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His secondhand smoke has been known to drop bystanders on the spot. He once got lung cancer, but lung cancer won't talk about what happened.
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In a fight between Chuck Norris and God, he won. God now goes to him for advice.
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He's drunk 90% of the time, and getting laid 100%. He'd never tell you that he's better than you, even though he is.
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| I don't always drink beer, and when I do, it's mixed with Everclear. But when I want a pansy drink, I drink Tres Equis. | |
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