All comics by BGG

Profile

 

by BGG
1-27-03
Well, Bjorn? Is the antichrist ready for the world above?
Yes, Johan, sir! I have him right here.
All we need now is somewhere for him to gain his strength, and some foolish mortal to take care of him...
Its under control.
BillyGoatGruff's house, Sunday morning
what the..
Youth Pull: Damien, 17. A satanic force of pure evil who is destined to destroy the world and bring agony to all he meets. Has disastrous morals and outstanding horns.

 

by BGG
1-27-03
Hello, dougal? I think I just promoted the antichrist from my youth squad!
Sure you did, Billy. Is his speciality "Singing Blue songs"?
I'm serious! Check him out, player ID 666.
OK, OK, I'm looking..
Uh, Billy, your stadium is on fire.
*%#@!!

 

by BGG
1-28-03
Dear HT-Johan. I got your mail about taking good care of the antichrist, but I'm going to fire him before he eats the rest of my supporters club
*ring ring*
I wouldnt do that if I was you.
Who is thi..JOHAN?! How did you get my.. WHY THE HELL NOT??
Hello.
I see.

 

by BGG
1-29-03
Johan sends Death to "Talk" to Billy.
Are you here to...take me away?
Nah. Just to frighten you.
Good job. So now what?
I dont know. Uh, you want to go get some sushi?
Dont have the fugu.
So, is Elvis dead, or what?

 

by BGG
1-29-03
Death and Billy head to a sushi bar.
So, you work for Johan?
He's the boss, but basically I'm subserviant to the evil of the HT development team. Hey, thats not sunshine, is it?
Jesus!
ow!
I thought sunshine only killed vampires.
Please dont sneeze.

 

by BGG
1-29-03
Hello, Johan? Who the hell do you think you are sending Death to my house? And if I want to delete the damn antichrist, I will! And the new conference sytem SUCKS, and..
I'm.....No, dont....server load....
Bjorn, help! Its Billy, and he's pissed!
Dont let him bully you! Remind him just who is the Prince Of Darkness!
....now the poor guy is just a big pile of ash, and what are you going to do about it?
Once I microwaved a puppy.

 

by BGG
1-30-03
In a break from our story, author and star chat about stuff.
Billy, we've been making strips for a few days now, and I thought we might talk about a couple of things that have been confusing me about some of the other regular posters.
OK, go ahead.
What the hell is going on with callie_chan and that BDD person?
Good question, Tim. Having looked through their respective strips, she seems to be a funny but odd online RPG person, and he seems to be, frankly, rabid. They send each other strips about stuff.
So, is it comic strip warfare, or comic strip foreplay?
Either way, that tentacle thing she uses scares the shit out of me.

 

by BGG
1-30-03
BGG, you ass-cramer, I dont know if you saw, but because of you that scary tentacle has lost its job in Callie_chans strips.
Did you just call me an ass-cramer?
Because of you, its on the loose! I could be hideously violated by a vengeful monstrous creature of the deep AT ANY SECOND.
I'm not having that kind of abuse in my strip.
THIS ISNT FUNNY.
**hums theme music from Jaws**

 

by BGG
2-01-03
BGG, where the hell have you been?
Its a long story about an overly zealous tech guy, a bitch of a firewall and an office revolution led by a mild mannered man pushed too far.
Thats nice. Anyway, while you've been away, callie gave the tentacle its job back!
It culminated with a desperate last stand of the IT department behind a wooden barricade in the server room. But I had an axe!
But now she's set something called Cthulhu loose. I think it wants to eat my face.
Here, I brought you an arm.

 

by BGG
2-01-03
Did you hear? Another monster out for my blood.
Yeah, I heard. Wasnt Cthulhu the black girl officer in the first series of Star Trek?
I dont think its the same person, unless she had disgusting tentacle things surrounding her mouth.
Nope, she was unnatural growth free.
Unlike Kirks head. *heeeheehee*
Could you focus, please?

