Is it just me, or does anyone else think we should call DSS?

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Is it just me, or does anyone else think we should call DSS?

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Botticelli's Madonna and Victim.

Trixie Midtharpe demonstrates the "choking" technique she successfully taught the Ottawa Senators.

Everyone agreed that Thelma had been acting different since the ballistic missile emerged from her head.

When pruning your child, it's best to pinch off rather than shear away excess growth.

Some become angry when their child swallows small coins. Some become angry when their child swallows small animals.
People become even more angry when their child doesn't swallow at all.

Tired of practical jokes involving baby shit and butterscotch pudding, Ms Truxillo exercised a little-known ordinance in daycare discipline today, strangling the eight worst behaved children under her supervision.

"Nah, it just snaps right back on, see?"

"...and when you want him to stop crying, you do this."

"And this is about how far his head was in my vagina this morning."

"Sometimes I twist their heads off like this. And sometimes I just pop 'em in the microwave and watch 'em blow up. Either way, I just love killin' babies."

Gina never could figure out exactly why her new method of discipline didn't impress the child protection agency.

Before she became a baby dominatrix, Marge had no idea that so many babies were into sado-masochism and were willing to pay big money for her services.

Oh, Chicka had her baby already?