All comics by Jonas

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by Jonas
8-26-02
Hey! You wanna check out some of my chicks?
Don't worry, you're not going insane. This does not, in fact, make any sense.
Excuse me, can you tell me the way to Warcraft III? I have an appointment at 11

 

by Jonas
8-26-02
...but... but I can't possibly be dead! What did I die of?
Remember that bathtub full of acid? You slipped.
But... but that can't be... I feel fine!
You're dead. Believe me, I can tell.
...might some money convince you otherwise?

 

by Jonas
8-26-02
3...
2...
1...
That was the largest bird I have ever seen. And it'd eaten something very smelly too...

 

by Jonas
8-26-02
Hey, can you tell me the way to Blizzard's headquaters?
AAAAAAAAAH!!!
Oh, that looks like it hurt.
*SPLAT*

 

by Jonas
8-26-02
I can't believe they assigned me this crappy Northrend part. God it is FREEZING here!
Hi, I'm Drakey. I'm supposed to kill you now.
Oh man! Already? Alright, but you aren't gonna actua--
*Cough*
Ahem. Come with me.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
So... this is limbo?
Yes. Wait here for the keeper to come.
Hi, I'm the limbo keeper.
OH MY GOD! You're that goddamned annoying windows thing!
I think I know which way you're going.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
What the hell!?
Exactly!
Wh-- I'm in Hell??
Indeed you are. I can tell there's no fooling you.
Is this supposed to be a punishment?
I think you're gonna fit in very well here. Here, this way...

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
*Knock knock*
He-- Wait, don't I know you?
I think you do, yes.
But... I'm not dead.
Ha! I won't fall for that again. You've fooled me for the last time!

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
One day, at a really crappy concert...
Guess what...
The audience don't like your music.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
You look like you could use a hand.
YES!
Or how about a tentacle?
A tentacle?
No, not a tentacle! NOT A TENTACLE!

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
One day, in the middle of a dangerous scientific experiment...
Hmm... the electronic syntax analyzer looks a bit unstable. I'm getting an unexpected amount of interference...
I hope I secured the spectrogram transmitter well enough, or it might be a little dangerous to handle...
Oh, that can't be a good sign...

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
One day, in a (literally) underworld bar...
Hey Reapy! Long time no see. Can I get you anything?
*Sigh* Hello Chuck. Just gimme the usual.
One Bloody Mary coming right up. How you been doing?
Fine I guess. Work's getting a bit tiring. I'm sick of people claiming they're not dead when they're freakin' bleeding all over the floor!
Yeah, I can relate to that. It's always "Ah, spare my life, please don't kill me, I'm too young to die, yada yada yada." You know what? You should take a trip over to Oddworld. That always helps.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
*Sigh* Where is that damned entrance...?
Ah, there it was.
Welcome to Oddworld
Hehe, gotta love this place.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
BOO!!!
AAAAH!
Oops...

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
Whaddaya mean this dress makes me look fat!? THIS ISN'T A DRESS!!!
I'll give you "dirty fingernails" you fat old bastard!
Hmm... where did I put those socks...?
I did NOT eat your grenades you fool! You're not even a real soldier! You're made of tin!
This is getting a tad too weird for my taste. I'm outta here.

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
Ah, been a while since I last visited this place.
Look! It's him!
Yeah! He put us here! LET'S GET HIM!
AAAAAARGH!
I hate it when that happens...

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
Hey, Reapy old friend! You fresh for a duel of willpower again?
Hmm... well, why not. We used to have such fun in the old days.
*BOOM!* *WHOOSH!* *FLASH!*
*BANG!* *SWISH!* *KABOOM!*
Haha, as fun as I remember!
I hate it when they do that...

 

by Jonas
8-27-02
*BEEP BEEP BEEP!*
Oh, just a minute, I gotta go get someone.
*POOF!*
BOO!
ACK! WHEEZE! HEAVE! *Die*
Back, sorry.
Ah, that's ok. I appreciate the new customers.

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
And for my English project, I'd like to summon Death himself!
SWEET! It worked!
Not really, the blackboard just falls down and kills you in a minute.
Yeah, whatever. As long as there's no more school.
. . .

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
*See "Oddworld #2: I'm pretty sure it's for the better."
Since you killed Clippy*, you gotta find a new keeper for The Void.
I get punished? Shouldn't I get an award or something?
I guess you have a point, but you still gotta find a replacement...
Alright, alright. I'm off.
And stay the hell away from Micosoft this time! It's supposed to be evil, not goddamned terrifying.

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
*Ding Dong*
Heeheehee...
Yes? Uh... hello? Damn kids.

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
Hey Satan! I found the perfect keeper for Limbo!
Good. Who is it?
AAAAAH!
ME!
Isn't it great! I found it in a genetics research lab. It even has telepathic powers!
Well, I suppose it's an improvement over Clippy.

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
Well, Irving. Welcome to your new home.
Wow, this is great! I love the colours!
I'll put my dinner table here, and my antique chinese closet can be over here. I think there's just about room for the indian sofa in that corner, and...
...right... I'll be over here if you need me...
...I might put the clock up besides that large pink swirl, and the picture of grandma will hang perfectly beneath that greenish blob...

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
The following is not a personal statement from the author...
"Dear Luminous Path, I'm sorry, but I couldn't be there to pick you up myself, so I sent a friend to get you for me - Death."
AAAAAAH!
Why, hello there!

 

by Jonas
8-29-02
WILL: You're such an idiot, you know that?
ALEX: As if YOU'RE such a big genious. You were the one who bloody broke up with her in the first place!
Uh... right.
WILL: Yeah? Well I have access to your root directory! Wave goodbye! [Delete file C:\Users\Alex\]

 

by Jonas
8-31-02
Somebody sent me a computer? Hmm... might be useful for keeping track of my clients.
DLL RUNTIME ERROR: 194:76-X#5. If the error continues to happen, please contact your hardware distributer.
Then again, maybe it's not worth the trouble.

 

by Jonas
10-31-02
Lady, I'm sorry, but you'll have to come with me.
I don't think so. You know that guy who draws this strip?
...I'm dating him.
AAAH!

 

by Jonas
10-31-02
Ah, my most frequent source of business...
Windows performed an illegal operation...
What would I do without Microsoft?

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