 

by BGG
2-01-03
Having read BDD and callie_chans strips of the last 2 days, here is an artists impression of how a meeting between the two in a bar would work out.
Hi, I'm BDD.
I'm probably going to Mace you now.
She's aroused! I'll make my move.

 

by BGG
2-05-03
cthulhu and Billy chat, after being forced together by callie_chans manipulations.
Wait, you thought I was going to eat your living brains?
Sorry, but you ARE a sea monster, right? Isnt that what you do?
Not any more. Now I make guest appearances in peoples strips, posing questions with interesting ocean based twists.
Really? No primordial wrath bringing of any kind?
Nope. Say, what would fish taste like if women didnt swim?
I dont know. Wait here while I go think of something evil to do to callie.

 

by BGG
2-06-03
BGG, we need something evil to do to callie. cthulhu is a debt we must repay.
Excellent. Actually, I do have an idea, Billy. We'll call it.. OPERATION PLOT DEVICE.
We'll need a big net, a TV, and a video tape of the Sound Of Music, repeated 47 times in a continuous loop.
If there is no mention of some kind of edged weapon in the next 4 seconds, I'm walking.
Oh, and a comfy sofa, and a bowl of pot pouri.
Callie would have had me sacrificing an elephant by now. I want no part of this.

 

by BGG
2-06-03
Billy. refusing any part of BGG's plan of callie-focused evil, runs into cthulhu again.
Hello again Billy. Did you know the average ejaculation of a Blue whale is 200 gallons of semen? And that only 20 gallons of that ends up in the female?
No, and so what?
Well, ever wondered why sea water tastes salty?
....
Wait, I have many more!
BGG? I'm in, tell me the damn plan.

 

by BGG
2-09-03
BGG reveals part of the evil plan.
So whats the big evil plan?
We are going to kidnap del-me!
FUCK that. Fuck it, right in the ear. I'm not presenting myself for violation.
You'll be perfectly safe, I promise. Anyway, thats only the first stage.
What, and I realise I probably dont want to know, do you plan to do with a captured sex-crazed tentacle?
Shut up and follow me. Bring those ropes and the VCR.

 

by BGG
2-09-03
So, where does del-me actually live?
I had a look through callies strips, but I couldnt find one with del-me in his natural habitat. I'll have to make something up.
OK. Lets look at this. He's mouldy green, has no head, and doesnt really seem to care how disgusting a person is, as long as he can violate them.
Hmm. Maybe he's Kurt Cobain?
You are so going to hell for that one.
Yeah. Reading it back gives me toothache in my eyes.

 

by BGG
2-11-03
Think we can find a tentacle with a molesting addiction in a background like this?
Whatever. Can we get to the plan soon? I'm not sure she's taking you seriously.
We have to set the scene.
Fine. You do know while you're scene setting, all her charas are sharpening axes, recharging taser batteries and preparing really hurtful coments, right?
She's even got Jesus on her side! Whats the plan on combating THAT, huh?
I'm banking on her fickle female mind deciding to go shopping at precisely the wrong moment.

 

by BGG
2-11-03
Theres del-me! Now to lure him back to the house by letting him violate you.
OK! Finally some action...
Wait, back up a second..does that say "by letting him violate you"? It does! What the hell is wrong with you?
Just take one for the team, you coward! I dont hear you coming up with any ideas!
TELL HIM YOU HAVE LUBE!
Mr del-me? I'm with the Nobel comittee, and we'd like to present you with a prize for furthering human-tentacle relations. Could you follow me please?

 

by BGG
12-04-04
Billy! Hey! Its been almost 2 years! So, how'd the plan go?
eeee
Billy?
eeee
Ah. I didnt actually *TELL* you the rest of the plan, did I. I just left you alone in a pit with a sex crazed, serial violator tentacle. For two years.
eeee

 

by BGG
12-04-04
God, 2 years of Del-me violating you.
eeee
Turn around for a sec?
eeee
Dear sweet Jesus! Your ass looks like the flag of Japan!
eeee?

Showing page 1.