I ate 3 tubs of Crisco, puked into a flowerpot, pushed an old lady in a wheelchair into a swimming pool, kicked some fat guy in the balls, drove a rocketpowered shopping cart around town...
.....
Threw a stink bomb into a church, had sex with a 200 pound goat, watched I Love Lucy, injected rabies into the local schoolchildren, got a sex change, made a jump rope outta my ass hairs...