All comics by djphil

Profile

 

by djphil
10-26-02
i like cheese
do you have any cheese?
yeah but you gotta milk me first
sure thing boss
well what are you waiting for milke me baby!

 

by djphil
10-27-02
as lenny tries to figure life out....
i wonder what i should do today...
what the fuck is this guy up too??
he finds himself in a awkward situation...
i wonder what this squirrel is up to
i like bald men!
that is oh so real...
so its ok that we are life partners!
wanna taste my nuts...

 

by djphil
10-28-02
voltor and dr. bill
whats that your eating Dr.
its a freakin bannana......
votor and dr. bill dont agree....
im sorry that does not match any of my program references....
i put everything into your program....
dr. bill cant handle the incompetence...
i wish my father was bill gates!!!!!
idiot...

 

by djphil
10-28-02
this a pretty sweet spaceship we hotwired...lets see wheres the warp drive button...
yeah lets see how fast this bitch goes...maybe its that button over there...
shit.....i think we just blew up uranus..
well looks like were fucked....

 

by djphil
10-28-02
things are going smoothly for reggie...
sure!
i had a great time tonite...want to come in?
until...
im a turtle neck kind of guy if you know what i mean...
the rejection...
damn...
dont call me

 

by djphil
10-28-02
the real problem...
that's the last time i bail you out...
thanks man... i owe you big...
the confrontation...
when are you gonna stop doing crack?? the last time i picked you up you thought you were a sheep dog...
i dont know but im down to 2 packs of carrots a day...
solution...
what?!?
im outta here...

 

by djphil
10-30-02
live...
well i luv you, and i need you in my life, but it wont work right now...
ok??
love...
your not talking...
what can i say...maybe youll miss me when im gone...
lose...
?

 

by djphil
11-04-02
wow this new park bench is pretty compfy
yeah my bushy lil tail aint complaining
it took awhile but good ol ranger todd finnaly came through...
thank god...if i had to jerk him off with my tail one more time...
you what?!?
don't act so suprised...

 

by djphil
11-04-02
shes leaving me.....
i am filled with feelings of rage and deciept...
on the other hand i am single now...

 

by djphil
11-04-02
this means ill have a lot of free time now...
eh what can ya do...
i guess ill go finnish building that 2 seater bicycle...

 

by djphil
11-05-02
remember that kid we use to hang out with that liked milk.....
yeah up until he became a fuckin hippie...
i like trees....
i hear his girlfriend is pretty ugly....
yeah i think that is punishment enough....

 

by djphil
11-13-02
confusion...
???
resolve...
i dont know what gets in my head sometimes...
finish...
well i better finish what i started...

 

by djphil
11-14-02
the uncomfortable conversation...
so is that all you did for ranger todd??
not really...
the details...
what do you mean not really?!?
well there was this one thing that involved a tube of peanut butter, a coat hanger, and a paper towel tube...and....
end...
just stop there...
and then i would...

 

by djphil
11-24-02
well it was nice actually seeing you...give me a call if you want to hang out...
i told you i cant call you at your new house...
why is that...whoever is home will tell me you called...
i know, i just feel weird...
so does our whole friendship...

 

by djphil
11-26-02
there is no time to waste i must act...
what the fuck??
eh the power must have went out...

 

by djphil
11-26-02
back into confusion...
now what was i doing?? Oh yeah!
remembering...
I must destroy....
Mail Call
a change in events?
Dear Lenny,

 

by djphil
11-26-02
Billy thinks everything is going smooth...
Gimme your fuckin money....
what?? do you know who your fucking with...
He stays confident...
Im a kangaroo with a fuckin gun...give it up!
I AM THE DEVIL!!!! Feel My WRATH...
A turn for the worst....
i think the gun is melting to my hand...
HAHAHAHAHAHAAA....

 

by djphil
11-26-02
Leon is on the hunt...
This is too easy...
the worry...
swim faster sis well never make it...
you try having kids and keep in shape...
help is on the way...
Im a dolphin i bring rainbows and peace...i can help!!!!

 

by djphil
11-28-02
its been awhile since ive sceene you...
far out man...
what the fuck happened...did the 60's vomit on you??
no man, its all about nature and bein with my lady...
you found someone to put up with you...
yeah shes way far out...

 

by djphil
12-03-02
lenny gets a break...
You have been chosen to go to an all expense paid nude resort...
the chance of a life time...
So bring as little as you want and get ready for...
the contimplating...
Eh all i own is this blue smock i wear...so what should i do??

