All comics by Beeko180

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by Beeko180
5-23-09
I'm thinking about changing my name.
Why so?
Well all this He's Bob, I'm Bill stuff is kind of confusing. In fact it's so confusing that I use the toothbrush labelled "Bob".
You used my toothbrush?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Are you sure this is what you want to do?
Yes I am.
Ok, so be it. What nickname would you like to give your adopted son?
Wait what?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Oh, this great, this is absolutely FANTASTIC!
That's a form of sarcasm isn't it?
What do you think?
Give me five bucks and I'll buy one.
I'm going to use my new power to pop up in a random comic.

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So I says to the mangaer, "No I do NOT want turkey!"
Really?
That sounds pretty lame if you ask me. I would have jumped at the oportunity to do something cruel to my manager and kick him right dab in the-
FETUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
I don't know what to do clappy. You always seem to find these things easy to deal with.
You wanna know my secret?
Please, do tell.
I cry myself to sleep.
Yes. And you can do drugs JUST like me!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Ok now that I'm your lawyer, we need to settle an agreement on you're new name.
Great, wonderful... GRAND!
Ok, what would you like your name to be from now on?
Frank.
There, it's all settled, now I can go have lunch...

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Hello dead person.
I'M NOT DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Actually I think you are. When you look at it in my perspective, it isn't every day that you see a human living under the sea. And that fact stands taller than the fact that you aren't dead.
SO I SUPPOSE YOU AREN'T GAY?!?!?!?
I'm not gay I'm just attracted to male fish.

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Why help me young man, a Shark is attacking me!!!
Don't worry lady, I will leave you to your eminent doom!
Sticklepots...

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Are you sure that fish don't have the same breathing system as humans?
Yes I am.
I still don't believe you. I need proof.
In 1976 a german scientist performed the first disection of a fish. He took notes of what he saw and recorded all the data. He then compared it to a humans anatomy. They were completely different.
All that was a lie wasn't it?
I was hoping you wouldn't guess.

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
I haven't seen you around these parts before. You must be new.
Glad to meet you, I'm Roger.
What brings you here?
I work at the seafood store and my boss sent me down here to fetch a few REDFISH.
Lucky he was standing near the enterence to the 5th Dimenson.

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So what are you here for?
Mr. REDFISH sir, I have come to discuss the charges laid against you.
I know that deep down, you wouldn't want this to happen to you, but I know that we will not make it through this if we dont work as a team.
I do hope that we can reach an agreement.
Are we still having a sleep over at your house on Saturday?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
I'm telling you dude, that flaming bag smelled grooovy!
It was a bag of flaming poop!
Oh...
I guess smoking wasn't a very bright idea either huh?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So they call you plankton?
Yeah.
I'm a small, rodent-like, microscopic germ that floats through the sea.
I hope that we, being neighbours and all, can become great friends.
Not bloody likely. See you in hell.

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So do you like my new name?
Fraaaaaaank.
Don't say that.
You know, I could really get used to that.
Really?
Yeah, I mean writing "Frank did this" on the bonet of someone's car with bubble gum is way easier than writing "Bill did this".

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So what's it like to finally be back on the set?
Well, I actually thought we wouldn't have any more ideas. But boy do we have tonnes of new ideas up our sleeves.
So, you find it satisfying?
I sure do! I got my name changed and everything.
You're still gay and nothing can change that.
Now you're just trying to put me down aren't you?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
You know what, I think we accomplished a lot in one whole season. Heck, I got my name changed and even stopped wetting the bed!
You didn't read the first panel did you?

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Are you SURE that's why you boarded up the door?
No it isn't. I must come clean with you. Your son is dieing in there.
WHAT?!?!?!?!
JOKES! IT WAS KATHY'S SON!!!!
Kathy doesn't have a son.
This doesn't look too good...

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
You'll never get away with this Tooms!
Yes I will. Tieing you up together is a brilliant idea, that way I can burn BOTH of you at the SAME time! And then I'll bitch slap your mangled corpses all the way to china! MUA HAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TURTLE GUTS!!!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
So Beeko, do you think having the scene be a blue screen will help the viewer imagine what it's like to be filming all your garbage?
Actually it isn't garbage.
To some it may be garbage and to others it may not. But because an opinion is based on the judgemental thoughts...
You cannot simply use the opinion as a fact. It can't be a fact because some people out there may like my comics and some may not. Therefore making my comics not garbage.
CUT!
OK, THAT'S ENOUGH!!!!! I'M UP TO HERE WITH THESE STUPID SCRIPTS!!!!!!! OF COURSE THIS STUFF IS TRUE BUT IT'S A WASTE OF MY TIME!!!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Hey, did you hear?
Hear what?
Mark gained weight. Then he put it off, and then he put it on, and then he put it off and then he.....
Where is all this going to lead by the end of panel three?
I see. Very interesting...

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
I can't believe this! I just got demoted!
Really? Who's taking your place?
Would you believe it was the new guy?
Meanwhile...
You shalt not pass until ye has found me a cup full of squirrel spit.
But I NEED to use the bathroom!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Daddy, can you tell me a bed time story?
Well ok. But just one.
Yaaaaay.
Once upon a time, Daddy was a serial killer.
Sweet nightmares!

 

by Beeko180
5-23-09
Friendly Bear, would you ever eat me if we were stray animals?
No silly, that's what hunters are for.
I'm sorry but I have to eat you.
What? Why? I thought we were friends! Why do you have to eat me?!?!
Well in the wild, bigger animals eat smaller animals. And the bigger they are the more they eat. And the more they eat the less food there will be for the future. And right now we're lacking squirrels
Brace yourself for a world of pain my old squirrel companion.

 

by Beeko180
5-24-09
Wow. The search for the Holy Grail really WAS death defying!

