All comics by turboff

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by turboff
3-19-01
are your base are belong to us!
mocha latte (snap snap snap)
All your base are belong to us!
Uh, oh!
All your base are belong to us!
Father, Father! Why have you forsaken me?

 

by turboff
3-19-01
Earlier.
Watch me.
Okay!
Later.
You watching?
I am!
Eventually.
Still watching?
Grrzzzpppttttt.

 

by turboff
3-20-01
POPCORN!
Peanuts! Cold Beer!
Red Hots!

 

by turboff
3-20-01
PORN AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE.
TELL ME ABOUT IT.
REMEMBER "BEHIND THE GREEN DOOR"?
GA GA GA GOOEY!
I'VE STILL GOT A COPY...
I'LL GET A TISSUE.

 

by turboff
3-21-01
Kubrick was a genius of contemplative cinema.
Elitist.
Cronenberg brilliantly comments upon our culturalhegemony.
Extremist.
"CrouchingTiger,HiddenDragon"sucked.
Fascist.

 

by turboff
3-21-01
Are you watching "The Man Show" again?
That show is denigrating to women and there is nothing even remotely funny about it!
Are you gonna turn that thing off?
THAT DOES IT ! ! ! ! I AM LEAVING ! ! ! !
"and now, girls jumping on trampolines!"
ha ha hee hee - what honey? Hey could you get some beer on the way back?

 

by turboff
3-21-01
Honey, what's wrong?
Nothing.
Seriously, baby . . . what's the matter??
Nothing. Really...Nothing.
Okay, Goodnight.
Bastard.

 

by turboff
3-21-01
READY?
SET?
GO ! ! !
GO ! ! !

 

by turboff
3-22-01
Porn is not a great way to make a living.
Tell me about it.
Yeah, tell me about it.
Tell ME about it.
Please tell us about it.
Back to work WIZZO 36 !

 

by turboff
3-22-01
Mmmmrrrrrrgggghhhh. Ninety-six. . .
Anything?
Not yet. Mmmmrrrrrrgggghhhh. Ninety-seven . . .
So?
Nope. Lessee. Oh yeah. Mmmmaaaaarrrgggghhhh! Ninety-eight . . .
Hey, stranger things have happened.

 

by turboff
3-24-01
Dad, how come you aways drag me to these stupid baseball games?
Well son, it's important for a boy to have heroes.
But , dad, I hate baseball. Besides I have a hero.
Okay next week we'll do something that's more exciting for you. What'd you have in mind?
I wanna take your headless corpse to the Marilyn Manson concert on Friday.
Ask your mother.

 

by turboff
3-24-01
Father, Father, Why have you forsaken me?
Because son, you can't just .................
Walk around acting like you're.................
God'sgift to man !.................

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Like, what is the sound of one hand clapping, Daddy-o?
Remember the sound your parents made when you told 'em you were movin' out, cool cat?

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Like, what is the sound of one hand clapping, Daddy-o?
Oddly, it sounds alot like masturbation, cool cat.

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Like, what is it that surpasses the buddhas, and surpasses the patriarchs. . . Daddy-o?
Espresso, man! Espresso!

 

by turboff
4-01-01
There is no self, & no other than self.
There is no caffeine, and no other than caffeine.

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Yo, Daddy-ohhh. When we stop movement, there is no-movement; when we stop resting, there is no-resting.
Right on, cool cat. And when we stop sipping, there is no-buzz.

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Hey, Daddy-ohhhh! It has been said, "If the eye does not sleep, all dreaming ceases naturally."
Back to writing your dissertation, huh?

 

by turboff
4-01-01
Stop copying me!
Stop copying me!
Quit it!
Quit it!
Go to hell!
You go to hell!

 

by turboff
12-24-07
Listen carefully, my little minion.
Roger that.
You listening?
Check.
...and....TRANSFORM!
WTF?!

 

The End.
Damn. I was just getting warmed up.
by turboff, 12-24-07

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