 

by djphil
12-03-02
reggies second chance...
Well it was nice idea to come on a picnic...
I am a gourmet cheff you know...
here comes the smoothness...
Really?!?!
Yeah i use to work in this little bar...
things just keep getting worse...
what did you serve...
well it was as strip club...

 

by djphil
12-16-02
im frustrated...
i dont care...
...
but i do care...
ill never understand...
i wont let you...

 

by djphil
12-16-02
the thought...
well its almost time to build a nest...
yeah hopefully itll be big enough for our nuts...
the awkwardness...
you do have big ones...
oh god...
the rage...
you know whoelse has big nuts...
if you say ranger todd ill kill you...

 

by djphil
1-01-03
well son did you learn your leason?
yes. i think i have...
i dont ever want to see you doing that again...
sorry dude...
no really i mean it...
wanker

 

by djphil
1-09-03
lenny is doin good...
i love those elad kids...
what if i cut your face with this thing...
lunch box...

 

by djphil
1-12-03

 

by djphil
2-11-03
hapiness is just around the corner...
well i just started my next level of education...
where the hapiness is...
and that would be college...
got it...
i met a girl...

 

by djphil
3-25-03
mission possible...
so were ready to do this!
Hell Yeah...
thoughts....
i think well do good...
good well do great...
energize...
i cant wait....
neither can i....

 

by djphil
3-25-03
gettin ready for war...
are you ready soldier?!?!
yes sir!
the moitvation...
go, fight, kill!!!
thats what i intend to do sir...
realization...
wait your just a kangaroo....
im a kangaroo with a gun....

 

by djphil
3-25-03
and it goes on...
wow...im shocked you came to get me!
yeah well, i felt bad for you...
and on...
so does this mean we have another chance??
well i wouldnt say....
why?
so wanna go back to my place?
......

 

by djphil
6-13-03
pirates....
arrrrrrrg.....allow me to intraduce me self....
i am the american pirate... arrrrrrrrg....i truly loves me country....
so lets me take ye on a tour of me ship....arrrrrrrrrg.....

 

by djphil
6-13-03
the saga continues...
welcome to the grease factory...how can i help you....oh hey its you...
yeah dont get excited...
the let down...
so uh...what can i get for you...and howve you been??
well...i just want a salad of some sort....
??
we dont have those here....but we do have 23,933 different cuts of animals....
oh....well then....

 

by djphil
6-13-03
partiotism...
go fight kill for your country... uncle sam wants you...
decision...
hmmm....im not really all for this war....
punishment to those who oppose...
who'd a thunk it...

 

by djphil
6-16-03
Hi kids im Mr. Smokey....im here to tell you how good i am for you!.... but first you should know some facts...
Experiencing Technical Difficulties
So there you have it....smoke em if you got em...and remember what i told you...

 

by djphil
6-21-03
the tour...
arrrrrr!! welcome abord matee....arrrrrrr....well this is me ship...let me show you arounds it...
if ye acts up...ye will find ye self in me brig...arrr...
now lets me take you on to me qaurters....arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg...

 

by djphil
6-24-03
the old
so your to the edge...
yeah....i would never poison my body...
the newly conformed...
whoa what happened to you...
i got a girlfriend....
?
so i hear you drink now....
lets get wasted....

 

by djphil
2-08-04
?
i am all used up...
?

 

by djphil
2-08-04
pirates fucking rule...
arrrrrrrrr
pirates fucking rule...
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
pirates fucking rule...
gggggggggggghhh

 

by djphil
4-20-04
i am a penguin!!!
A hardcore penguin...
poison the well was sweet!

 

by djphil
4-22-04
i fucking love yellow card
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

by djphil
3-18-06
a dogs life
i like sniffing butts...
especially my own....
butts are cool...

 

by djphil
8-23-09
i have to go to the bathroom!!!!!
and the new guy has totally been pissing me off!!
where is his mailbox again?

 

by djphil
8-29-09
Double down = Greatness
Hey everyone! My friend here Mr. Bacon are here to tell you about KFC's new all chicken bacon and cheese sandwich!! To tell you more we go to the chef that created it!
BACON FUCKING RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I get so inspired by the abstract, that i think, lets make the meat the bread, unfortunatley all that grease, cheese, and bacon will get you.....
Worth it.....
When your done shitting blood, i have to take your temprature....

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