All comics by thejohnboy

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by thejohnboy
1-06-03
A New Dress...
Hey Kenny, what do ya think about my new dress?
little white lies....
Fuck White Lies...
[gasp]
It makes you look like an old whore, and a cheap one at that!
Just Walk Away....
Kenny! That hurt's deep down inside when you say things like that to me!
Use more spit when you take it in the ass...and it won't hurt...whore....

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
A Meeting Is Called
Do You Know Why You've Been Called To This Meeting In My Office?
This isn't your office, you don't even have an office!
Well If You Imagine, that in this office i have special....
Needs?
What! Let Me Finish What I Am Saying...
Tell you what...let's imagine i'm not here at all, and the you can carry on with your ego stroking in your "new office"

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
Revelation on "Casual Day"
I Just Had A Intern Call Me "Cheeky"
I Don't think that's the worst of your worries, i barely got away with this kilt on ethnic reasons, you better think of a reason your in your boxers!
If i claim it helps sperm circulation...maybe...
How the hell did i get confused between "Casual Day" and "Bring Your Partner Day", he's real pissed, and he wants to see you next!
Who, Owen? He's not even management...i sense some brown nosing going on here...

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
Down on Sex Pest Street...
God, if i could just hide behind something and jack one off i'd feel so much better...
e--excuse me young man, i just got called a "AID'S Infested Wank-Rag" whilst i was walking past the "Brown Thumb" pub, can you please tell me what AIDS stands for?
"Ass Injected Death Sentance" err...Ma'am
Oh good God! good-day Sir!
Meanwhile Outside The Brown Thumb...
You see little girl...my philosphy is that what can't say "NO", might aswell be saying "YES!".....
What's a Rim Job Mister?

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
juicy love flaps?
throbbing porridge gun?
Its no good...i've just cum...

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
Hey Lil Girl! Wanna Come For A Ride In A Police Car?
No Thankyou Officer, Mommy Told Me Not To Take Rides With Strangers!
Come on! I'll Pay You!
So Close..
Father Pheely! What are you doing in a Police Car?
Yes Its Me Father Pheely! Just Testing you kid, well done!

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
The News...
News Just In...Most of us are never truly loved...we die alone...often of a terrible illness..

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
In Gimplore's Cell
And What Do You Do Son?
Anything I Can Get My Hands On, Sir....

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
A Childs Rhyme...
Oi Fish Fancy a Duck?
i can fly?

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
All alone again...
hmmmm
maybe....
if i just dont think about pr0n...
uh-oh...
I Just thought about it....
Its No Good....I've Just Cum

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
At Post Office Ltd HQ....
Oh Matt...What are you still doing here?
It's like 9:30am....Sir...
Oh...Didn't you get the letter on Saturday?
No...Sir, Not From The Post Office...
Oh, Well Then I'll Tell You Now, You're Fired...
&*%$!

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
that monday morning feeling...
7:30 am....get up
why fucking bother
i won't...

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
On the telephone...
Mr.Thompson? Yes its Pete Chiselchin, im afraid i wont be in today, im sick....
How Sick?
Well a minute ago, i was licking the sweat off my grandpa's back as i fisted his asshole...
***dead line tone***

 

by thejohnboy
1-06-03
*ugh...ugh..umf...unf**
excuse me sir...what ARE you doing....?
*oh...yeah...fwah..unf*
caught "visiting" grandma...
i'll turn my back for five seconds, and you better be gone...
Hey! i'm only tryng to wake her up!

 

by thejohnboy
1-07-03
Political Correctness In Comedy
This is my new "fun sized" girlfriend
why is he squinting?
"fun sized"?
yeah..its still midget behind her back..

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
Jim The Necrophile is at work...
*snigger*Would you like me to help you across the street old lady? *snigger*
oo...yes please young man...
Until...
Commander Morale!
drat!
Yes! Its me, and your plans to kill and then constantly bugger that old lady have been thwarted!

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
Farmer Cain has thoughts of beastiality..
why...just me and this shocked looking bird...it looks so shocked, nobody would ever know i just performed a forced enema on it!
sqaawwkk?
At The Speed Of Light!
Commander Morale!
actually i was fetching the lube, but whatever...
Little Did Cain Know, that this small, innocent little girl, was about to come hopping and skipping around the corner! i have stopped the scarring of a small childs mind!

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
Commander Morale, Guarding the gates of the whitehouse from smut!
Wow, what a cracker...notice the bulge in my over-pants...
Aha! Commander Morale! The Bane of Dinnertime television, and the guiding light of the world's skewed pose on sexual morale!
At last an enemy worth fighting!
Yes...You've found me, what of it...and who are you?
I Am Crackhead The Rabbit! The Leader of The International Sex Pest/Pervert Movement, i am the figurehead of all the things you hate!
Until It Dawns on the commander...
Unfortunatly i am stuck in this pose, as there is a childrens TV show camera pointed on me at all times, i am helpless, what are you going to do?
I am going to KISS you, then Fist you....to death...!*maniacal laughter ensues*

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
Two Sweet Little Girls...
YOU! are the most annoying hovering child i have ever met! I am going to use your virgin ass-hole to be sick into!
?
Scarred For Life
The Same Goes With You, your a flagrant little whore and you take it up the ass! SLAG...default characters really get my bra strap!
mommy*sob*
Don't there eyes flollow you around the room! STOP IT
if we keep on staring...he'll replace us with other characters and a new background...and then leave us alone...
virgin...lol...little does he know...

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
In Hell With Lucifer...
Is That A Fucking Cardigan! IT IS!
No, its an executive brown pain-giver's suit!
Like I Said, CARDIGAN! What kind of name is LUCY-FARR anyway, you sound like a bad Pantomine character!
I am the fallen one, God Himself Gave Me That Name!
Face it, your a BDSM freak, you might aswell wear a Gimp-Suit you AIDS infested ass flap!
this guy is good...

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
The "Hunk"
[LatteHunk]: Hey there hot ass...fancy some hot cock mummy action?
*H0THuNNI Is Online*
w00t! Mission Control...You Have r00t...
[H0THuNNI]:Hell yeah hunky, have to be quick tho, i'm off out to a movie premiere tonight...
The "Hunni"
[LatteHunk]: Good, cos i been working out all day, and my pex are bursting...wanna see my one eyed milkman on cAm?
why won't he ever show his face...must be famous...

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
Yes I Do Accept your Apology Jeff, for calling me Crackhead "Bunny" instead of "Rabbit" the latter being correct...."Bunny" Gives the Impression that i am sweet and kind..where in real life...
flowers too much...?
The Reality
I Sneak Up On Little girls and shove my fist so far up there closed poo-poo hole, i can scratch the inside of there fetid GINGER MULLET!
fwoppy eared bunny...

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
On the phone to hell..
Operator? yes could you please put me through to the admissions office of hell? thankyou.
Yes Sir, One Moment Please...
In Hell...
[ring,ring]
Good Morning, Hell, Admission's Gary Speaking...How May I Condemn You?
Back On Earth...
Ah, Crackhead Rabbit here, i was wondering, as i have many sinful plans, whether i could book an en-suite room, with 24hour buggering option...is that possible?
Hmm...well we're full for the next 20 years, so if you spend the next two decades sodomaising and being a general sade'ist, we will definatly have something for you...else i'll just pencil you in...

 

by thejohnboy
1-08-03
what would you rather see?
me cutting my penis off and then stamping on it with all the class of a uttoxeter racehourse?
Or me pulling a silly expression and saying "Shut the fuck up"

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