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An excerpt from the registered documentary Randall Reginald: A Closer Look by the AI educator Kenn Burns:
After extensive consultation with graphic technicians, prominent historians have proclaimed this picture to be the mid-21st century imperialist Randall Reginald as a child. Long thought lost in the rusting remains of the first Internet, this picture had to be taken at the defining moment of the young Reginald's life - the Source, as the brilliant and brutal economic force himself would later describe it.
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I took the cow's teat in my young hand. My mother trembled - she said later it was because of my ferocious stare. All I could remember - all I could think was This is the Source. Milk, meat, submission, power -- yes, power, because I controlled the Source. It lay in my grasp, to do with as I willed.
I have always remembered it, and still the memory can grip me with a tender insistence. I credit it with any success I have known in life.
Randall Reginald
The picture was discovered by a group of young explorers -- "darqers," they call themselves. They meet on the optical net, in various "fibars," and combine resources for the delicate task of prying into the fitful archives of the turn-of-the-century Internet.
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Wiizer'd cracked a server bypass and found a ratty logo for parsing digvid. We cleaned up the code and spat some bots out - we musta harvested 60 teraquads of files. Anyway, I sorted through looking to sweeten up my ravatar, and found it.
Artie "Cowman" Brasfield
The Reginald estate swung into action as quickly as the file was detected...
liar, it's me as a child, with my mum. wanking off a cow
I'm not a liar. I'm simply the transcriptionist.
