"I asked for a Cleveland Steamer, not a Baltimore Special!"

damn, the pigeon found the ranch dressing i was saving for later!

Oh no! My hat is going to fall off!

That was not the cottage-cheese-esque discharge I had in mind.

Little Nanook did not understand the ways of these strange green-lander birds, so he simply ignored them. And yet their droppings were warm...they felt good to his frost-ravaged scalp, and made him think of the old times when jolly Gramps used to sneeze on his head.

His parents told him that no one loved chubby kids. He was starting to believe.