FTC 68: The Bad Spur-Of-The-Moment Idea

Author: biped

Date: July 24, 2005

by biped
7-24-05
I could explain to you about chemical reactions of hydrocarbons to lunchmeat, but I'd rather tell you about Mr. Winky-Dinky Bear and the three puppies.
OH BOY, ME LOVE MR. WINKY-DINKY BEAR! But me never hear the story about the three puppies...tell me about them! Tell me! TELL ME!
NO! I WILL CUT A BIG HOLE IN YOUR BACK AND PUT THE STORY IN THERE INSTEAD!
HURRY UP! CUT ME OPEN AND PUT THE STORY ABOUT MR. WINKY-DINKY BEAR AND THE THREE PUPPIES IN THERE! NOW!
...and...and she died while I was trying to put the story in the hole...I didn't know how... I...DIDN'T... KNOW... HOW...
Huh. Well, I didn't kill anybody. I'm just here because I won a horse-masturbating contest on "Fear Factor."