 

by Beeko180
5-24-09
SOCK PUPPET SAYS THAT WAS ONE ROUDY CAT FIGHT YOU JUST HAD!
MEOW!!!!
Actually it WAS a cat fight, what you saw back there was me beating that guy senseless with a plank of wood.
Then what was all the high pitched moaning?
That was the cameraman.

 

by Beeko180
5-24-09
Are you sure you don't want this cat? It's loaded with drugs!
Look dude.
If I were going to reach my hand down the oesophagus of a cat for drugs, I would be pretty dumb.
But seeming I'm not dumb, I don't think it's worth your time to go around asking people for a cat with drugs lodged somewhere in the paths of its digestive system.
I stole it from the Prime Minister who's holding a reward of 5000 dollars for its safe return.
I'LL TAKE IT!!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-24-09
So you're just going to stand there until I do something?
Yes.
Over the period of an entire decade I have come to a particular era in time.
In this era everyone fends for themselves and anyone does what they please. My something is to defy the laws of physics and make you float in mid-air.
You know that's literally impossible right?
That's what they said to Homer Simpson when he ate the insanity peppers.

 

by Beeko180
5-25-09
Hey did you hear the one about the old lady?
What old lady?
God didn't like her so he made an elephant sit on her.
HAHA!
It's not funny, she suffered severe head trauma and her brain began to malfunction shortly after causing her to turn purple and die.
HAHAHA!!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-25-09
I'm a dinosaur.
How is that so? I mean sure you have the looks and all, but are you not just the illusion of a drug I may be on?
No, I'm a dinosaur.
Ok, screw it, this comic has no concept...

 

by Beeko180
5-25-09
I'm going to tell you a story. One day a man went over to a lady's house.
He never left until the next morning.
You got lucky didn't you?
You bet!

 

by Beeko180
5-25-09
Lieing is easy.
You sure?
Right now I'm wondering wether you could have mistaken white lies as lies.
For you see, you could hide something for years and years and in the end feel so guilty that you let it slip just out of the blue for no reason.
I think you're hot.

 

by Beeko180
5-28-09
Hey, did you hear what Jaimy did?
What?
He licked a dead cat for five bucks.
Loner.
What did I do?
Ever since you killed your mother in a spack attack you've been finding people who are more weird than you are.

 

by Beeko180
5-28-09
YOU STUPID MORON!
?
HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A FAT WANNABE!!!!!
You think an anvil dropped on her head?

 

by Beeko180
5-28-09
Welcome to the inpatients ward for mentally unstable patients.
We collect the bodies every Thursday.
Don't forget to scream as I lock the doors!

 

by Beeko180
5-28-09
Mr. Lincoln, you have a telegram!
Tell it to the judge.
I wasn't accusing you of anything, I was merely stating the opening line to the theme of the comic.
I don't care, every day you come in here and make my life miserable.
How?
The mere existance of you makes me cringe.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Alright kid, prepare for a world of pain.
Goo???
W-what?
Splork!
Damn it!

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
I have a theory as to why men like to drink beer and smoke.
Hit me.
I believe that men are grobby beer-drinking smoke-addicts because without some form of stress-relief they'd go mental.
Actually it's to deal with problems like you.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
This is absolutely fascinating!
How?
Well, you're limbs are completely shattered yet you feel no pain and do everything in an ordinary fashion!
Damn road runner...

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Ever since my wife disapeared, Guy has been acting kinda strange.
Oh?
I mean look at him!

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
I believe that finding happiness is more or less a judgemental thing rather than what everyone agrees on.
Oh?
Yeah, if you think about it, you should come to the realisation that all fantasy novels are made from linen, most frogs are green, and that jumping off a cliff is suicide.
What I'm trying to tell you is that everything is obvious when it doesn't make sense. And that life is a ball of emotions.
Like the emotion you will suddenly come to feel when I tell you that I just spiked your drink with rat poison for no apparent reason other than to watch you suffer.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Fly little birdy, fly!
Up up up, up in the sky!
I'm so god damn high!!!

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Pssst. Have you seen a mouse lately?
I'm a mouse.
No you aren't. You're a duck.
No, I'm serious. I'm a mouse.
You're an honest to god DUCK! And so that I can walk away with the knowledge of winning this argument. I shall congratulate you on your efforts to trick me into thinking that you are a mouse.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
A HA! I'VE GOT YOU NOW DELICIOUS MOUSE!
I'm not a mouse. I'm a duck.
No you aren't. You're an honest to god MOUSE! And to prove my point I will buy three kilograms worth of butter, a stove and some cooking utensils.
They don't sell things to cats.
I will now walk away with the small shred of dignity I have left.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Pssst, have you seen a hunter?
I'm a hunter.
No you aren't. You're a hideous beast from the underworld.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Are you sure that taking all the books on "The Gold Rush Era" will make you filthy rich?
Yupp!
Wow.
What do you mean "wow"?
I'm just amazed at how long you've managed to say concious after all those blows to the head from a pole.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Why is everyone cringing?
Look around!

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
So, Roast lamb it is.
Yeah, oh and don't forget the spice.
Jeff says your cute.
Oh, that's fantastic, I am no longer in my happy place!

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
You ever get the feeling that god is watching us from above?
Nope, why do you ask?
Well, I've been hearing these strange noises in my sleep...
Now, how do you unplug this thing?....

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
Son, now that you're a grown man, I have several things to tell you.
You have cancer.
And three days to live.

 

by Beeko180
5-29-09
I'm tellin' ya lady! I did NOT want onions on this sandwich!
Well woopty dangle freakin' doo!
That's too bad for you!
You been reading those Dr. Sues books again?
And it's a pain too!

Showing page 46.

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