All comics by Peej

 

by Peej
4-17-02
One evening Marcus went to check up on his 'ho.
goddamn lil' sister, why no life of wily characters....?
what does this primitive human want with me?
But all did not go to his liking.
hey, bitch. i asked you a question.
leave me alone, you don't love me, you never loved me, you've just been using me this whole time.
So he decided to prove his point, not that he had one in the first place, of course....
maybe so, little one, but soon your soul shall be mine.
oh no! *pain, death, etc*

 

by Peej
4-17-02
One day Little Mikey was visiting the white house and had a strange experience.
jesus, norman, tebit, christ, an alien!
No little boy, i am a happy elf, here to bring you happiness and presents.
But Little Mikey was having none of this strange creatures insinuations. The elf was greatly upset by this fact.
Leave me alone freak-face.
*sniff. sniff*
But lo and behold! Also taking a vacation in washington was none other than Jesus, the Son of God, who, even though taking a break from his usual daily riguors, decided to teach babies a lesson.
You suck ass Little Mikey, and you're very horrible, and now you won't get any presents, and i'm gonna to tell my dad on you.
Oh shit.

 

by Peej
4-18-02
One day litte Jenny was taking a walk in the woods when she came upon a poor, injured squirrel.
Hello little squirrel, would you like to be my friend?
Um, OK.
Jenny had been brought up to be a loving, caring child, always willing to help other people, and especially small, injured animals.
Here, let me tend to your wounds and nurse you back to health with some good ol' TLC.
Um, OK. Would you like a sweetie for your troubles.
But Jenny was also a foolish girl and, although she read the Bible often, she hadn't learnt never to accept sweets from strangers, especially small, injured strangers. And so, the squirrel ate her.
Oh yes, why thank you. Oh no! What are you doing? Ah! *SCREAM*
God damn my good looks and youthful exuberance.

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