Are you done with that chicken? We paid for the whole hour.

 

by finn34
2-01-06
I wish the Apocalypse would just hurry up already.
Why? There's still things we haven't done.
Like what, climb Mt. Everest? We've gone to church, had sex with each other, had sex with a chicken and spent every night drunk as hell.
I know.
This has been the best week ever.
Amen.

 

by finn34
2-05-06
Hey Jesus.
Hey! Look behind you! There's a Muslim with a nuke!
HOLY SHIT!!
GOTCHA!
You are an asshole when you're drunk.
So true.

 

You might be a GAMER if.... you've ever caught yourself using l337sp34k in real life conversations
I was like pwning this n00b and he's like STFU and i'm totally ROFLing
I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR LANGUAGE!!
by finn34, 2-06-06

 

You might be a Trekkie if.... You spend more time "in character" then you do sleeping.
Spock, set phasers for McGriddles!
I'll send an away team to SuperSize it, captain.
by finn34, 2-08-06

 

You might be a pornstar if ... You regularly discuss your anal bleachings with co-workers.
Seriously, one hour soaking and I feel like a new woman.
Do you have the number of your spa?
by finn34, 2-08-06

 

by finn34
2-15-06
So... I'm gettin' married.
Yeah.
You excited, or...?
Sure...
... Excited about screwing your wife.

 

by finn34
2-21-06
Any time you see a girl swallowing cocks, I'll be there.
Any time you see the cops coming down on Jesse Jackson, I'll be there.
Any time you see a bar where there's more than one beer sign in the window, I'll be there...
Getting CRUNKDAFIED!

 

by finn34
2-21-06
Since everyone's doing it, we are contractually obligated to have one "Brokeback Mountain" joke.
Homo, homo on the range...
... where the queers and bisexuals play...

 

by finn34
2-21-06
So...
Yup...
Getting married... on St. Patrick's Day.
You're a goddamned genius.

 

by finn34
2-25-06
Welcome to the desert of the real
Woah!
That is the sound of fate, Mr. Anderson... The sound of your death...
Woah.
You can't be dead. Because I love you.
Woah.

 

by finn34
2-25-06
Oh man. This guy is so fat, he ate himself to death.
Nope. He was murdered!
We had to break the law to get the evidence.
That's the city for ya.
I killed your wife!
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

 

by finn34
2-25-06
I miss Dad. It's my birthday... Meh.
Hey! I'm your wacky, possibly drugged-up brother. Happy birthday!
Yeah. Happy Birthday. Woo.
I've been shot at, chased by maniacs and thrown myself off a highrise!
Happy birthday!

 

by finn34
2-25-06
Wow! An island with dinosaurs!
Things are going to fuck up, I just know it.
Oh no! An island full of dinosaurs... and they're all after us!
Things fucked up, I knew it.
Call in the military...
... See you in the sequel.

 

by finn34
3-26-06
I'm writing a poem for my mom, what's a good word that ryhmes with "genius"?
Penis!

 

I just can't wait to get home and play Elder Scrolls IV : Oblivion. It's this RPG game, but you probably wouldn't like it, it's all about free-roaming and doing the whole "sandbox" gameplay which is..
GHUGHGUHGUHGUG
by finn34, 3-26-06

 

Man. I can't wait to NOT play Elder Scrolls IV : Oblivion.
I can't wait to drink until you turn into a hot girl. And I turn into an invincible flying machine.
by finn34, 3-26-06

 

OMG! You hate my favorite RPG! DIE!
Oh fuck! A TALKING CHICKEN!!!
by finn34, 3-28-06

 

... and Jesus spake thusly :
GET CRUNKDAFIED!!!!!!!!
by finn34, 3-28-06

 

Jesus came upon the women in the town and spake unto them :
LADIES !!! PUT UR HANDS IN TEH AIR!!!! AND WAVE 'EM LIKE YA JUS DON'T CAAARE!!!
by finn34, 3-28-06

 

by finn34
4-04-06
(is this thing on?) Test test 123
Can he get a little more voice in the monitor?
We ready? Jerry? They rolling?
*ahem* Cocks galore!
I'm sorry, line?

 

by finn34
4-04-06
Ok. We're good to go?
Yeah. Props guy just handed me my stuff.
*ahem* Hey bro, what's up with the candy hording?
Keep away. You always come after my candy!
This week, you're getting voted off the island.
You wouldn't dare! Because... I'm your long lost brother!

 

by finn34
4-04-06
This week's challenge balloon : transport a condom full of heroin across the Mexican border, after performing an enema on yourself!
Say what?
Just think about Sophmore year.
Oh yeah. Piece of cake.

 

by finn34
4-15-06
I just bought a car.
Really? What's the brand?
DaeWOOOOOO!!!
That never gets old.

Showing page 4.

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